Aspergers/ASD support thread

blue_monkey_2

Hi Ms Piggy,

No not claming anything to be honest, I never realised I could until a few weeks ago but it is weird to think he needs some sort of allowance as I don;t feel he is missing out on anything - we have adjusted ourselves around how he is now so it doesn't feel 'right' that we are entitled to anything. I have thought about mobility but only as we are going to be moving soon (evicted as LL is selling) and it will mean I'll more than likely have to get him to school by car instead of walking and as he has a TA at the moment I want to keep him at this school (depsite my reservations about his teacher!!), but that is the only reason I think I'll need anything.

I hate shopping, I only go when I HAVE to go and I am short of something major as it is such a trauma - esecially now he can escape from the trolley. I used to bribe him with food, LOL, but he easts it so fast these days. I've tried everything - stickers, macdonalds afterwards, magazines, a new toy car, etc... but nothing works so I tend to just stay home. I am not bothered about it - it is weird now when we have to go somewhere after getting him from school. Ayhow I am rambling, I never thought of something I could do to get him to go shopping, maybe I shall have a think on that a bit more to see if there is something else that might get us through the day.

you know I was in church today for the kids concert and there was a a lad in front of us and he could not sit still - I guess he was about 8 - and he knew all the words to the concert but was out of uniform but I just KNEW he has ASD or something similar because he was acting so different to the other children who were all sitting nicely. I don't think i see my son as being that much different until you see children all sitting together nicely where my son would be rolling on the floor and shouting, LOL. I did get a bizarre sense of dread when I thought about it being him sitting there in the pews next year.....

On another note, regarding the teacher telling him about him having to miss the party, I was speaking to another lady at the gates today and she mentioned the concert and I told her I did not take Ryan in and why and she was horrified they should give him that sort of blackmail to behave when they know that he is not just 'acting up'. I also told her that they seemed only to like him on his good days and she said that they clearly needed to learn how to deal with him and his condition instead of trying to bribe him with things happening in the future and also that hauling me aside every other day to tell me he has been naughty is not acceptable and that is what parent eveningsare for. It was nice to get that support as no-one has ever said anything like this before. I was wondering if anyone else had come across the same problems with their school and various teachers.

kit

duchy wrote: »

I used to work as a contractor with-in a global IT consultancy. The company employed a large number of IT analysts-who did a lot of ground breaking work. The vast majority of them were very bright but with poor social skills-yet earned massive salaries. I'd say the majority were undiagnosed AS.

Part of the company I am setting up will be an IT consultancy ....... research shows that people with AS have 100% accuracy ...... we are aiming for testing / analyst work. If you have any good contacts in the area please feel free to pass them my way! We are a community interest company so are not profit making :T

Strapped

kit, where are you based, geographically?

kit

We are in North Somerset. Starting the company here but with an aim to become nationwide to help as many people with AS as possible.

Snaggles

Hiya!

Ryan went to a party yesterday....first one this year! They went to the cinema and then back to the boy's house for a party tea. He really enjoyed it, and I was over the moon, because he very rarely gets any party invitations, and when he does go, he finds them scary and overwhelming, but because this was just going to see a film, it really suited him.

I had a quick chat to the lad's Mum, just to give her a brief idea of the difficulties Ryan might have (just the very very basics) and gave her our phone numbers in case he wouldn't settle, but there were no problems at all. The Mum said her brother is autistic, so she is used to dealing with things like that.

I was sooo happy when he came in, all smiles! Took me aaaaages to get him to bed, but it was worth it!

McSaver

I think I'm gonna need this thread, I Have Aspergers Syndrome Myself

Snaggles

Welcome McSaver! :wave:

It's very interesting to have insights from those who have grown up with this condition. I hope it's not too much of a personal question but were you diagnosed as a child or fairly recently?

ms_piggy

Hi blue monkey

have you heard of the experiment conducted by some mad scientist regarding frogs. He discovered that if you drop a frog into boiling water it jumps out but if you put the frog into normal pond temperature water and then heat it up the frog will stay in the water and cook. Now think about what changes you have had to make, over time, to accomodate your sons needs. You cannot go shopping with him ,can he cope with changes?does he sleep well?can you take him out without worrying what he will do? Just because this is an unseen disability does not mean you cannot claim, it is not morraly wrong-the government puts aside money for this purpose and please if you do apply for these supports get advice on filling them in as they are designed mostly for physical disabilities and the wording is confusing to say the least so needs a translator.
with regard to your point about the teacher yes i have battled with both my son's teachers on many occasions. It sounds as though they are struggling to cope with your son . this is not because he is naughty but because they are not adequately trained to understand the specific difficulties that come with ASD ( check out the nas website and watch their short films ) try suggesting a home school diary where you write things such as a bad night, an upset in the morning or a problem that your son has mentioned then get them to do the same. State that you cannot discuss anyting after school as this is not the appropriate time / your son is distressed etc get them to put stuff in writing so you have proof. (this is your trump card for later)get them to write down your son is being excluded from... because... Then contact your local parent link/ IPSEA ore ACE and ask them for info on disability discrimination because if your son has a diagnosis this is what this behaviour by the school is. Im sorry if I'm coming across as militant but I have seen so many injustices done to these beautiful, fragile and confused kids I am fighting the system. If we ,as their parents dont fight for them who will? Bear in mind the local education authority is only concerned with saving money but if these kids dont get the education they need now statistics show they are more likely than NT kids to end up in prison.
Ok I've had my rant! hope the info helps
PS IPSEA are always very busy so keep pressing the redial allow as long as possible (at least an hour including chat time) but they really know what they are talking about

ms_piggy

squoog
have just read your comment on ASD versus ASC Ihave a big sign on my firdge which says "A cat is not a broken dog" and have also read on a T shirt "you laugh at me because I am different.I pity you because you are all the same" We have always embraced the differences in our family and in others. Many brilliant people are thought to have been autistic: Einstein, Da Vinchi, Charles Rene Mackintosh to name just a few . I have the opinion that these people were not "odd" or "wierd" just ahead of their time in a world that could not cope with them. Also most ASD/C's are very good looking so the people that stigmatise them are probably jealous!

duchy

I came very close to thumping a very experie nced LSA in the staffroom o ne day. She was insisting that one lad was "playing her up" b ecause he was getting upset over something that he usually didn't have a problem with.....I commented that wasn't he ASD and was n't the difference that it had happened in a busier enviroment. She told me it made no difference-and had punished him for it. It all got quite heated as despite training she hadn't got a clue. Adterwards the SENCO (who happens to have an autistic son) told me she was reassigning the woman -away from any ASD kids. All the training in the world can't get some people to understand-whereas some teachers need little or no training. Funnily enough Josh had extraordinarly supportive primary school teachers except one-who had a dyslexic son. I knew we were in for a bad year when she in formed me the first week of term that she knew "All about Aspergers" Funny that-I've been dealing with it as a parent for ten years and also worked with ASD kids in education and feel I've only scratched the surface !!