The Diary Of Onebrokelady Aged 60 And A Half

Cherryfudge

Such an incredibly hard time, though I'm thankful the meeting was useful and you were able to speak and be heard. I'm very sorry your Dad has reached this stage. At least if he sleeps, he's not immediately present much of the time. I hope the purse turns up somewhere (could she have dropped it in the hospital?) but now the cards are cancelled, the damage is limited. It may be she's not thinking straight.

I really hope everyone gets the rest they need tonight, and there's a place for your Dad where he can be visited easily.

Hugs.

Onebrokelady

maggiem said:

Good to read there is a plan in place for your Dad and that your Mum realised she wouldn’t be able to cope with the care needed. I hope a suitable place can be found quickly. 

But oh dear, that phone call from your Mum, just too much on top of everything especially as you haven’t been well either. Fingers and toes crossed someone honest has found it and handed it in. 

Thanks I thought she was going to argue that she would have him at home but she realised it was too much. I really could have done without her losing her wallet, honestly she has three different ones for different things so she has her purse with her credit card in and some cash plus loads of other out of days cards she could throw away, then she has one with dads credit cards and cards for other accounts plus cash which is the one she lost and one with her bus pass and other cards that could probably thrown away. I was looking through one of them and she had her bus pass in there from 2022 😳 it’s no wonder her handbag is so heavy. I literally have what I need for the day in my bag and I clear it out at the end of everyday, I can’t stand loads of rubbish in my bag 

Onebrokelady

Cherryfudge said:

Such an incredibly hard time, though I'm thankful the meeting was useful and you were able to speak and be heard. I'm very sorry your Dad has reached this stage. At least if he sleeps, he's not immediately present much of the time. I hope the purse turns up somewhere (could she have dropped it in the hospital?) but now the cards are cancelled, the damage is limited. It may be she's not thinking straight.

I really hope everyone gets the rest they need tonight, and there's a place for your Dad where he can be visited easily.

Hugs.

I think Mum might have lost it in one of the taxis she went in but the second one she got was a cab you hail so no contact number to see if they found it. I don’t think she lost it at the hospital because she didn’t go into her bag. She might have dropped it on the bus and I’ve contacted them but I’m waiting for them to get back to me.

Onebrokelady

Today I’ve stayed at home to try and catch up on my washing and housework. I was supposed to have a man coming round to fix my bathroom tap but I cancelled him because I work up with a sore throat and headache this morning which felt like Covid but it’s gone again now. He’s now coming back on the 16th of October instead.
Ive got one load of washing done and dry and the second one in the machine and I have dusted the living room. Im just going to sweep the floors because they don’t need hoovering.

I’m meeting a friend for coffee tomorrow if I don’t have any symptoms that come back. I think I felt ill because I didn’t drink enough yesterday. I also need to contact my gp on Friday to request another fit note. I had an appointment with occy health last week and they agreed I’m not fit to work at the moment. 

I have very painful joints just about everywhere but my shoulders, arms ,wrists and hands are the worst. I also can only walk for between 30 minutes to an hour then my knees start to get really painful too. I also have really bad fatigue so I’m spending a lot of time asleep trying to recover from anything I’ve done. 

Seasidegal58

I'm so sorry to hear the latest news of your dad OBL and how you are feeling healthwise. 

I do hope your headache and sore throat go by tomorrow and you feel well enough to meet up with your friend. Should do you good. 🤞

millymolly22

So sorry to hear about your dad.  I went through the same with my mum and luckily she wasnt really aware what was happening.  We were given the option to have a look at suitable nursing homes so maybe you could call the ones nearest your mum to see if they have space.  Take care 

jwil

Sorry to hear about your Dad but glad there is a plan in place.

We found the same when dealing with a relative's handbag after they died - they were carrying hundreds of pounds in cash everywhere!

I hope you feel better soon.

badmemory

My friends wife died 18 years ago & when he was moving house 3 years ago they were still finding cash.  There was even some in a chest of drawers that had gone over the back & even something stuck to the bottom of a drawer.  That was when I said stop, you have to go through all these bin bags before they go.  We are talking 5 figures here and no-one has a clue where she got it from either, which doesn't seem to bother them but it would me.

foxgloves

Oh dear, OBL, what a lot you have to deal with at the moment. I remember when my Dad was at the palliative care stage. Apart from a week in hospital earlier in his illness, my Mum managed to look after him at home because he didn't want to leave her & go into a care home, but it was too much for her. I understand people wanting to end their days at home, but it is so difficult when the other partner has no medical training. Mum also struggled to see instructions on things like oxygen machines & tablets & was very stressed a lot of the time. I think it will be such a relief all round that your Dad will be getting the care he needs. The most important thing now is that he is kept comfortable & pain-free. 
It must be difficult dealing with this when you have the rift with your sister. Thankfully I didn't have that problem when my Mum & Dad were in their final stages, but with Mr F estranged from 2/3 of his family, I can see similar issues arising down the line. 
Sending sympathy, especially as you haven't been feeling at all well for a while yourself. It will be a stressful old time, but it will pass, even if it doesn't feel like it at the time. Take every opportunity you can to rest with a good book, watch an episode of something you've been wanting to catch up on or just have a little wander around the garden.
Best wishes,
F x

milann

I’m so sorry to hear the news about your dad. He will be better off being cared for by the home where the people are fit and able to take on all the things your mum would find difficult. I’m glad she admitted it’s too much for her, but I bet she’ll feel guilty and wants to do it all herself.i hope the wallet turns up 🤞
Rest as much as you can although it is difficult when you have so much on your mind. Sending lots of positive vibes your way.