Missy’s family of 4, paying off debts, saving for a house and just trying to survive!

Skint_yet_Again

Just delurking (is that a word 😆) to say I am so sorry to hear you are having such a difficult stressful time at the moment missy.  Have you thought about asking HMRC for a time to pay arrangement? Might take a bit of the pressure off. Hope things settle down and get better for you 

https://www.gov.uk/difficulties-paying-hmrc

WinterWarrior

What horrible luck Missy 😖
I have no advice, but hope things improve real soon! 

missymoo81

Hey @Skint_yet_Again thank you so much for delurking. I’ll have a look thank you for the link, so kind. Unfortunately I also have another £5k to find by January, so it would be more like robbing Peter to pay Paul. I have money there which I can use to pay my tax, but it’s meant for OH’s courses.

So, I haven’t spent any money so far today, OH made himself a coffee from home before he went out, so that’s something, as he has been buying one. I’ve been going to the coop pretty much daily and not doing a big shop, so that’s been costing the earth. I need to go to Lidl after work later. 

So cross with myself but need to draw a line under it. 

OH is still really angry and unhappy today, which means his course prob won’t have gone well. Hate being in this unhappy, walking on egg shell situation!

Going to try and reset here, do a bit of Dave Ramsey’s bare bones. And just buy the essentials.

CRANKY40

When my head feels muddled like this I make lists. Get a notebook, give each page the heading of a different problem, write the problem and possible solutions. Anything else you remember can be jotted down later. It gets rid of that "juggling" feeling in your head where you keep trying going over and over things in case you forget something. 

MsPennyMinder

Hi Missy.

I'm really sorry to hear that you've been having a hard time lately. Maybe you could take 10mins and read over some of your diary because you have been working so hard and make some real achievements here. Remind yourself of how strong you are. It really sucks when life goes and drops more issues on you when you had been coping well. I second writing down your thoughts and feelings, especially things you are worried about. Try and set a dedicated restricted time to think/worry ( though I know you are super busy!), so you can push the negative thoughts away the rest of the time. Give yourself some breathing room mentally. It might help things feel less overwhelming.

Best wishes for you all

missymoo81

Thank you @WinterWarrior so sorry I missed your post above.

@CRANKY40 @pennyminder thank you so much for the suggestions. I love a list and will try and do some things to ease the tension. And I really have come a long way, it’s just easy to forget!

We’ve had more grumpy uncalled for messages, almost like trolling in a private group. And give OH his dues, he’s been so good about it and didn’t lose it. So I’m hoping we’re over the worst of things.

I went to work, and went to lidl. We had jackets and tuna as a cheap dinner, using up left over salad that was slowly wilting in the fridge. I was going to get meal deals for tomorrow but have got bread and crisps and chocolate bars for around £1.70 and I have cheese and cucumber so that will be the filling.  That’s a saving of over £5.

I need to ebay I keep saying it I just need to pull my finger out and do it as I’d really like to treat the children to some days out this summer and they won’t be cheap! 

I did a couple of surveys today which I think may have made me £1.

So I think that’s everything. I haven’t lost it or cried today so I’m going to take that as a win. 

WelshKitty85

Hi Missy. Sorry you're having a tough time. Please don't feel angry with yourself. You can't change what's been done, but you can try to make tomorrow a better day. Like others have said, look how much progress you've made over the course of your diary! And don't apologise for being negative. This is your space to use in whatever way helps you, so get it all out! X

Queen_of_the_Hive

@missymoo81 Shame on your customers - its easy for me to say but honestly your trying your best to work within the confines of this crappy situation. Actually don't blame you for taking your foot off the pedal - in a away you may have needed to do so to loosen the pressure. We are now in summer holiday territory which can be expensive so don't be too hard on yourself if your spends go a bit AWOL. Just keep working at it and you'll get there. 

missymoo81

@WelshKitty85 @Queen_of_the_Hive

i really appreciate your kind words. I’m trying not to take it as a huge failure just more of a set back. First steps were taken today, so things can only go up from here 

dawnybabes

Baby steps going in the right direction.  Can you do some surveys on prolific to fund the summer spends ? I got a £7 one yesterday