It's time to begin.....

greensalad

You'll get there soon! It'll come quicker than you expect. I can't believe how weird it felt when I paid off that last bit of debt.

Since then, the highest my debt has gone is £100! I cycle a few purchases a month through PayPal Credit just to show I've got some utilisation going on. It feels very weird!

Kakiste

Thanks @greensalad my favourite part of the MSE forum is the debt free roll of honour, absolutely love reading the posts from people who have reached the debt free stage. 

Kakiste

Daughter's 7th birthday is in a fortnight; she asked for a "massive barbie dollshouse" about a month ago and has been consistent in wanting that since. I got her to look on amazon with me and she was pointing out ones that cost £200+ but I found one on Fb marketplace about a week ago with an RRP of £199 but the person selling it had listed for £25! So on Wednesday evening I trundled off on an hours drive on my own, picked up the dollshouse (which is so big it wouldn't fit in the car!) Wrapped it in a tarp and used ratchet straps to tie it to the roofbars and drove (very slowly) back home. Feeling very money savings and accomplished - also the dollshouse has a working electric lift and lights! She is going to love it.

We cleared out her room last weekend and I fb listed a bunch of her toys and took 2 others bags full to the charity shop so she's made £16 from sales and now has enough space in her room for the barbie house she is unaware ofm (I take the view that as I buy her clothes/shoes when I sell those I keep the money and it goes towards the next sets of clothes/shoes, but as her toys were either presents or bought with her own pocket money that all the money from selling those goes back into her pocket money- I think that's fair)

Daughter has also decided (after discussion with her two BFFs) that she wants a birthday party on the beach..... Which is brilliant and money savings ( ) but I have explained that there is a chance it may rain/be cooler than now. Have yet to discuss it withhusband but I think inviting 6 or so close child friends (all of whom we know the parents so there's not as much faffing strangers around) and have Plan A be a party at the beach and plan b be a rained off beach themed party at our house may work well. 

CRANKY40

Wow, what a bargain that house was. I'd love to see your daughter's face when she sees it 😊

WinterWarrior

That’s brilliant, she’ll love that house. Such a bargain and well done you on the complicated collection. 

I love the Victorian ones, more like works of art than toys! 

Kakiste

So husband is doubly stressed; the imaginary doom that comes up roughly every 3 months is back (he always reckons on it landing early/mid September-) This is the 3rd year we've had the doom laden predictions but as always me pointing out that this is the 8th times he's been absolutely convinced that the bad thing is going to happen means nothing and "just shows how shortsighted I am" I'm going to let it ride out. 

In more actually and real based stress a kid at the horrible school I used to work at has been shotgunning allegations left right and centre, lots of ex-staff already been accused and interviewed. Husband got a call fron police on Friday evening and is having an interview under caution this afternoon. He's incredibly stressed out about the whole thing (and this time I empathise that its all very horrible) 

The details of it are vague (though he'll know more once he goes in today) but from the brief overview of what the police have told him, it's obvious that it can be put in the "absolutely never happened" box. But obviously that doesn't help calm you down when its potentially your career on the line. 

Kakiste

Husband's interview went as well as can be expected. The allegation is absolutely ridiculous, can be proved through records that never happened and involves another 9 members of ex-staff who also categorically never worked there together at the same point. 

So that's good. 

First day back with the kids in school tomorrow, I'm looking forward to it.

enthusiasticsaver

Good that nothing came of the interview with your husband.  Enjoy your first day back tomorrow.  My DD is looking forward to her children going back to school too.  

Kakiste

So stressful news; yesterday my husband came home to find an inspector from our lettings agency exiting the house- he's 3rd party and takes pictures for the lettings agency and the landlord. Usually when we have an interim inspection I put the cats and cat stuff in the massive (16 ft) shed in the front garden for the day- but the email informing me of the inspection had randomly gone into my junk mail (never happened before) and I hadn't seen it. So at some point today the lettings agency will be receiving pictures of my house with cat stuff and most likely cats in the pictures. 

*stressed eye twitching* Husband has taken this with his usual calm demeanour and has been yelling at me down the phone yesterday afternoon and when I got home he was crying about how stressful it all is and now refusing to speak to me. (he doesn't even know that it was me that missed the email, as when I initially checked there was nothing in my inbox/phone log so this is his reaction when he doesn't think it's my direct fault. (Just my fault for not asking about the cats when we moved in) 

Anyhow- I'm now anxiously checking my email every 15 minutes to see if we get anything from the letting agent. My current plan of action will be to say that my grandma is in hospital (which is true) and the cats are hers which we are looking after on an emergency short term basis and that I've informed the landlord. (If we do get anything from the lettings agency I will ring the landlord straight away as I'm mostly sure he would be OK with the above circumstances; I will definitely be able to get in contact with the landlord first as the agency don't have his current number and he has told me he doesn't really bother with them much- he's a traveller who tends to play by his own rules.) If this story is accepted my follow up plan will be to say to the landlord in about 5 weeks that my grandma is having to go into a home as she is too unsteady to be on her own anymore (also true) and would I be able to keep the cats permanently? Then go back to the agency and say that the landlord has agreed keeping the cats. I am hopeful that this plan stands a decent chance of working. If they said no then I would say that I would vaguely say that I would look to rehome the cats- then just continue to tidy them away on inspection days and just not mention them again. Tbf if they say we can keep them this would stop me from having to clear everything into the shed 4/6 times a year.

It may be that they don't notice the pictures at all- cats may not feature if they're hiding/sleeping somewhere and they may not pick up on the scratching posts etc- which would be great. 

However the worst case is that they tell us to get rid of them; I've got everything crossed that this is not the case as I love the little beasts deeply and my daughter would be devastated. 

So far the agency has been open for 3 hours and there's been nothing. So far so good. 

Husband is of course resolute that we'll certainly be getting evicted. I've explained that they won't want to get rid of tenants of 6 years with a long lease who have always paid on time and in full and who keep the house nicely. I've explained that the very worst case will be a crappy email with instructions to get rid of the cats. He doesn't believe me and is behaving horribly. It's all my fault for getting the cats in the first place apparently (despite it being his suggestion that I get the older one back in 2011 and it was only at his nagging that we got the kitten for my daughter last year) 

He's just..... horrible. Not helped at all by the police interview he had at the weekend and also the big horrible thing that he reckons will surely happen between Thursday and Sunday. 

He decided to tell me that even if the cats situation works out well one way or the other 'we're done anyway' as he can't cope with 'everything I touch turning to !!!!!!' He's currently back to threatening to leave multiple times a month and then 180s the second he calms down. I said yesterday "well this is the very best I can do, with our marriage, the housework, life etc, this is my best. If you don't like that then maybe you're right" I then went and slept in the spare room. (didn't sleep much because the bed is horrible) 

I imagine he'll have calmed down and sorted himself out by the weekend but I've pre-emptively found two rentals I like the look of and have contacted the (different to ours) letting agencies saying I'm interested in renting but only if they accept me having two cats. I just figure even if I don't go through with it yet- it's good to have a backup. (It could potentially be used additionally as leverage with our current agency) 

I want to stick to my original plan and get out debt free next year. However he's just ridiculous and I'm not sure whether it's worth the additional months of aggro. Also he still wanted me to pay £400 this month as well so my debt is only dropping by £270- my DMP amount each month at the moment. I've told him already I can't send him any money for the next 2 months as I need to get work done on the car before it's MOT in November. But if I were on my own the first few months would be very very tight (finding a deposit in the budget/car work/mot/christmas) but after that I should have £523 extra a month after everything is paid for. 

Sorry for the brain dump. 



 

WinterWarrior

I would just not send him the money…ever. I got to the point with my ex where I had to just nod and agree and then do my own thing anyway. You don’t owe him that money, he’s bullying you for it just because it’s another stick to beat you with. What’s the worst that can happen? He leaves? You are prepared for that anyway. 

Personally I’d never give up my pets. There must be somewhere else you could move with them if the landlord wants to lose such a good tenant over it. And it wasn’t your fault, but I wouldn’t admit the email went into junk, it’s not worth the agro.