Buying a little piece of Middle England; Manifesting my way to mortgage free.

debtfreewannabe321

In-laws arrived and walked straight to town yesterday! DP and I drove in and met them, we had a quick greet, catch up & chat and just happened to be stood outside DD workplace so we went in for a drink. We weren't allowed on her floor because it was closing but the manager let her come down to say hi 🙂. Fifteen minutes later she was at the table again in near tears. I took her outside and she started crying, some woman she works with had been really nasty to her shouting at her. DD doesn't do well with shouting 🙈. It turned out what really upset her though was the woman had gone to the manager calling DD all sorts of names from lazy uncooperative bad team player blah blah and DD had heard it all. DD said she'd said no to doing a job at that moment because she was already doing something else and she'd do it in a mo. The woman came screaming at her to get up there right now and do it. All I can say is it's a good job DD refused to point out which one was shouting at her because I would have been having words. DD is on around £7 an hour, is supposed to do the same job as the lady who's on NMW (£12 something) and yet the woman thinks she can boss DD around because of how young she is. She's continually making comments such as - you're young, you go up three flights of stairs to get X. You're young, you do this. Etc. YOU do the washing up because you're younger than me....pretty sure it's probably the same one that upset her last time. I don't actually blame DD for saying NO. She didn't appreciate this woman bad mouthing her though and I think that was what all the tears were. She said to me, If I have a problem with one of them I say it to them don't go straight to management...I said, valuable life lesson here dd, not everyone is like you and will act the same as you. 

I had to spend an hour talking her out of quitting saying she will come across this in life and you've got to deal with it. You could have it worse in another job. Go to the manager say your piece. Etc. she didn't quit.

 The manager messaged when I was in her room and asked if she was okay, said it was fine she left early and that they've okay'd her booked holiday. I said to DD it sounds to me reading between the lines he knows this woman is the problem. 

Anyway we'd left in laws in town they wanted to wander on their own. I said would you like to book around the cathedral/ castle/ gardens / other visitor places around here today or tomorrow and got my suggestion scoffed at with a NO 😳. Ah ok. Felt myself go red as if it was a silly suggestion and I shut up. They'd rather wander down the high street and look in m&s - to each their own. 
They're coming over in around an hour and I don't know what they'll want to do. But DP said she'd probably rather go for a walk than tourist thing, not sure DP dad gets much say 🫣. Anyway if they want to walk plenty of places here ...but I will stay home. My plantar fascitis is playing up. As is the dodgy knee that likes to dislocate randomly. If they choose somewhere I know there is lots of rest points I will go though. Hope they don't mind if I choose to stay here but I am unable to keep up with them (they walk for miles and miles everyday 😳). 
So overall we haven't seen them for that long really which is a bit of a shame but also understand they want to do their own thing. 
Anyway best get up, they're coming to see the extension and I best go tidy last night's bits up 😊.

Watty1

Poor DD   I read a really disturbing post on our village noticeboard about how the young were being treated in some of the cafes and shops in the village.     It seems endemic.  So sad.  

Enjoy the time you do spend " the rellies"

beanielou

Horrible woman. Glad DD stood up to her. Glad DD is ultimately ok. 

Jessy103

Poor DD, I think there's a common misconception that all young people are horrible, entitled brats and although there are a few like that, a majority are very polite and hard working. Sounds like this woman just has a chip on her shoulder and thinks the world is to blame for her problems so takes it out on everyone else! I hope DD sticks with it and holds her head high x

redofromstart

I would be very tempted to point out to the employers that age related remarks are a form of discrimination and that they are liable for remarks made by other employees, but in reality I would probably grit my teeth and point out the life lesson too. 

debtfreewannabe321

Thanks @Watty1 @beanielou @Jessy103 @redofromstart poor DD was so close to quitting but I did manage to talk her down....I also got her to check her calendar and sure enough, it is 'that time of the month' because she was literally hysterical at one point  ☹️🙈.

So yesterday we had horrid fog, and in laws turned up and wanted to go walking. I gave them a few choices and they decided on one, which thankfully had lots of rest stops so I went along too. The walk should, under clear conditions, take you to the top of a hill where there is a clear view of the cathedral and city...we couldn't see past the end of our noses we traipsed around looking for paths that had overgrown, I couldn't find my usual way in, it had changed in the year since I had last been...DP mum was like OMG DFW I thought you knew your way in and out.  I also couldn't find the stairs on one part of the walk- I mean the thick fog did not help! She moaned, a lot. I ignored it, mostly. I got us home about two hours later and they said what shall we do for dinner, I suggested some restaurants I knew would have tables at short notice but they wanted to eat in to save money 🙄 so I spent an hour and half on my feet chopping, peeling, cooking a shepherd-less pie whilst they all chatted. By the time I sat down my feet which hadn't been too bad all day were in absolute agony. They did a lot of interrogating us on every aspect of our lives and then left. I felt emotionally and mentally violated. I didn't sleep very well again last night so was super tired this morning. 
DP is away again already, for two nights this time, so was unable to drive me to work, so I took the car and parked somewhere free and walked the last five minutes in. Was an easy-ish day but I met with student early again and she was not wanting to take no for an answer when she asked me if I could spend lunch with her. She had to take no for an answer because I went off to the staff room, which I usually avoid for some peace and quiet and so as not to have to talk 'shop' but it was the only place she couldn't follow me. I had a long lunch so went into town and popped into a charity shop, was looking for some jumpers, bought four and some trousers. Two jumpers are going back they are shapeless and make me look like I am wearing a potato sack The trousers, my gosh, I put them on and nearly cried, I couldn't even begin to do the zip up. I put them in the bag to go back but mentioned to DD there is a tiny pair of trousers in there and for her to see if she wants them. Well, they fit her perfectly so the sizing is all wrong! They said a 14, and she is an 8 ....so that made me feel a bit better because I was beginning to feel like a heffalump  
I'll take back the two bits I don't want tomorrow, I kept a shirt and jumper for myself. I think DD will probably keep the trousers they are really nice. I have also ordered some bits from n3xt -basics cheap long sleeve t shirts that need replacing from last year and a navy jumper. 

I got home from work and DD came in shortly after me, we decided to do the gym/ swimming before we got too relaxed and couldn't be a55ed. So off we went, and were back and showered and in pjs by 5 bliss haha. Had leftover dinner from last night re-heated and I have settled down under a blanket with heating on low and an old movie.
Oh and I was in my element taking pics of mushrooms, plants and trees with DP mother behind me 'what do you want to do that for' moaning myrtle she was.....here is a pic I took maybe someone else here likes nature pics lol  

debtfreewannabe321

Oh and technically I have £642 in the EF now but I put it in the empty account connected to my current account. Almost enough to pay for all the plumbing work required ...I wonder when we will get to a point where the EF can remain the EF 🙈

KajiKita

DP mother sounds like flipping hard work! I love the mushroom picture mushroom 🍄 😊👏

Oh and the EF starts being the EF when the materials for the path …. Sorry, sorry the kitchen fix, stop being needed! 🙄😂😂

KK

greenbee

EF is being used to pay the plumber/electrician/carpenter/decorator/carpet fitter here... (some of it is budgeted for... EF will pay for whichever bills come in after the budget is gone!)

debtfreewannabe321

KajiKita said:

DP mother sounds like flipping hard work! I love the mushroom picture mushroom 🍄 😊👏

Oh and the EF starts being the EF when the materials for the path …. Sorry, sorry the kitchen fix, stop being needed! 🙄😂😂

KK

Ah no we have a path to do as well as a patio 😳🙈🤣