Money Moral Dilemma: My partner eats more than me, so should he pay more of our food shopping costs?

JustKeepGoing_2

Relationships are about enjoyment of each other's company. They are not about balancing the economics. I am sure that you could generate a spreadsheet of the cost effective balances of each other's expenses but how will you eventually deal with illness, children or all the rest that life throws at us. 

gothvixen

You should probably create a spreadsheet itemising every expense outside of those that are strictly joint. I would also consider valuing intangible assets such as the joy and generosity you bring to the relationship, though there's always the danger his tolerance and forbearance will outstrip your side of the balance sheet. Don't have children, as you will no doubt create a pit of debt for him from which he would never be able to haul himself.

Mother_of_Many

You should also check if he is using more of the oxygen in the house than you and bill appropriately.

and toilet roll…. Do YOU use more when on a period? Should he bill you for that?

are you serious??? Utterly pathetic.

Paying half each for shopping? Never heard of this either. Sounds like something teenagers would do!

A marriage should be more than this. It’s not a business transaction. 

I feel sorry for him. Hope he finds someone kinder when it inevitably ends. Poor guy. 

[Deleted User]

My husband is 6’5” and I am 5’4”. He also eats a lot more than I do. Not that this worries me at all. However, you could try what we do - you pay all the other household bills (including his phone bill) and he pays for all the shopping - food, toiletries, household goods, etc, etc. I am several years older than my husband so now only work half the hours he does; therefore he also now pays all the travel and accommodation costs when we go away on holiday. This works absolutely fine for us. I can’t imagine either of us paying exactly half of everything, as it sounds like you both do. Apart from anything else, it must be a real hassle to keep having to work it all out every time one of you pays for something!! That would get on my nerves and to me it’s really not worth the effort.

Rd1994

Do you earn the same? I’m less concerned with how much my partner eats and more that he earns more so should contribute more. But maybe yes 

squirrel59

No. What's wrong with you?

PurpleGoldFish

You should divorce him. He’ll be happy for it 

LauAxon

We happily share as sometimes I put stuff in, sometimes he does.
However if it starts adding up extra for one of us, we'll chuck a bit more in because I don't want him paying for my shampoo etc if I get a more pricey one or if I was to regularly buy a bottle of vodka a week that would add up! 
Maybe do a joint shop then he buys top up shops out of his own money? 
It's hard to say without knowing how much he's spending extra than you & on what.

Shell1989

Does he earn more than you? And if yes, would he consider paying a proportion based contribution to your overall expenses? If he doesn’t earn more though (or if you earn more), and you’re contributing equally, then let it slide - otherwise if you start knit picking he might ask more of you, and that would be a unfortunate backfire.

Newbie_John

Measure each portion and write into a notebook.
Then at the end of the month calculate the total weight of food consumed for each of you divided by the total weight of food divided by both of you. 
Use that ratio to calculate amount of money each of you pays for shopping the next month.

Continue until you both start eating the same.