Debt and Caring

stymied

@WelshmansDaughter hope all is well

WelshmansDaughter

It has been a while since I last posted, apologies. The last three weeks have been pretty horrible thanks to an incident at work the week of my dad's anniversary. I did a minor stupidity and ended up being blamed for something much bigger. It was resolved when the main manager returned from holiday but the stress really got to me. I ended up back on medication for my stomach and then capped it with a tummy bug.

I have had no tea or cakes for nearly a week that is how serious it has gotten.

It has shaken me up and made me see how bad my moods have been. And how little energy I have, physical or mental, to pursue any of the things I have been trying to do.

I have work to do on my priorities but I am focusing on sleep and mood

in_need_of_direction

they sound like good priorities to start with. Take care

stymied

Sorry to hear things have been rough :( I agree sleep makes the most difference to everything. Hope your tummy accepts tea and cake again soon x

Cherryfudge

Agree with the above - look after yourself and the rest will have to wait. It's horrible when something amiss happens at work, I'm glad you were properly vindicated by senior management but it must have been very unsettling.

PennysIntoPounds

That sounds like a torrid time, glad you're focusing on how to prioritise you now

WelshmansDaughter

Thanks all.

It was quite bad, there were sleepless nights. I even printed my notice letter to bring in. But one of the worst parts (aside from now having to work with dodgy colleagues) was thinking that I would be stuck there because I couldn't get a reference.

I have been working on what I want to do next. Unfortunately I seem to have lost the ability for sustained concentration and my thoughts are all over the place. Hopefully that will improve with better sleep.

I have gotten an online job which I have started this week. I am starting slow and doing an hour a day to get myself into it without getting overloaded.

I also went to meet a family for a potential care job. On paper it sounds ideal and I really liked it when I was there but something is holding me back. There is a niggle, perhaps it is financial but I'm not sure.

I bought my tricycle only to discover it is too big for the front door. I did manage to get it in the house eventually which involved me climbing in the bedroom window. So I will need to get storage for the garden to fit it as well as widen the path so I can get it in and out.

PennysIntoPounds

That's horrible, work should not do that to someone. Have you received support from a manager at all? If not, maybe casually raise it as I'm sure they don't want to lose staff!

They legally can't give you a bad reference as far as I know, they can only say facts, and the facts are you turn up and do your job.

You don't need to make any life decisions after an upset, definitely focus on sleeping well

Online job sounds interesting, well done for finding another income source!

Do report back after a good night's sleep what you think is the niggle, good to mull these things over

Do you want the tricycle enough and is it MSE enough to justify getting garden storage and widening the path?

WelshmansDaughter

Good night's sleep PiP? What is this phenomenon you speak of?

The tricycle is already here and living in the hall. The path widening is necessary anyway as it is currently quite narrow and tends to get overgrown quickly. Garden storage would be helpful for many things, not least making things look tidier both in the flat and garden. However I may be able to keep it in the house which would be preferable from a security point of view.

As ever it all comes down to time. And money. And the problem with the job I do is that it exhausts me to the point that I find it very difficult to do anything else. I am trying to live with a rock bottom brain, there is very little in reserve. It does make the day to day more real but makes it hard to plan. I also want very much to leave now and that feeling is getting in the way.

Thankfully I can follow instructions so I am putting things into goblin and generating a list to help keep me organised.

I have been off tea and cakes now for nearly two weeks. The temptation for tea has been quite strong this morning. It's funny, I can identify the feeling I want to get from it and that is helping me not go for it. I think the detox phase should probably last a bit longer. I have pretty much just replaced cakes with fruit.

liselle

Can you have de-caff tea?