A previous owner refuses to stop using our address for EVERYTHING!

Mojisola

arghhhh said:

We have spent thousands on fencing and gates and security, but she uses the missing letters and parcels as an excuse to come into our garden and enquire, usually leading to her getting angry.

Are you letting her in through locked gates?

arghhhh

HampshireH, sorry I wasn't implying that you meant I should go out and antagonise her, that's just my reality. I don't own a mobile and I have very young children with me on my own throughout the day, so don't feel safe. She drives a really big pick up truck and because I feel she is unstable, I don't want my story to end with us getting rammed or anything like that. We're in a rural area, we have no immediate neighbours, but a neighbouring farm have had similar issues with her, but not the address thing. She like to lock up people's animals (another thing that the police won't deal with) and have loud arguments. Otherwise, it's very peaceful here, which was the appeal and the reason we moved counties and left everyone and thing we knew to live here. As we are the 'newbies', we haven't spoken about our issues with her to anyone around here, but we have heard stories from others. This house was in a very bad state and we have spent a lot of time and money restoring it. We plan to be done this year, but I would like to enjoy the house now that it's nearly done. I'm not talking about wallpaper and paint - we had to rewire and replace ceilings and floors. We have only just got a full floor downstairs as of last month.

arghhhh

Mojisola, we're in a rural property and when we moved in the understanding for the postman was that he'd post letters and parcels in a post box that was attached to our fence. We removed our post box to stop her helping herself, but then the postman started giving her the mail instead of walking down our path. Our path is a normal length path. That postman has since been replaced and we do get mail to our door now. If I lock our gates I'd get no post at all. The post can come at any time between 9am and 3pm, plus parcels come at any time of day.

Emmia

arghhhh said:

HampshireH, sorry I wasn't implying that you meant I should go out and antagonise her, that's just my reality. I don't own a mobile and I have very young children with me on my own throughout the day, so don't feel safe. She drives a really big pick up truck and because I feel she is unstable, I don't want my story to end with us getting rammed or anything like that. We're in a rural area, we have no immediate neighbours, but a neighbouring farm have had similar issues with her, but not the address thing. She like to lock up people's animals (another thing that the police won't deal with) and have loud arguments. Otherwise, it's very peaceful here, which was the appeal and the reason we moved counties and left everyone and thing we knew to live here. As we are the 'newbies', we haven't spoken about our issues with her to anyone around here, but we have heard stories from others. This house was in a very bad state and we have spent a lot of time and money restoring it. We plan to be done this year, but I would like to enjoy the house now that it's nearly done. I'm not talking about wallpaper and paint - we had to rewire and replace ceilings and floors. We have only just got a full floor downstairs as of last month.

Why don't you have a mobile? I'm not sure that I wouldn't have something that could be used to record her (video or audio only) or potentially used to call the police if needed. 

I'm sorry you're in this situation, I'd just keep returning to sender - and although expensive and inconvenient, I'd consider a PO Box for a year to avoid all mail arriving.

Mojisola

arghhhh said:

Mojisola, we're in a rural property and when we moved in the understanding for the postman was that he'd post letters and parcels in a post box that was attached to our fence. We removed our post box to stop her helping herself, but then the postman started giving her the mail instead of walking down our path. Our path is a normal length path. That postman has since been replaced and we do get mail to our door now. If I lock our gates I'd get no post at all. The post can come at any time between 9am and 3pm, plus parcels come at any time of day.

Could you keep the gates locked and have a bell outside for the posties and delivery drivers?

As Emmia says above - in your situation, I would consider a mobile essential.

arghhhh

Emmia, I don't like phones. I'll use one if I absolutely have to, but I don't like them. I'm autistic, that's the best way I can explain it. My husband and older children do, just not me. We have a landline.

Emmia

arghhhh said:

Emmia, I don't like phones. I'll use one if I absolutely have to, but I don't like them. I'm autistic, that's the best way I can explain it. My husband and older children do, just not me. We have a landline.

A pretty basic mobile (provided it has recording) would probably be enough, rather than a smartphone, but if you "don't like them" then... you don't like them.

yksi

I also think you could get into the habit of soaking her parcels in the bathtub and then placing them out near the street when it's dark. Bonus points if you have a dog which will pee on them.

Grumpy_chap

Sadly, the issue of people not redirecting post arises every so often, thought not usually with the level of other contact / behaviour that is described here.

All the OP can do is to write "NOT KNOWN AT THIS ADDRESS" on everything (including junk mail and important-looking mail) and put it in the post box.  Don't write anything more and don't try to contact companies to resolve as companies cannot deal with you over someone else's post.  Eventually this will reduce the volume of post and, even, eventually items such as driving licence or passport.

I am unclear as to how the lady accesses your garden etc given the security you have put in and also why you answer the door to her given the CCTV - can you check before answering and ignore if it is the former resident?

It does seem as though the former resident has some health challenges and appropriate medical support is required.  The OP cannot get involved on that side.  Just one other thought as to why this may be happening like this - is it possible the former resident is now homeless?  Perhaps, even, living in the car that has been seen parked locally?  This would not excuse the behaviour but might bring some understanding.

ampersand

Grumpy chap- 
The answers to your questions are in op's posts, if you start again and read them thoroughly.  Attempting to play psychotherapist on such a thread as this is not helpful.
#
Op - I have seen your post by chance and read all the comments.
First, I am sorry you are going through this as a family.  Particularly, I am sorry you are bearing the brunt of it at what should feel like home.

I am struck that no-one has suggested you involve your MP.  Please do so ASAP.  Your MP can insist that police and Royal Mail not only ACT but also that they investigate corrupt staff behaviour AND report back.  

If your MP has long represented your constituency, he or she could well be aware of your harrasser.  Word of such people gets round and you write of other victims of her instability and aggression. 

Bin all enveloped mail.
Ask your husband to leave the parcels with charities en route to work, or by a FREE roadside notice outside your gate or boundary verge.