2023 DECLUTTERING CAMPAIGN Mrs SD

Floss

QueenJess said:

....  No idea how I'm meant to be able to parent fully and work... it just isn't possible and don't know how other people do it. 

... I am now in bed and DH is about to deliver me hm apple crumble and hm ice cream*.

*both of which I made a few days ago.  No way DH could make them obviously...

I don't want to cause any friction, but wonder if you being so focused is actually allowing your DH not to be as focused? There is no reason why he couldn't make your ice cream as it is very very easy, and surely he could make a crumble - it is one of the first things taught to kids in cookery classes and there are YT videos online. 

vulpix

Hola. Just cooling down by the pool after a trot around Vigo. Nothing purchased but I was tempted by a Leah Stein alike jewellery shop. I brought a lot of jewellery with me and haven’t worn it all so I don’t need any more. 

 Brie, I thought Perfume was very well researched and a very unique idea. I can’t say that I enjoyed it but I am glad that I have read it. I have read a lot of books in my time and I don’t think I shall ever forget that one. 

 Welcome to the declutterati new joiners. 

 Bon voyage Mrs SD , bit by bit and any other globe trotters. 

 My favourite black sandals have broken. The top separated from the bottom as I was walking. I have only had them 12 years or so. I will take them home to see if I can glue them! 

I am also taking home used toiletry bottles to recycle. I am not sure that happens on a ship. When we are in port all the rubbish is just collected in a truck. 

 Queen Jess. As others have said be as kind to yourself as you are to other people. ❤️

 Good news that Mr Siebrie has made it home. I am sure being away so long will help him see what he’s been missing. 

 Love to all Vx 

 

QueenJess

Wow - thanks for everyone's good wishes.  I got some more sleep last night, but still tired as I woke up early (probably worried about work).  Not feeling as despondent as yesterday though.

Siebrie said:

@QueenJess Does husband step up? Does he do baby-nightshifts? Does he know how to deal with a sick child? Maybe you can take turns looking after a sick child, one night you - the other night him. Does he do his share of housekeeping? If he's not a confident cook, maybe persuade him to make 1 or 2 dishes properly and 'let' him cook them at least once a month/fortnight (you tell him it's because you look forward to them; in reality it's so you have a break and he keeps the routine).

It's a constant bone of contention that he is blissfully unaware of sick children.  I got him to check on DD's temperature many a time and he said she was absolutely fine.  I went in minutes later and found she was not just too hot, but dangerously hot.  It's not rocket science, but DH just doesn't seem to understand when I try to explain it to him.  It means I always have to do the night shifts when they are ill and it's really irritating.  I would love to share, but just can't trust his judgement.

I did teach DH to make spag bol years ago and now it's "his dish" that he makes and I never make it anymore.  I also make him do fish and chips as it's easy and scrambled eggs.  I normally tell him you are making X tonight.  He just has zero imagination and left to him, we would eat the same 3 things on rotation with a distinct lack of cooking from scratch (that I love the taste of) or much veg (not an exaggeration as this is what happens whenever I'm ill).  Plus never any snacks or desserts, which is just not any fun!  When I cook it means we can all eat well and I can make all the things I love.  I do make DH do all the washing up, stacking the dishwasher and wiping the sides, however, he doesn't do washing up regularly enough and I frequently have to wash things up that I need.  He also rarely wipes the sides and I really hate coming down in the morning and prepping food/eating breakfast on a dirty side/table.  It's very irritating.  Left to me, I would do it every night.  I have mentioned it, but he just says he'd rather do it in the morning.

To be fair I generally do love cooking and baking and finding new recipes.

Floss said:

QueenJess said:

....  No idea how I'm meant to be able to parent fully and work... it just isn't possible and don't know how other people do it. 

... I am now in bed and DH is about to deliver me hm apple crumble and hm ice cream*.

*both of which I made a few days ago.  No way DH could make them obviously...

I don't want to cause any friction, but wonder if you being so focused is actually allowing your DH not to be as focused? There is no reason why he couldn't make your ice cream as it is very very easy, and surely he could make a crumble - it is one of the first things taught to kids in cookery classes and there are YT videos online. 

It's probably a good point.  DH always says that he will do whatever I ask (although in reality not always very timely.... I've been waiting for him to put the mirror on the wall for 4 years!), but it's the constant mental load that I find tiresome.  There are huge blanks that just never occur to him.

Left to DH he would buy everything needed, never buy dessert (as apparently he isn't bothered) and never make anything from scratch.  I love food and I feel rubbish eating his way.  He is just slightly lazy with it as he isn't quite bothered enough to do it himself, but he does like eating my food.  I actually love cooking/baking, so I think the answer is he does more other stuff and I should up his repertoire of food a bit.

DH is slightly miffed he gets no cooking for lunch.  I made myself a hummus, carrot and radish pitta bread (made the hummus myself) and I know he hates hummus, but I love it.  He knows the deal... I will make what makes sense from what we have/what I want and am happy to make twice as much.  But if he doesn't want it, he can make his own!  I had greek yogurt with red grapes and melon for afters.  Feeling slightly virtuous, so I will be able to have my lovely hm lime cake later whilst work is stressing me out!

Edit: I should say that to be fair, he does more than his fair share of dropping off/picking up of the kids for school/nursery to give me more time.

Happy_Kitties

*234-244 items x 11 into the rag bag and dropped off
*245 broken mug binned- it bounced down the stairs quicker than the stairlift!
*246 large donation of pet food dropped off for the local animal shelter 

There is something else but I can’t remember!

Brie

Seeing this thread reminded me that the food bank (that does more than just food) is looking for a number of old phone chargers.  I know we had quite a few and I've looked in one of the obvious spots and can't find any in there.  There's lightbulbs of various sorts, a couple of extension cords, stick on hooks and a pack of glass wipes.  Nearby there is one drawer completely empty except for an extension cord and another drawer empty except for some random screws, 2 salt dishes and 2 pairs of OH's reading glasses. And my last 2 mobile phones.

I've reorganised and will, at some point, go and look in the next obvious place for phone chargers (carport, box full of various electrical cords and likely a number of spiders) 

Liverpool_Anne

Hi all, home from my travels. Had a really lovely time, great hotel, scrummy food and lovely to see dniece and her DH. I will post some pics tomorrow The trip was marred however by my half falling half slipping off a step just before we were leaving and I have done something to my ankle. Luckily OH can drive my car as I couldn't manage the last 90 mins. I am now in bed as it is nearer to the toilet and I can just about hobble there with the aid of a walking stick. I have an appt at the orthotic clinic tomorrow which OH can take me to and if it's not better I will go to the walk in which is in the same building.
Before I left the kitchen bin and recycling were emptied, the bedroom bin and bathroom bin was emptied and the lr recycling was emptied. We also took with us 2 gifts for dniece and her DH as we never see them for Christmas or their birthdays sadly.
@QueenJess, be kind to yourself, nobody can be a full parent and work full time. All anyone can do is their best which you do every day, hugs

I have taken a couple of painkillers and am falling asleep so I will say hugs to anybody who would like one.
1278 kitchen bin
1279 bedroom bin
1280 kitchen recycling
1281 bathroom bin
1282 lr recycling
1283 + 1284 gifts delivered
Take care everyone
1284/2023

~FlowerPot~

hello lovelies, the days are whizzing by.

Mrs SD ~ i love hearing about your trips and all the wonderful food you have

wednesdays here means DS1 cooks. so every week we have pasta/ sauce/ garlic bread. Each type can vary but it its very often the same. i dont  care as im not cooking whoopeee!!! however he is off to uni in a couple of weeks and my weds night off will come to an end. boo!! i think its time to make it DS2s turn to practice his cooking skills!!

managed a few frogs today. nt heard a whiser regarding the huge toad i sent off a few weeks ago. i do hope that will go through soon.

DD is managing really well at the home ed centre. i am so pleased. i have everything crossed that it continues to work out. Although its alot of extra driving and waiting its lovely to see her coming out happy. it was all about the Roman gods today!

Florenceem

Today was SA so we were busy serving and helping.
Came home and had a visit from DGd and DGs.
Next it was off to the Dr for Mr F. He did a stool test last week and yesterday the surgery phoned to say that the Dr wanted to see him today. They found blood in the specimen so he is being referred to the hospital.
I have a Dr's appointment tomorrow - so we are there again.

EnergyShifter

Tasks:

- reorganised under stairs cupboards
- reorganised storage in bedroom

IN (running total 165) 

166.  Heated airer

OUT (running total 526) 

527. Instruction manuals 

528. Poison tray left by pest control

529. Trousers

530. Old towel - dusters

weenancyinAmerica

@Liverpool_Anne - You sound like me - I have come home from England three times in wheelchairs. Once I fell backwards off a kerb when the fire department came racing up to where I was, once stepping off the bottom step of the stairs on a plane in the Edinburgh airport in the rain, and once due to a bus accident in Stratford upon Avon when the bus I was on ran into the train station. I used to take tour groups and claimed I was checking out the medical facilities in case any tour members needed to use them. That's my excuse anyway.