Money Moral Dilemma: Should our four-year-old child pay for her own extracurricular activities?

Hodgie

The four year old obviously took the trouble to book the activities so, of course, should pay.
The parents, however, if they asked this as a genuine question, need their own money for keeping them on whatever planet they're on.

Dizzybird_22

In my experience a four year old doesn't need to do many extra curricular activities,  they're 4 and get tired easily. The classes tend to be more for fun and I don't remember them being that expensive. (My kid is now 18). The daughter (or more likely the parents) need to choose what they can afford.

 They poster says should they charge the activities to her account? Most kids account don't allow withdrawals or payments out. If they do want to have assistance with the costs of activities,  perhaps they could ask relatives in the future "do you mind if we put this money towards x activity?" I have younger nieces and nephews, and I personally don't mind what the parents put the money towards,  as long it is to the benefit or entertainment of that child. 

MissSilver

Absolutely not. She will change her mind 1000 times until she's older and has settled on a suitable activity. Use your own money to guide and, if nessary, limit her choices

Friday1989

I gave my nephew swimming lessons for Christmas. He was not impressed because he just wants more toys 😂 (he has more than enough) but it's something he enjoys that his parents can't afford. I'm sure relatives would be happy to pay towards activities for birthdays and Christmas but it's probably better to ask them rather than just dipping into savings 

2702

No. You should pay for their activities. If you can not afford them then they do not do them. The money should be kept until they have an understanding of it's value.
What a question I thought I had heard everything.

strawb_shortcake

I don't usually read these but first thought was WTA....

No 4 year old would surely come up with that list of extra curricular activities without some strong encouragement. 

Your child, you pay for the courses you sign them up too, and most 4 year olds in school would find this schedule too tiring.

A family member said they were taking money out of their child's account to pay for a new bed (childs bed not parents), apparently they broke theirs at 18 months so it was right to come out of their account 🤬

Though I'd say this is a wind up, a 4 year old would go to Squirrels not Scouts, whilst it's semantics I don't think a parent would use the term "Scouts" for a four year old

annie469892

I think it boils down to your financial situation. If using the child’s own savings means that she can have opportunities and enrichment which she couldn’t otherwise, then use their money! If you can afford to let her savings build up, the money when she reaches 18 could be a substantial amount. You don’t know what your financial situation will be at that time. It was a godsend to our grandson who was leaving for Uni at a time when his parents were struggling financially. Try to hang on to it for her future if you can. 

Exodi

If I was the relative, I would not be happy.

It's also a bit of a slippery slope to start dipping into savings like that. If you ask her what she wants at a restaurant, do you bill her for her choice? Sounds ridiculous but there's very little difference.

Likewise, can you imagine in 10 years time when she comes to you and says "Nanny just told me she gifted me a couple of grand when I was younger and I really really really want to use it to get my first phone, but she said to not get my hopes up as you might be holding onto the cash for my first car instead?"

And you have to reply "Oh my dear naive child, that money is long gone! Do you remember all those constant extracurricular activities when you were little more than a toddler?"

"No?"

"Oh, yeah I guess you wouldn't. Well basicallyyyyy we signed you up to a whole raft of activities when you were really young and it ended up being super expensive so we decided to raid your savings to pay for it."

CapricornLass

No.  You should pay for these.  If you can't afford to pay for all her activities, then talk to her gently and simply, explain that Mummy and Daddy can't afford to pay for all of these things but you can afford for one/two activities, and which are the activities that she likes best, and that she won't be able to go to the rest.  Several important lessons here:  making a choice, understanding that you can't have everything, that money only goes so far.  She's not too young to start learning this.

Jami74

I'm quite impressed that a four year old has racked up a few grand in savings. I must have had really tight friends and family. We were pretty skint too so activities were very much planned and budgeted things and were cancelled at the first sign of disinterest.