Investing in Us: Holidays, Health, and the Road to £150k

daisy_1571

"I feel a failure ringing in to work sick and also ego says NO because, why should I?" 

Oh, didn't realise your work marks you out of 10 with a pass rate! Lol, sorry for the kindly meant but sarky comment 😆 , but the only thing you can fail is a test or exam with a numerical pass rate. You don't fail at work or life or family or anything else that I can think of. And no one can fail by needing a day off sick. So get your ego told to shut the f up 😆. Its not in charge of this. Your head is in charge of how well or unwell you feel.

And 'why should i?' I'm not even sure why you'd be asking yourself this let alone be able to come up with a reasonable answer 😆 You should because you don't feel well, because struggling through the work day then spending every night and weekend unable to live your normal life is no way to live, because when you are under constant stress by this person (who it appears is affecting everyone around her) it affects every other part of your life, because sometimes bosses and managers need to actually properly understand their employees are struggling, because this person is not worth one second of your thoughts but she's taking up way too much of your work and home life so you need a break from her bringing up issue from your past, because you are a grown up adult who is perfectly entitled to assess yourself as needing time and so on and so on

Please, do what you would advise a good friend to do. If you are fine then of course go in, but still be kind to yourself

dxxxx

beanielou

Can you please just slow down. You need to be resting 🤗

debtfreewannabe321

Morning all,

😆 Thanks @daisy_1571 that's me told 🙈🤣

@beanielou I didn't do much at all yesterday. I only went as far as the garden, took all day, in stints to do a patch of weeding and emptying out a very small greenhouse (which was mostly empty anyway- I was just de-spidering mostly 😆). No housework done. Oh I lie, I hung out a wash then brought it in later on. The first wash to be dried outside this year 😃. Also got a takeaway away last night as DP was exhausted from DIY and I was just exhausted from everything. So no cooking well aside from a basic lunch.

This morning DP and I finished a movie we abandoned last night. It was rubbish, just because it has an A lister name on the title doesn't make it good. Watched it with a cup of tea this morning and struggled to see it really as it was such a dark movie. Why do they make movies so dark these days 🤔!

DD had a sleepover over last night with a friend who left super early before we'd even got up, they were very quiet which is unlike DD and her usual sleepovers! Her BF has arrived just now and will take her to work meaning DP or myself doesn't need to do it 🙌🏻.

I did NOT order the food shop yesterday for collection I totally forgot 🙈. I have pennies left in the food account after raiding it for DIY materials so I will do a quick walk round the kitchen and look in fridge and freezer and see what I can rustle together for the week and then buy basics to add to it. I am paid tomorrow but I don't want to touch that money until April really...... Otherwise this time next month we'll be in the same place again.

It's grey and miserable out there today, so no gardening for me. I've watered my indoor plants Instead and pruned a couple with dead bits. I might swish the duster around the worst areas of the house later. But, equally, I might not.

I have a couple of games on my phone I downloaded when I was being paid to test a few. I've kept the best ones. And I find playing them is like a mindfulness exercise where I don't think about jobs in the house, work, or stress…so I've been playing one this morning and just chilling out. Nice lazy morning 🙂.

On my Facebook this morning on my memories from a job I must have quit about ten years ago...

So I am paying attention to the signs and advice. I've had a good think and I am going into work tomorrow, more for not wanting to let a student down than ego now which is a huge improvement on my mindset the other day 🙈🤣🤣. And I'm fully prepared to say no, I'm not well, when I'm there if I go downhill. What I have noticed is, I'm okay on a Monday and Tuesday, stress wise anyway. Wednesday when that woman starts her working week is when it all starts to go Pete tong. But anyway, I'm prepared with what to say to the right person and I will keep remembering the meme above in all of this....most of us are replaceable in our jobs. I choose to work because I don't like being stuck in the house all day. And it gives me a sense of self purpose. Even if my health struggles. I feel like I want to be home right now doing nothing but I know when I've done that a few months I'll slip into depression at being trapped in the house 🤔 I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place every time this happens. A job that I dictate hours would be better - this is why self employment worked so well for me before...but that's not possible at the moment. DP is working hard to set up a company and new businesses alongside his paid job. So once he has set something up and there is space for me to come alongside him I will quit working for others. I'm manifesting this as priority 🙂!

No brain glitches today or blips but head pain bordering on headache looms, but doesn't manifest. I went to sleep last night listening to a sleep story where I got to travel around the world, had some fantastic dreams after that and feel like I slept really well 🙂. So feeling better today than I did on Friday. I also stopped eating takeaway about half way through my plate as I intuitively felt I'd had enough salt and crap by that point. So no salt hangover feeling today either which is great.

Looking forward to shuffling some money around tomorrow and paying the next £400 off the mortgage.

debtfreewannabe321

Ok, I went to Mr L and sat in the car, looking around at all the people coming in and out, it was unusually busy, even for a Sunday afternoon. I looked at my shopping list, decided no, I'll get It all in Mr T rather than going to two shops and switched the car back on and left Mr L. Was super busy in Mr T too. Fruit and veg aisle looked like it had been ransacked 😳. I managed to get almost everything I wanted, had to find a couple of substitutes. I also got some cheap linen work trousers (well work & home) in black and they fit ok...I'll run them through the wash though to make sure they don't itch as they feel a little scratchy on. £100 spent on trousers and food together. £30 on diesel. Hopefully that will see us through until the new month starts. I felt dizzy and discombobulated again wandering around and had to stop a few times. DP thinks it's psychosomatic, I think it's diet - these symptoms are always worse after eating certain trigger foods, however, he might well be right to a certain degree but I don't think it's wholly that reason. I was glad to get home tbh.

DP is nearly finished with the garage it looks amazing and looks like we've built a log cabin in the garden Instead of a horrible concrete garage monstrosity. Need to clean the windows up and I think I'll get some window film for them to hide the mess inside the garage but that small job aside it's had a complete transformation already.

Even the underlayer with the batons makes it look better than just the plain. Horrid concrete looks 🤣 what do you think so far?

in_need_of_direction

it looks like it should be housing a sauna

debtfreewannabe321

@in_need_of_direction I wish. I could/ would cancel the gym membership then 🤣👋🏻

beanielou

Looking good.

dawnybabes

Such a transformation 🥰

daisy_1571

😆 Thanks @daisy_1571 that's me told 🙈🤣

😆🤣 😂 😹 all said with love and best wishes 😆 🤣 😂

DDx

daisy_1571

Wow, garage looks FANTASTIC

What a difference 👏 you definitely deserved takeaways after all that work

DDxx

(Ps yes get a sauna, £5000 down and you'd be saving 30quid a month straight away! Bargain 😆 😆)