Investing in Us: Holidays, Health, and the Road to £150k

debtfreewannabe321

It's too late I messaged him 😠 and got his usual response of no I won't be letting you know in future, I will let my neighbour know instead.

And he does indeed take a lot of my thoughts up since taking my child from me. Before that he didn't, until he would annoy me. And you're right he's never thought of anyone but himself. He has done this to annoy me though, and control - taking DS2. Not anything after that. He's already done it in the very process of removing him from a safe and stable home. DS is struggling now with school, social aspects, and depression as well as his health. He was rarely ill and now he seems to be quite a lot. I think much of it is to do with stress.

Although we've been parents the same amount of time there have been large parts, especially of DS1 life, where he has disappeared for years at a time - 3 continuous years was the longest. He has no interest in parenting I was a single parent even when married. He has no friends because of how competitive he is, and that's all he sees me as. Competition. Nothing more, nothing less.

My heart is racing, raging, I am going to put my phone down now and go and calm down before I cry. DS has gone into dark mode again, reading my messages and ignoring them. He's stuck in the middle and I'm trying desperately not to do that to him but I know he's getting it from the gf and dad anyway (according to dd).

Baldybear

So.sorry that you are still having issues with ds, i think for now messages to ds as before simple and short. And an email to school advising of the current situation, parent has left child and gone on holiday, then the school may raise a safeguarding issue, but that is between them and his dad. And then try and draw a line under it and try amd move on.

The old saying it will be alright in the end if it isnt alright its not the end. Big hugs and will keep hoping for a positive outcome whenever that may be.

The financial plan sounds good, always good to get rid of the debt thats my plan this year just want it gone then can move on properly.

daisy_1571

So sorry to read all this, I wish I could bestow maturity on your lad so he could see through it all and realise which parent would actually help prepare him for an easier adulthood 😢

Dxxxxx

debtfreewannabe321

So I've not done hardly anything today, I have had plenty of tears and felt very down, very frustrated by life right now but haven't achieved very much. Had the MRI. The only thing I've actually achieved today. Was in there around half hour and they were running bang on time so that was good. The noise reminded me of a noisy printer,.horses hooves on the road and thankfully my hearing isn't great so wasn't as noisy as they warned me it would be. I'm sure I'll hear back in a few weeks time it was all fine and once again all my symptoms are in my mind 🙂. So I'm not worried.

I've done dinner and tidied up, and think I'll finish watching my programme (6 parter I found on Netflix) and will get in the bath and go read my book before meditating. I don't need to leave the house until 8:40 tomorrow, this seems so late to me as I'm usually out by 7. But I'm taking it easy this week and to hell with the consequences of not having torn myself in two to get everything done that needs to be done when there is only one of me and double the amount of 'urgent' jobs that need doing. I'm doing my hours and no more. And I won't give a flip about what anyone has to say about this. 🙂

We've barely any food in and I don't care either. I didn't feel like shopping today.

This text box is driving me up the wall as it keeps moving the cursor to half way through words..so I'm leaving it there. Before I cry again 😭😆.

daisy_1571

Please accept some dodgy hugs from us xxxxxx

debtfreewannabe321

Thanks @daisy_1571 xxx

I'm really struggling today to actually keep my eyes open. DD has had some sort of cold / bug thing, I'm really hoping she hasn't given it to me as I feel drowsy rather than my usual exhaustion 🫠 something new to add to the mix huh. Would explain why I was feeling so tearful yesterday though as really am dog tired today. I could do with a power nap but am sat in a busy carpark waiting for my next appointment. So maybe not 🙈. It could also be because I've not fuelled myself with half a dozen cups of tea this morning...hmm.. perhaps I'll have one to get me through the day, I have quite a long drive home after this. Three more hours left today when I go in.

I've received several emails from work today, usually cc'd in is me and newbie and only me today 🙏🏻🤞🏻🫢...say no more.

I really need to go food shopping later but I don't know if I'm going to be able to keep my eyes open to do it (seriously 😳)!

I've planned my diary well for tomorrow meaning I have lots of driving and only 5 working hours (with people) as opposed to my usual 7+ with people.

Right I'm off. Hopefully can get through the afternoon nice and quickly.

Watty1

Can you think of something really simple for the meals ( my go to is salad potatoes fish) and just get that?

So sorry about all the stress. more hugs

MFWannabe

wouldn’t you be better off doing an online shop?
You’re both so busy and shopping etc seems to fall on you; you should find ways to make things easier for yourself x

debtfreewannabe321

I always get online shops lately, but I missed all the slots for this week unless we wanted stupid o'clock at night (like the last slot around 11pm, no way!) so I grabbed a pizza on the way home and some chips.. unhealthy but quick and easy considering I've just been given the runaround for my HRT. I had the prescription so thought they could do it whilst I shopped. Got back after shopping and apparently the prescription had been sent through to another pharmacy already, so they said can you call them and get them to return it, so I did, line was awful, I was having conversations with two staff members who both picked up 😆 and I couldn't hear either (oh my gawd that hearing test best come back with a hearing aid for me I'm mutton and Jeff) so I had to leave Mr T and drive across the estate to the other pharmacy and then wait twenty minutes in a queue for the poxy HRT. Ugh. Got it though and it's all done until next time.

I ended up having to go in the office today which resulted in lovely lady actually turning into stressy ranty getting on my nerves and making me feel quite frayed. I'm already feeling fragile and I am prone to bursting into tears from nowhere just lately and I felt like that this afternoon..I was glad when she had to leave for a meeting. And I had an hour's quiet time to catch up on admin and also book off the morning off my (hopefully) hearing test.

I've just heard back from the counselling team too who want a chat before booking me in. Feel anxious about that. I feel anxious about everything just lately.

Newbie has most definitely gone off, as I called it, with MH issues. I think, personally, it's her playbook. She has alluded to this sort of thing happening in last two work places.

Ok I've sorted the appointment with counsellor to speak to them pre appointment.... tomorrow! So I will get an appointment booked in then hopefully.

Watty1

At least newbie is now not bothering you and if she is genuinely ill I hope she finds the help she needs.