Watty's Awakening

Watty1

Heavy fog here today and so grey and damp that we decided to go out one of my fav cafe's for breakfast. Rosti, bacon and eggs and spinach for me. Delicious.

Sadly the Care Home called for the VNM mid breakfast so he left to go there. I called his daughter and asked if she wanted to be there and offered to drive her (as I firmly believe no one should drive when distraught) but her partner will go too.  I think it is likely his mum will pass today or tomorrow.   I have come home now to sit and drink a coffee, then muck the horses out and walk WattyDog and then see where we are and what to do next.

PennysIntoPounds

Sending hopes to all for a peaceful and painless passing, if that is what is occurring. Make sure to take extra care of yourself, these things can hit us even when we weren't close to the person, and VNM and his daughter are bound (and entitled) to be at times somewhat difficult as they navigate this x

Watty1

Thank you @PennysIntoPounds   The VNM came home an hour ago and said she has rallied a little but that the home think she will pass within the next few days.  We will pop in this evening so he can say goodnight and then he and his daughter have made arrangements to go tomorrow morning and have lunch with her.  Take each day as it comes now.

Chrystal

Thinking of you and VNM and hoping for a peaceful and accepted passing ((((hugs)))) XX

badmemory

Do they have meds for if things get difficult?  Do they need a district nurse to give them even if they are on the premises.  If so be ready to kick them, and this case I mean literally, into action.  My mum did & we were so taken up with the horror of what she was going through for 4 hours that we didn't think.  They should have called the district nurse in before they even called us.  VNM really does not need the memories I have.

daisy_1571

So sorry badmemory you have this particular bad memory.  

My late mil, we were called in, we played cds, talked to her about her life, rememberedfunny stories etc, she moved and appeared to be listening, rallied a bit.  Next day called in again, did the same, then she just....stopped. Thats the only way I can describe it.  So for that particular death, nothing to fear, nothing to be worried about but I count myself lucky of course.  Hoping, if its her time, it will be peaceful and vnm and daughter feel happy in their actions over last few years caring for her as best they could and can process it all.

Take care of yourself too in all this

Daisy xxx

savingholmes

Thinking of you both. Praying her passing is peaceful. 

Cherryfudge

You're all in my thoughts and prayers. I was with my Mum when she went and like Daisy's MIL, she just stopped, immediately after I'd called the chaplain over and he'd prayed with us. It's unlikely she knew he was there, though it was what she'd have wanted. May the VNM's mum have as peaceful a passing. 

And as people are saying, give yourself and those around you extra leeway if possible in this stressful time. Cut corners unless you need to be occupied. Keep phones charged, and maybe a grab bag with drinks, snacks, tissues and something to read in case there's waiting to be done. Could your nice neighbour feed the animals if you are called at short notice?

Watty1

Thanks everyone for posting a comment.    Some great ideas here.  I'm off in a bit with Charming Cob and neighbour so I will talk to her up for emergency horse care if needed.  She is a superstar and  know she will help

The  home do have emergency meds and have nurses on hand (one of the reasons this one was suggested) so that should be taken care of but I will remind them the meds are there in case in the Christmas faff these may not have been noted.  

The VNM and his daughter feel they can only cope with limited time visits now. They are both struggling in their own way.  Very hard being a bystander here, I make suggestions that I would use if it were my family then move on and make a coffee, I am learning to sit and watch and not interfere I suppose.

Suffolk_lass

That's hard too @Watty1, just sitting, watching and making a coffee, not interfering. Stay resilient yourself, it sounds as though your time will come when they are grieving after she has died. 

Superstar neighbours are to be treasured too!