Frosted film on neighbour's window

Jeepers_Creepers

Rosa_Damascena said:

It's always been a one-way conversation. Every time we tried to (politely) ask her to stop screaming (like she was in pain and about to die) at 2am in the morning, we got told that they have the right to argue and we can't tell them what they can and cannot do in their home.

When she started to accuse us of being racist out of nowhere, I just left the conversation, nothing more (rational) I could have said.

I think this could come back to bite if you make a complaint.

I doubt that very much. The world is a bit crazy, but common sense still largely prevails.

Someone shouting 'Racist!' had better have some evidence to back it up. It wouldn't take long for this woman's sense of reality to be questioned, based on her previous behaviour.

Anyhoo, arciere can claim the same :-)

unforeseen

Someone shouting 'Racist!' had better have some evidence to back it up.

You only have to see various news reports, media output to know that that is not the case. The term gets uttered a lot with no evidence, to the point that it has become meaningless.

Disagree with someone? They must be racist to have a different view.
Somebody of a different colour upset you? They must be racist. 
A decision not going the way you want? It must have been based on racism. 

[Deleted User]

unforeseen said:

Someone shouting 'Racist!' had better have some evidence to back it up.

You only have to see various news reports, media output to know that that is not the case. The term gets uttered a lot with no evidence, to the point that it has become meaningless.

Disagree with someone? They must be racist to have a different view.
Somebody of a different colour upset you? They must be racist. 
A decision not going the way you want? It must have been based on racism. 

 Exactly what evidence would be appropriate? 

 Not saying the OP is racist in any way but do YOU realise racism isn't only saying certain vile words directed at people of colour? Then we have those who claim they can use and direct those words because young black men say them too. 

arciere

In regards to the being-racist thing, since it hit my nerve (I worked for almost 10 years in an Indian company where 90% of my colleagues were all from different countries, so it really was impossible not to react to that accusation), I told her that in all the interactions we have ever had, she's been the only one ever mentioning nationality (saying that we, as Europeans in the UK, have some sort of 'privilege'), religion and race.
Her response was that, since we asked them if they could kindly open a window when they cook as our flat absorbs all the smell, being upstairs, that implied that we labelled their food as 'smelly', which means that we are racists because of their Asian background. Also, according to her, I "think that, since they're Asians, they must keep quiet anything I do".
I mean, seriously? I think everyone reaches a point where ignoring somebody is no longer an option.
EDIT: By the way, depending on the issue of the day, her argument changes from 'we have Asian background to 'but we are British because we were born here'. So it doesn't matter which side you're on, if any, it will always be the wrong one.

Jeepers_Creepers

unforeseen said:

Someone shouting 'Racist!' had better have some evidence to back it up.

You only have to see various news reports, media output to know that that is not the case. The term gets uttered a lot with no evidence, to the point that it has become meaningless.

Disagree with someone? They must be racist to have a different view.
Somebody of a different colour upset you? They must be racist. 
A decision not going the way you want? It must have been based on racism. 

I wonder where you find these news & media reports?

Jeepers_Creepers

arciere said:

In regards to the being-racist thing, since it hit my nerve (I worked for almost 10 years in an Indian company where 90% of my colleagues were all from different countries, so it really was impossible not to react to that accusation), I told her that in all the interactions we have ever had, she's been the only one ever mentioning nationality (saying that we, as Europeans in the UK, have some sort of 'privilege'), religion and race.
Her response was that, since we asked them if they could kindly open a window when they cook as our flat absorbs all the smell, being upstairs, that implied that we labelled their food as 'smelly', which means that we are racists because of their Asian background. Also, according to her, I "think that, since they're Asians, they must keep quiet anything I do".
I mean, seriously? I think everyone reaches a point where ignoring somebody is no longer an option.
EDIT: By the way, depending on the issue of the day, her argument changes from 'we have Asian background to 'but we are British because we were born here'. So it doesn't matter which side you're on, if any, it will always be the wrong one.

If someone cooks strong-smelling food that permeates someone else's flat, then the reason is because they cook strong-smelling food that is presumably not being extracted away as it ideally should, or the building has a design flaw.

Race and racism has now't to do with it. Unhelpful behaviour may well have.

Sadly, the Italian culinary range is not as well-equipped to retaliate in kind :-)

arciere

Jeepers_Creepers said:

Sadly, the Italian culinary range is not as well-equipped to retaliate in kind :-)

That's a good one 
Although, my 10-year experience in an Indian restaurant company might well be my ace in the hole 

Rosa_Damascena

arciere said:

Her response was that, since we asked them if they could kindly open a window when they cook as our flat absorbs all the smell, being upstairs, that implied that we labelled their food as 'smelly', which means that we are racists because of their Asian background. Also, according to her, I "think that, since they're Asians, they must keep quiet anything I do".

The fact is that fried spices, onions, garlic and ginger used in any cuisine honks. It would be considerate not to let the smell permeate a neighbour's space. Having to live with it daily would be a tipping point for me, I'd want to get the hell out.

Having said that I like eating Indian food, but the smell is enough to stop me cooking it. Which is why my new kitchen is being set well apart from the main house (big luxury, I know).

arciere

I love Indian food and occasionally I like to cook something that vaguely resembles Indian cuisine as well.
I never asked them not too cook, but to at least try and mitigate the smell issues by opening their kitchen window, which is always sealed tight. Her response was "we set the heating to 23 degrees and if we open the window it will get cold" and "can't you just move to another room while we cook?"

Rosa_Damascena

arciere said:

I love Indian food and occasionally I like to cook something that vaguely resembles Indian cuisine as well.
I never asked them not too cook, but to at least try and mitigate the smell issues by opening their kitchen window, which is always sealed tight. Her response was "we set the heating to 23 degrees and if we open the window it will get cold" and "can't you just move to another room while we cook?"

They must be so used to the smell they are nose blind. If the answer was as simple as moving to another room you'd do it.