NST JOYFUL JUNE

abundant1972

Good Evening 🌒

Fairly quiet few days - still no NSD (tut tut) but will try for one tomorrow!!! Managed to get some steps in so feeling good about that... though the old diet needs some work still...!!! Just a quick check in for me today as it's late...

Today I am grateful for:
1) The sunshine and my walk
2) For having hot and cold running water
3) A call from my brother which cheered me up

Night all x

f0xh0les

Morning Turtles! Happy Saturday (the days are running into each other with this half term and jublee stuff).

Today I will be going to a festival at the side of a river.  It is called The Riverside Festival.  It must have taken them ages to come up with that name.

 5 out of 6 of us want to go.  Hooray!

Weather forecast cloudy but dry. Hooray!

What could possibly go wrong?

mothernerd

Hugs for DawnW, wishus and anyone else who needs or wants one. My life is definitely challenging atm. Yesterday I got myself downstairs ready for a day of cooking/ freezing/ storing/ using veg from my recipe box and veg boxes. Found the bag wirh the tins of paint had been knocked over, the lid had come off one tin and a paint puddle had formed, mostly inside the bag and some on the floor. Luckily the 'painting dress' I'd thrown down for washing was to hand so moved the bag with the tin into the yard, poured as much as possible back into the tin, put the lid back on and used the painting dress to mop up the floor, followed by a couple of sheets of kitchen paper (last roll from mum's, it's not something I buy).

Planned early morning trip to little Arseda was just before 10 am - the deserted streets and no mums with kids to dodge reminded me that it might be a BH. Bought drinks, some to replace the ones I borrowed from Beloved, some to take away - the caffeine free drink is hard to source (have got into the habit of packing a couple of large bottles in my suitcase when i go away) and need some in my food and drink selection to take with me on the epic adventure (going to N Wales for my ex's funeral). As a bonus I scored 3 boxes of falafel off the ys pile. Also got cash from the machine for my brother.

Came back home, cooked one of the recipe box meals with several substitutions (they gave me tenderstem broccoli which I can eat raw so can go in my travel food pile and I had a cauli that's been in the fridge for 3 weeks +, it was fine but better cooked than raw). Probably should have left the maple syrup out (never had it before) and substituted ys mango and a can of butter beans (which turned out to be chick peas but the can was open) for their fresher/ in date ingredients. ??Does harissa always have apricots in?? or are there other varieties. Have had a bad reaction to apricot kernel in a body lotion previously so was wary. tried a tiny tip of my finger spot on my tongue first before adding it to the dish. Told DS3 if my tongue and throat swelled he should tell the ambulance people that was what it was. He told me his phone would probably kill me by taking too long to charge up - told him to use mine. Apart from that, liked it.

That dish was done before lunch so had a little bit and divided the rest between two freezer boxes (another early morning purchase - they're doing a set with multicoloured lids, have bought some but the only ones to hand were in the dishwasher, clean but not dry). Made another recipe up - 3rd one I pulled out one which had 2 missing ingredients - they're in the fridge but wasn't pulling everything out, decided they'd turn up as I went along. Added extra veg wherever I could. Many trips back and forthwith recycling and rubbish and a bit more work done outside.

In between I looked up accessibility of the train stations I would be using, Wigan fine, Crewe fine, Abergele unmanned - train conductor would provide assistance. Looked up 'Passenger Assist' facility, wrote the details down but wanted to back and jot down the times of various trains. DS2 messaged to ask when I was leaving on Sunday - told him Saturday for Crewe, then had to explain. I've made my own travel arrangements as I didn't want the boys worrying about me on top of everything else they have to do but I hadn't really thought through humping luggage about (I do travel light and I love travelling by train but last time I could still use a rucksack easily) and factoring in an overnight stay and that the CPAP machine weighs more than all my clothes put together.

Was tiring by late afternoon so just threw together a veg curry using up ys bargains and excess bits. I cheated and used one of mum's jars of sauce but it took about 10 minutes in total including going back to stir it twice. Still more to deal with but will try to cut down by bulk cooking (swede, sweet potato - already chopped earlier in the week and carrot mash in a big pan rather than carrot mash using 2 carrots which didn't work anyway - will throw the yummy nut milk yoghurt into the big pan when I'm mashing) and picking out things like rocket and watercress which can go in the travel food pile.

BH screwed up my shopping plans - asked if they still had boxes of masks when I was at the counter in B00ts on Wednesday but was too tired to go back to the other end of the shop for them, so will lose a further no spend day (actually it's medical and so are the dressing pads I want). The 2 packs I'm finishing off came from HB and of course they're still refurbishing (I'm expecting marble floors the length of time it's taken them).

Also started a small (ish) cardboard box for any toiletries/ medical stuff I want to pack and I'm dropping them in as i think of/ come across them. Going to take several use ups and may take use up books as well - stuff that's worth a read but won't want to keep forever so can be dropped off at a cs or hotel reading shelf.

Grateful for some lovely recipes (even if it's time consuming and my chopping arm is complaining), talking/ messaging with my sons, being semi-organised and will hopefully have a freezer full of food to come back to. 
 

mothernerd

So today - I'll be inspiring later. Woke earlier than ever - was around 3am when I did the time check because getting back to sleep wasn't happening. A mixture of pain (mainly my left leg but lower back and other places too) and things going round in my head - not really fretting but just an endless list of things to do. read for a long while, then painkillers, adjusting all my pillows and finally dragging the quilt back off the floor (have been fine with just a bedcover but it was cold and I could reach/ manoeuvre to pull the window to) helped me drift off.

Woke between 6 am and 7am, very dizzy and disorientated, felt seriously unwell, various head aches. Used both hands on doorframes etc to get to the bathroom, sat on my stool to brush my teeth and then sat for a further 10 minutes before i felt safe to move. Cleaned the sink, as much of the wall beside it and the grubby bits of the doorframe (where I grab it all the time to steady myself or pull myself up) whilst waiting. Laid my head on the sink and reconsidered the whole trip. However I've decided to do it, I want to do it and I will do it. So got myself back to bed, took my morning pills, ate some crackers (very hungry which might have caused the dizziness), 3 glasses of water, 1 first of all, 1 with pills, 1 with crackers, wrote everything down for UC/PIP then put my mask on as I felt myself drifting towards sleep.

10-33 am properly awake, dizziness receding but still there in the background (more items added to packing list). Another bathroom break, brushed my teeth again, made it downstairs to collect food, stopped 3 times on the way back up. Ate breakfast, stopped 1/2 way through to breathe, use moisturiser, hydrocortisone on the patch on my elbow, scraped soil from my fingernails.

Put on the laptop to start the day (but staying where I was until I can do the rest of my morning routine and felt okay to try the stairs again - brought extra food upstairs the first time).  My Train is cancelled (!!**$$ bleurgh).

Looked for other options - all trains either full or cancelled, 3 already departed. Claimed refund. Couldn't reach DS2 by phone or messenger, messaged darling d-i-l (DS1's wife, DS1 is super stressed so avoided him) to say my train was cancelled, looking for other options but if DS2 contacted them message was Don't Panic, Always carry a Towel and Wear the Lilac. Checked bus options (well they all told me train was quickest and easiest but those are mythical trains, unicorn trains in an alternate universe). They want me to bus hop to Ashton-i-M, then to St. Helens, then to L'pool and then to Abergele. I think the simplest option - here to L'pool, then L'pool to Abergele is no longer available and the bus departs every day at 16.10pm so I would miss my spa session and massage.

DS2 phoned me back. He suggested that he could either run me to Abergele very early tomorrow (he would then come back to his, his Beloved is doing the drive to Abergele with DS1 and his wife from 11 am - not taking 2 cars because DS2 thinks he might get very drunk at the wake) or because I have a bed in Crewe tonight he could take me there tonight and then I could continue as before in the morning. He also complained about DS1 - DS1 told me not to take on everything and then complain that no one was helping. DS1 is snatching back control, even after joint decisions have been made and reacting badly to suggestions or offers of help. Told DS3 he might end up keeping the peace between them.

Agreed I would explore further transport options and will decide which it is to be around tea time. Bus from Manchester to Abergele is at an inconvenient time. No bus route from Crewe to Abergele. Decided if they cancel the Sunday train tomorrow morning I do not want to be stranded in Crewe with zero transport options, so phoned DS2 back and will go with him in the morning at whatever time is best for him.

Have now had a sit down in front of the sink wash (hair wash will have to wait), washed my mask and hose (going to use mask wipes for the next few days) and eaten more of my supplies. Want to go out for a box of masks at some point (I have 3 in the drawer, can't remember if I still have a few at mum's or if I brought those back). And deal with some of the stuff (food being a priority). Will get dressed and go downstairs soon (4pm target). Aiming for a slow no stress day - what's left of it. Any progress is better than none. 

Looking for the little rainbows - I get to spend quality time chatting with DS2 on a road trip, DS3 and myself are in harmony (he moved the box that's been there nearly 6 months off the landing and I've got them looking at their possessions with 'if it's not worth boxing up and taking to a new place, pass it on to someone who will love it NOW), this is the start of a new adventure, the first of many in my new life and I am going to have fun and enjoy myself.

mothernerd

Sunday 4th June 2022
 And suddenly you just know it's time to start something NEW and enjoy the MAGIC of New Beginnings.

Deni_debt-free_dreamer

Hi mothernerd
A lift tomorrow with DS2 sounds the easiest option than planes, trains and automobiles - I know it's not quite that but it sounds very convoluted!
Love to you and your DSs and their beloveds xx

f0xh0les

I hope it doesn't turn into a  'many days trek across desert' experience, but sometimes it feels like it!

Take the offer of a lift with DS2 , and have an adventure.  He might 'only' be an ex, but it is still stressful mothernerd.  He was the father of your children and you worry about them worrying about him. Plus it is coming on the back of grannynerd's death and all the work that brings you, plus probate...  You are having a lot chucked at you right now, on top of your dieting, and health worries. 

So cut yourself some slack please.

Accept all help offered.

Helping you will make them feel better, so you are doing them a favour.  They cope better when they are given a task to do.

And enjoy that spa!!

apple_muncher

Blimey, mothernerd! I'm amazed you're not a gibbering wreck in the corner!!

Hope it does go smoothly, that you do get your spa stuff, and that you have some fun, living la vida loca in north wales (despite the reason why you are all there)

Today I am grateful for seeing my gym friend to pass on a message, for dh getting the fence panel back in place so we're not quite so exposed to the neighbours, for the bunting out the front still fluttering around, for a walk with a friend this afternoon, for being able to earn some extra pennies.

Amazingly, I'm on 4 NSD and 4 exercise sessions so far!

pollyanna_26

i don't drink alcohol Mn the toxic ex put me off it for life .

I'll raise a glass of my favourie Fentimans in a glass bottle Rose Lemonade to New beginnings and starting something new, You can do it and you need to be better when your little GD enters the world. I have three adult dds and one son and I know which were the hardest work growing up,

pollyx

Deni_debt-free_dreamer

Evening turtles

Been spendy the past 2 days.  Met a friend for coffee yesterday, my treat, as she is leaving work and I can't go to her leaving do.  Also bought a scented candle for DD1's birthday.
Didn't feel great in the afternoon so didn't do much.  Went to bed early with my book.  Put blankets over the curtain pole to block out the light as I keep waking up at 6am and feel really tired!   This strategy worked and i slept in till gone 8am this morning.  Today I have done some house chores, PT work, SM shop, had a walk and got washing dry.

Love Deni