Sh*t creek - is now in my rear view mirror...!

MovingForwards

We are never free of these things, it feels like they hibernate and awaken at the wrong time.

You could always start a turnip farm 🤗 that way you could have turnip pie, fried turnip, curried turnip, turnip soup, turnip mash......

Irenadler

Onebrokelady said:

I think you managed very well your buying wasn't a complete disaster, you've ended up with a clean house and some hearty food to eat so could have been worse 😊 I have depression which is treated with medication however I sometimes go off the rails and it causes me to spend, years ago I would buy ridiculous things ( one example is this house I'm living in)in the past  I've gone out and bought wood flooring for my house despite having no way of getting it home or getting it laid and the list goes on. I'm better at controlling myself now and am usually happy with a small purchase such as a 99p book for my Kindle but I know I have to be vigilant because it's so easy to go off on a mad shopping spree
I have my EF in a separate account but in the same place as my current account so that I can easily shuffle things around if I need to, however my EF is very strictly kept for emergencies and in only use it as a last resort, I've just had a fairly big vet bill which wasn't budgeted for and I used money I'm saving for flooring rather than use my EF  as I don't want to use it for something that could be budgeted for, hopefully I will get at least half of it back via insurance if they agree to pay up x

Hey Onebrokelady
Thank you, I needed a reality check, I know it is not a huge disaster.... It's the going off on one that worries me, this was only a 'phase one shtf moment'.... I have been in 'phase two = more spending = spiralling into depression/debt'... and that was freaking me out because I thought I was over all that. Yeah, I hear you, one day I ordered a multi-fuel stove, and I live in a smokeless zone area! Mad impulse....

I guess I stopped being on guard because I had managed to shrink the outgoings so much, thanks to folk on here and the 'benefit' thread, and I made the mistake of thinking everything was ok, and actually relaxed, only for the PTSD demon to creep up on me and bite me on the behind

Thank goodness you had a budget pot or three for the vet, I have to get my EF up and running asap before my inner money demon goes beserkers on me.... As I say, I have deliberately put the 'brakes' on in several ways, including shopping at one of the budget shops. If I had been in a 'normal' supermarket there might only be fluff left in my pockets now....

Irenadler

MovingForwards said:

We are never free of these things, it feels like they hibernate and awaken at the wrong time.

You could always start a turnip farm 🤗 that way you could have turnip pie, fried turnip, curried turnip, turnip soup, turnip mash......

Ha! That would be a real 'turn-up' (groan)...

Yeah, I guess I can't take it for granted and pretend everything is fine... Just wishful thinking.... I suppose I should think of it as my 'new normal', like everyone else is also now having to adapt to theirs....

Skint_yet_Again

At least you can recognise the signs and see it for what it is. Some things we are never free of but we learn to cope & manage our daily lives. You wouldn’t beat yourself up if you got a cold so why do it for any other illness. 

Irenadler

Thank you Skinty...

It took me days to recognise unfortunately..., kept being in denial of what was happening to me, like having a weird kind of tunnel vision in my head whilst my body was off and running amok among the cleaning products and tills... 

I mean, I am supposed to be a responsible adult and all that, having a cold would have slowed me down!
  
I understand what you are saying though, that illness or injury don't mean I should then have a go at myself mentally, for something that just happened.... It's like having an invisible handicap, where I look 'normal', put on a front, and tell everyone I am fine because saying otherwise has resulted in family going into frenzied anxiety mode.

And that just adds to me feeling cr*p about myself, feeling a failure/loser, etc and feels like I am carrying the burden of their worries too, when I can barely cope with functioning myself. Cannot cope with them worrying about me, too many phone call check-ups, just 'popping in' if I don't answer, or close relatives convincing themselves I am lying dead somewhere if I don't pick up the phone instantly... Sorry, TMI and too graphic there....

I am going to contact the bank and tell them there is no sign of any paperwork for the account, perhaps they are still struggling on furloughed staff or whatnot, and see what's happening there. On the plus side I have added coinage to my stash pot. I now have £8.45, go me! Off to update the signature now I have my head around it....

Irenadler

Hey all
Hope I have not terrified you with too much information....

Going to stick more on topic with money saving, and positive thinking, because that was my original goal!

So, cooking MSE:

Made fruit crumble using up cheap plums, and two apples that were badly bruised but I didn't notice when I bought them, so saved them going in the compost. Cost estimate £1.20 which fed me and two relatives generously, they even kindly went and brought vegan ice cream (Swedish Glace - best value and taste I think), so, cheap and tasty, and lots of the ice cream left over which they will keep for any future visits - they are lovely.

Not started on the 'building block' veggie meals yet, using up salad and falafels/wraps as its going to be hot for the next couple of days. After watching the 'Extinction' show last night from Sir Dave, I am so glad that I am vegan, and not going to waste anything I have in the fridge. The only slight hesitation I have about the show was that solutions were gently implied and pointed out instead of someone screaming them out...  

To me the solutions were obvious - go vegan. IF anyone actually researches into it, exploitation of animals for food, destruction of wildlife habitat to fuel that, etc is a big part of why we are in a mess, not to mention how animals suffer for it. Going ethical vegan would resolve so many issues mentioned... Getting off soapbox now!

Actual money saving: a bit thin on the ground, apart from not spending anything and not entering any shops to spend anything, and not shopping on-line for days because of my 'episode' of spending.... I am ringing the bank to see what's happening on the saving account. Once that's done, I am actually starting the serious saving via direct debit, and I will class that as money 'spent' when it's really set aside emergency funds, and money for annual one-off's like house and contents insurance, dog vaccination, green waste subscription. That way, I will force myself to forget about it, unless it is really, really needed, and I will finally have a financial cushion and not a melt-down if an emergency hits.

Note that the 'green waste' is for stuff I can't compost like twigs and branches from pruning, perennial weeds/seed heads. I saw up larger logs for my wildlife log pile at the bottom of the garden, but this is only 4-5 times a year. I save the leaves for natural leaf litter by raking it to the bottom of the garden and under the hedges for a mulch. 

What can be composted, is, and split between a compost bin and wormery. The worms generously 'give' a liquid feed too, which is diluted with water to feed fruit bushes/veggies. Slight disaster in that the chilli peppers I was nurturing weren't chilli peppers, but, some sort of wild flowers... Doh! Added to the compost bin though. I had tried organic compost this year, and they appeared in the pots which were supposed to be chilli seeds. Ah well, live and learn! I wouldn't mind, but, a relative hopefully asked for any surplus, so they are going to be disappointed. Maybe I should buy chilli's on offer and pass them off as my own? 

Anyway, I have tackled the book/CD/DVD mountain by dragging it to the local charity shop as I couldn't get my head around selling or listing at all. And fed up of looking at it. I have an old china cabinet and old office chair which I am going to try and donate to charity too, if they will accept. A phone call to check. I can't guarantee whether the office chair (well padded and high backed proper swivel chair) is fire proof as I got it second hand with no labels, so may have to end up binning it which is a shame. It's too big for the room it was in, although comfy, and has adjustable back and seat height on it.... 

Don't know if anyone will want a cabinet, as, its an older one with curled legs, like tiny hooves on it, with glass shelves, as I don't think it's the in thing anymore. Yes, I have been spending too much time on the 'Swedish death cleaning' & minimalist web-sites!

Getting rid of stuff is a relief and so much easier to clean....

MovingForwards

This is your diary Ren, you post whatever you want!

The crumble sounds great, not sure I could resist eating the last of the ice cream. 

Saving is a bill to be paid each month, once that is settled in your mind, it no longer becomes spending money. Hopefully the bank will get that sorted out for you soon so you can set up your standing order and relax a bit knowing next year's annual bills are covered.

Your 'green waste' can be composted, it just takes a few years. I've a builders sack full of branches, chopped up dead weeds, twigs and other things. Depends if you have the space to leave it for ages. 
The rushed to make compost from the shops hasn't been too good, it's been badly processed quickly due to demand. A lot of people on my gardening group are complaining about stones, rocks, weeds etc in the bag. I've ruled out ever buying one brand because of how it was.

Ask a friend if they want to list the chair on FB or gumtree for you, they could do it as a freebie or under £20 as they sell quickly!
The cabinet sounds lovely and I'm sure the charity shop will have it.
I live by the one in, one out rule. If I buy a book, one gets donated, clothes I'm only buying when there's no life in what I'm replacing. It goes from daily use, to gardening to scrap. Helps keep the possessions to space ratio favourable 🤗

Irenadler

MovingForwards said:

This is your diary Ren, you post whatever you want!
I know Babs, but, I think I have terrified everyone with the mental health issues.  I think they have run away screaming...
The crumble sounds great, not sure I could resist eating the last of the ice cream. 
Well, the relatives had 'normal' stuff, so I felt I couldn't pig out on the entire tub! Not in public anyways.... he he
Saving is a bill to be paid each month, once that is settled in your mind, it no longer becomes spending money. Hopefully the bank will get that sorted out for you soon so you can set up your standing order and relax a bit knowing next year's annual bills are covered.
That is a better way of thinking of it, thank you, rather than 'set asides'...
Your 'green waste' can be composted, it just takes a few years. I've a builders sack full of branches, chopped up dead weeds, twigs and other things. Depends if you have the space to leave it for ages.
I was wondering about 'hugelkultur' - where you pile it up and cover it in soil to make raised beds, good way of utilising it. But I do want to encourage wildlife, even if I have to chase the dog around the garden if she captures any of it....  
 
The rushed to make compost from the shops hasn't been too good, it's been badly processed quickly due to demand. A lot of people on my gardening group are complaining about stones, rocks, weeds etc in the bag. I've ruled out ever buying one brand because of how it was.
Yes, I have been surprised at what I have found in bags of compost recently, like bits of plastic, what looks like pieces of roots, etc. Not exactly 'finely tilled' and not brilliant for seedlings. God knows what I was carefully nurturing....!
Ask a friend if they want to list the chair on FB or gumtree for you, they could do it as a freebie or under £20 as they sell quickly!
Ah yes, phone a friend! I should really ask the family/friends because they might want one, especially with  a lot more people working from home, why didn't I think of this?
The cabinet sounds lovely and I'm sure the charity shop will have it.
I live by the one in, one out rule. If I buy a book, one gets donated, clothes I'm only buying when there's no life in what I'm replacing. It goes from daily use, to gardening to scrap. Helps keep the possessions to space ratio favourable 🤗

I like that idea - I am going to try using the charity shops/library only for 'entertainment' like books, dvd's, etc, and re-donate to charity shops (like my own mini circulating library!) since they shut the local library down, and have to travel x number of miles to get to the nearest one now. Better to spend pennies than pounds, or nothing, if I can get to the library at times it is actually open...

Onebrokelady

Was just going to say the same as Movingforwards,it's your diary and it's up to you what you feel like you want to write or share . I would think the charity shop would take the cabinet for sure,people are still into renovating old furniture so someone would snap it up, I would put the chair on freecycle as free to collect and I bet it will be gone in a jiffy, we have a local community group for the area I live in and people are always putting stuff on there that they want to get rid of,it normally goes by the end of the day 😊

Irenadler

Thanks OBL
For some reason, typing your initials makes me want to say 'Obi Wan...'? But then maybe that's just me....
I keep thinking that I am going wildly off topic, as this diary is really to help me focus on my financial health, which I have seriously neglected. I will attempt to freecycle it if family don't want it. Ta!