The Best View Comes After the Hardest Climb.

Buffythedebtslayer

Willowtree222 said:

Hope you’re both ok. Anyone could have brought it in so please don’t just put all the pressure on yourself. 

Take care Buffy x

No one else comes to the house. Definitely me. 

Buffythedebtslayer

Grumpelstiltskin said:

Buffy don't beat your self up.

You are  not and cannot be a hermit, you had to go out into the big wide world and unfortunately that always meant there was a risk you would bring the infection home.

If you concerned about your mother get on the phone to 111.

Yeah I know rationally it sort of had to happen. But Mum never got her booster jab cos of me. Well because she didn't want me to take time of work and so didn't tell me till about a week later and then the nurse was meant to do it and it just never happened cos her doctor is !!!!!!. 

At least the house work is done. Kitchen looks a lot better. Need some breakfast but had better wait for mum. 

Willowtree222

Her not getting her booster jab is not because of you. It's because she didn't tell you, the nurse didn't do it and the Dr didn't follow it up. None of those were within your control. 

Someone gave it you Buffy, It's not like you invented a virus that you then decided to pass on to your mum. You stayed in your room despite the fact it was freezing and did as much as you could to keep it away. The fact you work in a school and likely have been working since the day it came out and the fact you have only just got it is brilliant going. It shows that you have been taking all the necessary precautions. I think, unless we live in a complete bubble, it is likely that we will come into contact with it. We can do as much as we can to help prevent that but it is an airborne virus. 

Feeling guilty is going to help you get better. 

Big hugs Buffy. x

Buffythedebtslayer

Willowtree222 said:

Her not getting her booster jab is not because of you. It's because she didn't tell you, the nurse didn't do it and the Dr didn't follow it up. None of those were within your control. 

Someone gave it you Buffy, It's not like you invented a virus that you then decided to pass on to your mum. You stayed in your room despite the fact it was freezing and did as much as you could to keep it away. The fact you work in a school and likely have been working since the day it came out and the fact you have only just got it is brilliant going. It shows that you have been taking all the necessary precautions. I think, unless we live in a complete bubble, it is likely that we will come into contact with it. We can do as much as we can to help prevent that but it is an airborne virus. 

Feeling guilty is going to help you get better. 

Big hugs Buffy. x

That is true, I mean she is double vaccinated and I mean she never stays in bed so that isn't much of a gauge but whilst she has been ill its not like the house is disgusting or anything, she has kept up with the dishwasher and the washing. She has been ill since Tuesday. I will just have to see how it goes. 

Willowtree222

That is all you can do. She is keeping on top of things so she is doing okay. 
I did mean to write 'it isn't going to help you get better!'

Now please can you stop beating yourself with that stick? 

You have a very clear and defined plan. You have a good amount in savings and know what you need to do. Time will get you there. It's not easy when you are stuck in the situation you are and the feeling of being trapped. 
x

milann

I’m not convinced you should go to work. Have to you tested how you are once you are out in the real world. You need to do this first.  I suspect all you will do is worry how your mum is - which won’t help your recovery. You wouldn’t be expected to prepare work if you were ill in hospital so shouldn’t if you are ill at home. Expectations on teachers really makes me mad.

greenbee

milann said:

I’m not convinced you should go to work. Have to you tested how you are once you are out in the real world. You need to do this first.  I suspect all you will do is worry how your mum is - which won’t help your recovery. You wouldn’t be expected to prepare work if you were ill in hospital so shouldn’t if you are ill at home. Expectations on teachers really makes me mad.

To be fair, it's not just teachers - but as a nation (probably more than just the UK though) we have a culture where it has become unacceptable to take time off when sick (which is how flu and colds have always done so well in previous winters, as people bring them to work rather than keeping them to themselves) and the concept of convalescence and taking time out to recover properly is now completely alien. Once you have no symptoms of the original illness, you're considered to be 'better' and well enough to be back at work. 

I've worked from a hospital bed more than once, and while on bed rest following surgery. So many companies have no paid sick leave that it has become the norm. It isn't going to be easy to change it. 

@Buffythedebtslayer - I don't think you should be going back until a. you are sure you can manage without keeling over and making yourself worse and b. your mum is symptom-free. 

RosaBernicia

Please don't be hard on yourself Buffy.  You've worked so hard in such difficult circumstances and your mum's own decisions made it difficult for either of you to find other options.

And I second/ umpteenth not going back til you're fully well. 

[Deleted User]

Oh Buffy.  I know it's hard but please try not to feel guilty - I think it's inevitable we are all going to catch it at some point, it's just a matter of when.  Also, I know your mum is ill but she is also an adult and does need to tell you these things - if she doesn't tell you then you can't help.  And also we all know you already do too much.  Can you lighten any of the mental load by asking your siblings to take over certain things?

And don't go back to work too early.  Someone in my office had covid, is now allowed out and is straight back to work - and she is just exhausted.  This thing can take quite a long time to recover from I'm led to believe.  What you need is a good break so you can be fighting fit for 2022.

Also, great work on the house savings, keep going!

Sun_Addict

Sorry to hear your mum’s got Covid. Don’t blame yourself it couldn’t be helped. Hoping she doesn’t get too poorly with it and recovers quickly 🙏 This blooming Covid is the gift that keeps on giving 😡