2022 - Moving forward

ladyholly

I went to several different primary schools (Dad in RAF) and each had their own systems about school meals. The 2 worst ones were the one who insisted we finished everything on the plate. Main courses were ok if not exactly well cooked but I couldnt take the the texture of semolina or sago and on one memorable occasion ended up throwing up all over the dish and the table - I would have been about 6 years old. The other one was one school had the milk for morning break stored next to a radiator. This meant the at best the milk was warm at worst it had gone off and we had to drink it.  To this day I dont like warm milk in any form even when made into hot chocolate etc.

This led to an argument when I was in hospital having my daughter. The ward sister wanted me to have cocoa, hot chocolate or something similar for my supper time drink, I said I would lke cold milk or tea. This wasnt allowed so I said forget it I wont have anything.This, too, was not acceptable so I grudgingly got my cold milk. It always made me laugh that a woman who was expected to fully care for another human being within a day or two of this incident couldnt make a decision about what she wanted to drink.This was in the days when most women stayed in hospital for a week to ten days after the birth of their babies.

another_casualty

Humdinger1 said:

another_casualty said:

Thanks @EssexHebridean😼
we're not too unsimilar regarding milk / cereals / texture etc 
In my most horrendous situation in infants school , " dinner ladies"  forced me to have salads with mash which  was hard and wasn't cooked properly etc 🤮.
The good news is that they are probably dead now . Some of the  salad had  caterpillar type things in them . I can still remember me sitting in the back of the classroom with other pupils in the infant school , and I saw my mum in the distance with her hands around 5he head priests throat. He had a reputation as being too strict . She never knew it was the " dinner ladies " that were causing me to bite my nails and fingers till there was swelling and green puss building up 🤮. Everything stopped after that , and I never had school dinners in that school again . 

I still detest spring onions , salad and most veg to this day .

Enough of that , I'm gonna have some green &blacks 🍫 😼

@another_casualty I love the sound of your mum! Did she, by any chance, go on to shoot the sheriff? I refused milk and was luckily at a pretty advanced school that didn't insist.  Mind you, we did have one insane teacher who berated us for not noticing that the class budgie had vanished and then informed us that the headmaster had 'shot it with his big gun.'  Was there a hidden message in there or perhaps it was Cockney rhyming slang?

The thing I remember my mum telling me that , as she was concerned and telling the priest about what was going on ,,he kept pointing a biro at here in a condescending manner . This is where he panicked and said that she must be having a brainstorm. Amazing really . He was a senior priest . God says come as you are , and he used to snap at children in front of others who never had white socks on . Times were hard etc 
He wouldn’t approve of some of my death metal albums 😼

Humdinger1

I won't leave it there....

jwil

Sunshine_girl2 said:

jwil said:

I've sold something on ebay today so that's a nice surprise.  Something I was contemplating reducing but hadn't got round to so even better.

I was so glad I didn't have to travel with all that rain today, I don't like motorway driving in the rain.

I'm contemplating putting in for compressed hours at work - so do my full time work over 4 days instead of 5.  I'm trying to think through the pros and cons.

Pros -

• a day off in the week - time to myself and also a clear house to be able to do housework/hobbies.
• One day a week guaranteed with the kids when they are on school holidays
• Still getting full pay and pension
• I could probably do 2 days at home and 2 in the office, so no extra childcare needed.
• Better work/home life balance.
• If work agreed and I wanted to change back again if it didn't work out, they'd let me.

Cons - 

• 2 very long days in the office would be needed if I wanted to keep the two days at home from not being too long
• Those 4 days would be tiring and busy, but I would have 4 days of busyness rather than 5.
• I wouldn't build up as much flexi as it wouldn't be easy to do additional hours, but I'd have the extra day each week anyway.
• Hassle if the kids were ill or I needed to collect them from school - though I could work from home and now have childcare help as well.

Am I missing anything else?  I've spoken to DH and as usual he's just told me to do what I think is best 🙄.  There's no guarantee that work would agree, but I don't see any reason why not.  I worked compressed hours before, but it was just 4.5 days rather than 4.  I stopped as I didn't really gain from the half day. I prefer longer days rather than shorter days as I can get stuck into things.  It would be 2 days in the office rather than 1, but I think I'd need to do that to get the hours in and avoid getting distracted when the kids come home.

I probably won't do anything for a while, I want to mull it over a bit.

Ho Jwil , always a lurker on your diary but I do compressed hours so thought I would give you my perspective . I started off originally on 10 days in 9 , then 5 days in 4 . I work 7.30 until 5 with 30 min lunch. I found it hard at first , but now would never go back to 5 days a week. I don't have children though so can do the early start. The thought of only doing 4 days spurs me on every Monday morning. What day would you like to take off ? 

I am going part time in June but still doing 2 9 hour days . Your pros and cons list is very good . 

Thank you, that's really useful.  I can do the early starts as I always do an hour or so before school.  One benefit of working from home!  My day off will probably have to be Monday, Thursday or Friday, so probably Friday I think.  Part time is my dream, but not yet.

savingholmes said:

If you are considering compressed hours - while it is tempting to pick a Monday or Friday as a day off - you may benefit more from a mid week day off. 

I've sent you a PM Jwil about autistic traits in girls - which are different to those of boys. I found it really helpful.

Ideally I'd like a Wednesday but can't do Tues or Wed for work reasons so it would have to be one of the others.  I'm happy to be led by work, but am leaning towards Friday.  I think it would annoy me having Thursday and then having to go back for one day.

peb said:

Joining in on the compressed hours, I did 7.15 to 5, I'm an early riser so it worked.  However I really was shattered by Friday and it meant Friday night was a right off.  I had a relatively easy drive in but using the park and ride meant less buses so traffic was bad it was easy to be late.  I went home in rush hour traffic.  I preferred this so I could swim on the way home which I'd have struggled with if I finished later.  I did it so as to look after my mum one day a week and give my dad a day off so my none working day was tiring which didn't help.  

Thank you.  I'm an early bird too, so would lean towards an earlier start.  I worry about being tired so it being a write off, but really, I don't think the hours would be an awful lot different to what I'm doing now, I'd just have the benefit of a day off to recover.  Of course if you were providing care, you weren't getting any time off, as it's definitely hard work.

savingholmes

Good luck whatever you decided. Nice to have the option. 

jwil

Thank you everyone, it's so nice hearing all your thoughts and experiences.  It helps having people to bounce ideas off!

I will probably have a chat with my line manager on Monday and test the water.  I did think that now is a good time to go for it as well, as my current managers are really good and flexible.  However, there's massive organisational change going on so I have no idea where I might wind up.  It would be good to get this in place before any big changes happen.

I've had a quieter day today with no meetings which has been lovely.  I've been able to catch up with a few things, and just sit in silence with no chatter or background noise.  It's been a beautiful day too which is always good for the soul.

School had a 2nd hand uniform sale today, so I got a nice bundle.
4 summer dresses
1 cardigan
2 pairs tailored shorts
2 ties
1 pair daps

I donated £20 which will save me a fortune!

I have told everyone that I am going nowhere this weekend, and seeing no one.  I just want a weekend at home pottering and chilling out.  DH is on swimming duty so I've nowhere to be.  I'm tempted to splash out on a takeaway tomorrow too so I don't have to cook for a change.  The weather is meant to be good, so I shall enjoy it   I'm also going to try and limit my time online as well.  Have a good weekend everyone

jwil

savingholmes said:

Good luck whatever you decided. Nice to have the option. 

Thank you, yes it is good to have the option.  Not that I know whether they will agree yet!

CRANKY40

Don't pick Monday as your day off....bank holidays just aren't the same when you still have to do a full weeks hours over the remaining four days. 

jwil

CRANKY40 said:

Don't pick Monday as your day off....bank holidays just aren't the same when you still have to do a full weeks hours over the remaining four days. 

Good thinking, I would hate to lose that!

savingholmes

Although you will get given the equivalent of your bank holidays in your holiday allowance to make up for it if you do compressed hours... You will probably end up booking all your holidays in hours... depending on your organisation.