Diary of a 30-something idiot

leftatthetrafficlights

@foxandflowers - I've read the whole of your diary today and didn't want to read and run....I'm not going to comment on your dh - you know what is happening and will do what is appropriate for you (regardless of how healthy the choice is) but I do want to remind you that no-one is worth making yourself unhappy for.

We all go through tough times, if the relationship is strong and worth the investment then we weather those storms (I've been with my dh for over 30 years and not all of those have been filled with unicorns and rainbows!) but if we know deep down that the happiness is much more fleeting than the sadness and frustration then we owe it to ourselves and those around us to be honest and find another path - a short relationship filled with love is better than a lifetime relationship without it and we all deserve to be happy and respected.

I truly hope you find your happiness soon - life is far too short to neglect our wellbeing, regardless of external difficulties, our home should be our place of serenity, safety, sanctuary and love. 

foxandflowers

Honestly am amazed that people would want to sit down and read my entire diary. I can't be that interesting surely!!

Four days until payday! Still very excited to get my pots up and running :]

I stripped the paint off my stairs yesterday. It took me nine and a half hours to do it all, and it looks awful. Like I almost wish I hadn't started it. But I have a mouse sander arriving today, so I am hoping once it's sanded down it will be better - it's pine so not awful quality, but it had at least nine layers of gloss paint on top of the wood. (I am not exaggerating) and one of the early layers was a wood stain that's left everything weirdly magenta. I want to paint it black, and I suppose I could have just painted over it, but that feels like a job half done. 

I booked in my kitchen with the bird company. The guy who came out was lovely, he got it in under budget, and I've got everything I wanted, including the Belfast sink I've dreamed of since I was 14...  Here is a render of how it will look (minus spotlights and the new floor, because I can't be dealing with changing the light fittings that drastically - just getting rid of the fluro tube light will be enough). The tall cupboard is a built in fridge freezer, and I have a gas hob, which I know may be more expensive than induction, but makes much better steaks in my opinion. Under 10k including appliances, and a built in dishwasher. 



Next step is going to be learning how to strip wallpaper off the walls. We have anaglypta on the ceilings, so I will try and clean that up/repaint? but if I can't, I think I will need a plasterer? Booo. 

Windows are booked in for the front of the house, and I have a roofer who thinks he can get hold of the necessary tiles to fix my roof. We have a tonne bag of topsoil arriving this week to level out the garden. Progress is being made (if not financially, everywhere else at least!!) 

Debsnewbudget

Kitchen looks lovely.
you can remove wallpaper fairly easily and then see if you need to plaster.
we use a wallpaper steamer  but have in the past used a bucket of soapy water and sponge to wet down the walls then a wallpaper scraper to scrape it off.  The steamer works faster.
sometimes its best to put score marks in the paper first so the water/steam can soak in better.
good luck. 

Baileys_Babe

That kitchen looks fan.

I feel your pain regarding stripping off the stairs. When we renovated the we stripped the very many layers of paint off our balustrade followed by sanding and then finished with wax. It is now a thing of beauty and has been admired a lot. I am so glad we did it but boy it was a frustrating job.

foxgloves

Hi @foxandflowers - Kitchen looks fab. I insisted on a Belfast sink when we had our kitchen fitted (several years ago now). I haven't once regretted it. We grow quite a bit of food & it's so nice to have the space for washing off big bundles of produce. It's good for handwashing too - not that I do much of that, but as a knitter, I do have a few items which require it. The only thing we weren't used to when we we new to it, was now many crocks & glasses we would smash! We soon learned to be more careful & (touch wood!) I think there has only been one broken item so far this year.
We also have that annoying anaglypta style wallpaper on a couple of ceilings. It does seem to discolour, doesn't it, especially if the previous owner was a smoker, but even during our 2020 - 2022 refurb, we couldn't run to getting them stripped & re-papered as our decorator thought that with us being in an older property (1930s), the ceiling could be in a bit of a state underneath. So we agreed that he would paint them, which is what we had already done 2 or 3 times since we moved in. I loathed the textured ceilings when we moved in, but once vacuumed thoroughly & painted a nice clean white, I stopped noticing them. Sometimes it can be better living with something clean & bright, but imperfect, rather than run the risk of uncovering another load of problems & wishing we'd left well alone.
In view of your financial situation, do remember that you don't need to do everything at once. We had a lot of debt when we moved here 21 years ago, with the LBM arriving halfway through, & we are now completely debt-free. Even though we were big users of credit, we knew we were unable to get all the work our house needed done at once. Refurb work always costs more than expected as other problems are uncovered along the way. We began refurbing it the year after we moved in & did it gradually. It was not finished until the last 2020 -23 phase. If we had tried to do it all at once, I honestly can't imagine what our debt total would have looked like. So I think getting it watertight with a hygienic kitchen is a good sensible start. The less essential stuff can be done more gradually. If it's feeling like a 'forever home', then it isn't a race. You can take your time & re-assess after each stage.
Hope your budget is coming along & your 'tough love' is having an effect. Be strong. You need to work as a team on this & that means equal input & workload, as you know.
What a long post.....I only popped on to say 'fab kitchen'!
F

24ta

I love the kitchen. Well done on removing the paint in the hall, a big job but it will look so much better. 

I hope work is better this week. 

Sarahwithlove

Kitchen looks fab. Glad you're getting what you want. 

How is work situation? Please make sure you reach out to occ health for help and speak up about what's going on. Does your work have any support services? 

Debsnewbudget

How are you doing? 

Hope work is OK 

Humdinger1

Yes how are you @foxandflowers? Sorry if I sounded gruff last time I posted...together with many others  here, I want you to know that you have a huge value; and not as an enabler of unhealthy habits in others either.  Love Humdinger xx 

Debsnewbudget

You must be devastated about the new dog restrictions sending hugs xxx