A previous owner refuses to stop using our address for EVERYTHING!

arghhhh

I should also add that I do worry about what she's using our address for. This person had to sell this house to clear her debts and the majority of letters for the first couple of years were red letters/final demands... I worry because my credit rating is 999 and hers is not going to be great. I want the option of being able to move and not have the value of my house impacted by this issue or anything she could be using our address for. She has received some of our post and actually returned it with NOT KNOWN AT THIS ADDRESS on it and due to them being financial letters, some of our accounts were closed/suspended because of this. She could have got hold of personal information before doing this and I am constantly checking my credit report to see if she's doing anything on my credit file.

doodling

Hi,

arghhhh said:

Sandtree, I probably wasn't clear. I am contacting the companies (only 4 at present) and also sending mail back. 8 cameras may sound a lot, but it's a detached house with a detached garage, so we still have blind spots. They went up last week. She walks around our garden when she wants. We have spent thousands on fencing and gates and security, but she uses the missing letters and parcels as an excuse to come into our garden and enquire, usually leading to her getting angry. Like I said before, I'm autistic as are two of our children and the papered window in our door is for their peace of mind as she stares through our windows if we ignore her. We have been returning post for years and it's still coming, from the same companies. Either they don't act on it or she starts a new account. She intercepts the postman and is on first name terms with them. She has her mail delivered to her by them, even though it's our address. It's only the postal delivery workers she doesn't know or get to in time that are delivering to us, so the problem is even bigger than what we see. I've spoken to postmen about it, but they say that because it's addressed to her, they'll continue to deliver it all to her. I feel like I'm going mad. 

I don't know where she lives, just that it's not far as her car is parked in a carpark in the local village. The post gets returned when my husband goes past a post box on his way to work. We send it back as soon as possible.

If postmen are giving her the post rather than putting it through your door then that is probably a criminal offence on their part - the Royal Mail should be delivering post to an address not a person, I would complain to the Royal Mail about that as it is only encouraging her.

You are under no obligation to return the post, I would simply stick it through a shredder at this point, you are allowed to open it if you want to be nosey.  If she didn't sound so unstable I would suggest giving it to her after opening it just to make a point

If she keeping coming into your front garden after you have asked her not to then the only legal solution is an injunction, but that is time and effort.

arghhhh

It's hard to explain to people. She lived here over 7 years ago and knows some of the postal people from then. They pass on the mail with her name on, to her, even though it's our address. Sometimes she's managed to get our mail and out of spite, that we return her mail; she's done the same to us. The difference is that it IS our address, but she won't accept it. She told my husband he's an idiot because this is her address and I don't know what to say to that. I've tried to explain it to her, but she screams and will not let you talk. I really hoped it was all over last year because the police said that they had explained it to her and she had told them that she would stop using our address, but that hasn't happened. Amazon have told me that I can keep parcels, but I don't want to. I just want her to use her own address, like people usually do if they live in a house. It makes my mind race, wondering why she is using our address and what possible motive she has for continuing to do so. The injunction will be our next step, but I don't want a war. I just want my garden and address back.

Sandtree

arghhhh said:

Sandtree, I probably wasn't clear. I am contacting the companies (only 4 at present) and also sending mail back. 8 cameras may sound a lot, but it's a detached house with a detached garage, so we still have blind spots. They went up last week. She walks around our garden when she wants. We have spent thousands on fencing and gates and security, but she uses the missing letters and parcels as an excuse to come into our garden and enquire, usually leading to her getting angry. Like I said before, I'm autistic as are two of our children and the papered window in our door is for their peace of mind as she stares through our windows if we ignore her. We have been returning post for years and it's still coming, from the same companies. Either they don't act on it or she starts a new account. She intercepts the postman and is on first name terms with them. She has her mail delivered to her by them, even though it's our address. It's only the postal delivery workers she doesn't know or get to in time that are delivering to us, so the problem is even bigger than what we see. I've spoken to postmen about it, but they say that because it's addressed to her, they'll continue to deliver it all to her. I feel like I'm going mad. 

I don't know where she lives, just that it's not far as her car is parked in a carpark in the local village. The post gets returned when my husband goes past a post box on his way to work. We send it back as soon as possible.

Companies wont speak to you or take notice as you are not their customer... if anyone could just phone up and do a change of address or claim they had the wrong address people would constantly be harassing each other by phoning their ex's bank etc saying they dont live at the address on file any more.

By simply putting it back in the post with either Addressee Gone Away or Addressee Unknown they have physical proof that the address on file isnt where they should be going and they can take action on that.

If the postman is giving items that are addressed to your property to someone else then that is a matter that needs to be raised with Royal Mail. I dont think the postie has the legal discretion to redirect mail based on personal knowledge of the area but RM will confirm. 

arghhhh

Sandtree, I have managed to remove them from Amazon and DBS is ongoing. I have accounts with some of the companies this person is using, so they have that as a record too. I have crime reference numbers relating to police telling this person that they don't live here or have rights to our address.

My husband is going to the local Royal Mail depo tomorrow to see if they can intervene before it gets to us. It is very frustrating. I've spoken to a few postmen and women and they all keep repeating the same thing and I feel like I'm being the unreasonable one - but she's using our address. Surely if they were experiencing the same, they'd want to put a stop to it. 

yksi

I wonder whether it would be an option to get yourself a post office box, and stop using your physical mail slot? I  realise it shouldn't be your problem to solve, but hers. Realistically, she is unhinged and I suspect it would help your peace of mind.

I agree with the others, from now on just bin her letters and keep any packages that arrive for her. Call it payment for the stress she has caused. If she manages to ask you about them say you've not had anything arrive.

GrumpyDil

I would definately follow this up with your local royal mail delivery office. 

The local posties should be delivering the post to the address on the envelope and not handing over mail to this woman. 

HampshireH

yksi said:

I wonder whether it would be an option to get yourself a post office box, and stop using your physical mail slot? I  realise it shouldn't be your problem to solve, but hers. Realistically, she is unhinged and I suspect it would help your peace of mind.

I agree with the others, from now on just bin her letters and keep any packages that arrive for her. Call it payment for the stress she has caused. If she manages to ask you about them say you've not had anything arrive.

It wouldn't stop the perpetrator mail from arriving only the OPs as it would have to be registered in OP name and like any redirection would only apply to them 

Also Royal Mail PO transfer box is £417 a year or £42 a month. That's extortionate but I guess they are providing a service 

I think reporting harassment is the most effective way but I also think you shouldn't be changing your life as a result 

Carry on as normal and report anything which happens

Complain to royal mail in writing that the postie is actively encouraging her visits so that needs to stop explain your have police involvement.

Get an injunction. 

arghhhh

We're not in a position to pay for a po box and we have adult children that spend every penny they earn on the internet, so we have a lot of parcels, so the PO box would need to be huge. 

My husband plans to go to our local Royal Mail sorting building tomorrow after work and see if they can do anything. 

I know I shouldn't be changing my life, but it's easier said than done. I find people hard if they are aggressive and I don't know how to cope in that situation. For the most part, I think I blend in and you wouldn't know I was autistic, but when I'm confronted, even in a non-aggressive way, I can't cope or hide that I can't cope. She has seen me in tears and I do think she enjoys it, so I try and avoid her. She has broke me and I'm quite ashamed that I'm not strong enough to handle her myself. I was very independent when we moved here but now I rely more and more on my husband and I don't like who I have become. 

I think I need another incident to get an injunction which I have removed myself from being in that situation. I don't want to drive her into an argument and seeing me is all it takes, so I don't go out. The last time I went in our garden without my husband was two weeks ago because my husband forgot to put the bin out. My heart was pounding out of my chest and I came back in crying. I was so sure she would be there. I feel so alone. I'm just shocked by the police response. I really thought the DBS thing would be enough to take legal action. It's worrying that they are taking no steps because she works with vulnerable people and could be hiding anything.

HampshireH

arghhhh said:

We're not in a position to pay for a po box and we have adult children that spend every penny they earn on the internet, so we have a lot of parcels, so the PO box would need to be huge. 

My husband plans to go to our local Royal Mail sorting building tomorrow after work and see if they can do anything. 

I know I shouldn't be changing my life, but it's easier said than done. I find people hard if they are aggressive and I don't know how to cope in that situation. For the most part, I think I blend in and you wouldn't know I was autistic, but when I'm confronted, even in a non-aggressive way, I can't cope or hide that I can't cope. She has seen me in tears and I do think she enjoys it, so I try and avoid her. She has broke me and I'm quite ashamed that I'm not strong enough to handle her myself. I was very independent when we moved here but now I rely more and more on my husband and I don't like who I have become. 

I think I need another incident to get an injunction which I have removed myself from being in that situation. I don't want to drive her into an argument and seeing me is all it takes, so I don't go out. The last time I went in our garden without my husband was two weeks ago because my husband forgot to put the bin out. My heart was pounding out of my chest and I came back in crying. I was so sure she would be there. I feel so alone. I'm just shocked by the police response. I really thought the DBS thing would be enough to take legal action. It's worrying that they are taking no steps because she works with vulnerable people and could be hiding anything.

What do your neighbours think? Are they supportive? Does she work in the village too?

I didn't mean to go out of your way to incite her. But by shutting yourself away in this way your mental health will likely decline (panic attacks evididencing the impact)

Don't be ashamed. The only person who should be is this lady who is based on your posts clearly not stable in these circumstances