Aspergers/ASD support thread

fallen_angel_69

i really hope the extra points materilize you have enough to cope with already with ryan you shouldn't be having to cope with this as well i really do not know how you are managing to deal with everything ((((((big hugs ))))) will be thinking of you

blue_monkey_2

I think I am on autopilot if I am honest, just getting through each day and spending the days counting down to the next freesheet (26 hours!!) and hoping there is something suitable for us.

I have these little timescale things I have to write out, I am sure my husband thinks I am nuts in all honesty, but it is like this should happen by xx and if not then we will need to do x on xx and x on xx. And lists, lists of stuff I need to get done, if it is not on the list it does not get done.

Good grief, I really have no clue where my son gets his problems from!!

outrageous_monkey

I dont normally post on here, so I'll give you a breif overview and the if anyone could comment on what I'm about to say, I would like to here other peoples advice.

Ok, so I have a 10yr old son with Aspergers Syndrome, this was diagnosed 3 years ago by a paediatric psychiatrist. For the last 3 years we (me, hubby and local autistic support group) have battled with the LEA to provide a statement for my son. Last November we got an Independant advisor on the case, all of a sudden a N i L was offered, this was turned down cos of is lack of legal substance. Last week I heard that that a statement was had proposed (hurrahh!!!!)....however the statement doesnt seem to match the pen picture the school provided, so its like its written for a different child completely, ie, my son has good understanding of reason - my son has no understanding of reason...etc. I'm not worried about this as my IA picked this up to and is going through the statement with a fine tooth comb, this guy is fantastic.

But my question is, yesterday my son had a SALT assessment, after the assessment the therapist grilled me about how I am towards my son, in the past I have encouraged him to invite friends home for tea.......to try and extend the friendship outside of school. In the past 4 years he has done this about 5 times, so hardly alot. The therapist suggested that I dont do that again as I am putting my son under too much pressure and maybe its ok for him to be on his own....yes, I know some kids like to be on their own, but when my son is crying his heart out because he has no friends because he doesnt understand them, shows to me, he wants to play with other children and NOT play on his own. She also suggested........now, this is the biggie.....that he sits down with his class and he explains what his difficulties are with having Aspergers Syndrome...then his class would then say how they find my son difficult and what they didnt like about him (or the aspies)...I was horrified and couldnt think of anything worse. My son is extremely anxious and can worry over the slightest comment made......so to have a class session like that filled me with dread and I told her you better have some therapy in place afterwards because he will need it. The therapist then said she had proven evidence that it worked with autistic kids....I can see how it would with younger children, but not 10-11 yr old kids.

So if something like that was suggested for your autistic child, would you have had the same horrified reaction as me, or can you see the benefits of this suggestion??

Thanks

fallen_angel_69

i think i would be horrified if some one suggested this about either of my kids at school they did a circle of friendship and encouraged the children who have roughly same interests as my girls to play together this seemed to work for a while then it seems to slip when it has the school leave it for a couple of weeks and reintroduce it sometimesto a structured play this helps like at the moment dd2 and another girl are looking for the phesant in school fields to photograph because they like nature animals and going on bug hunts together

outrageous_monkey

Thanks Fallen

I'm glad its not just me!

The school have tried lots of different ways to get my son to interact with his class during unstructered time. Some have worked some havent. The thing with my son, he has deep obesessions and he wants to play what the latest obesession is, other children will join him but once the other children deviate from his script, he cant handle it. He also likes to rough role play when most lads his age just want to play football or sports type stuff........not many 10 year old boys want to be Donna to his Doctor Who:rotfl:

fallen_angel_69

my dd2 would that's her obession and torchwood at the minute it's driving school mad ,teacher the other day said it was getting bought into everything 2 boys were paired up together to do some work and there intials were put together as jb aand dd2 said isn't it strange you paired them up john barrowmans intials are jb and his new dog is cj We have to watch it on bbc1 and then the repeats on bbc3 as well all her walls have the posters on and everytime i take her to shops she has to see if latest comic is out

eve1962

I can remember in the dark ages a whole gauntlet of diagnoses and cures (only talking 22 years ago). I was a cold mother, he was being abused, he was ADHD, he had severe behavioural problems, he was mentally disturbed etc. Great relief when "experts"decided he had learning difficulties when he was 12 and was sent to a special school away from mainsteam. He flourished there as each child was treted as an individual and there were no targets set by education board. He was actually diagnosed as an Aspie (after I insisted) at fourteen. Moral of the tale is only you and your child are experts, everyone else are merely tourists visiting your world.

DebbieMids72

eve1962 wrote: »

I can remember in the dark ages a whole gauntlet of diagnoses and cures (only talking 22 years ago). I was a cold mother, he was being abused, he was ADHD, he had severe behavioural problems, he was mentally disturbed etc. Great relief when "experts"decided he had learning difficulties when he was 12 and was sent to a special school away from mainsteam. He flourished there as each child was treted as an individual and there were no targets set by education board. He was actually diagnosed as an Aspie (after I insisted) at fourteen. Moral of the tale is only you and your child are experts, everyone else are merely tourists visiting your world.

What a lovely post

My eldest daughter (she is 6, due to be 7 next week) is hopefully (I'm awaiting a decision from the Panel) going to a Special Needs school in September. Half of me is worried, because she'll have to make new friends, (and leave her wonderful teachers), but also half of me is also happy that she will get the one to one attention that she definitely needs.

And a few of my friends have given me great reviews about the school she will be going to. I'm trying my best to think positive, I'm sure that in a year's time, hopefully she will be at the schol, and she will prob come along in leaps and bounds, and do really well

mspig

we are due to go on holiday in June. We have been told that my 4 year old has autism and we are currently undergoing checks to find out just where abouts on the spectrum he is.

Anyhow, was wondering do i have to declare his autism to the holiday insurance?

Also any ideas on what to take on the flight with us to help keep him still and interested in something for the flight(ITS 4.5 hours long)

Any help would be much appreciated.

eve1962

debbiemids special schools bring out the best in our children. Class sizes are smaller meaning far les distractions. Even better fewer kids as a wole so playtimes aren't a battlefield waiting to happen. My son made a lot of friends there- some truly wierd and wonderful! The downside is kids usually attend the school several miles away, can be exhausted from the travelling, and ofcause the fact that their old friends go to different schools. I'm afraid its one of those pay-off situations, you have to lose to gain