Upset re inheritance

Mojisola

dbrookf wrote: »

I don’t think my husband would be overly happy about giving it away... aaarghhh families and money heh?

If you spent so much time looking after your uncle that he felt you were entitled to £50,000, it must have had an impact on the time you had as a couple.

If that's so, then I think your husband had more right to benefit from the money than your sister and I would certainly put his feelings above hers.

tacpot12

dbrookf wrote: »

I said she wants it sharing between the four siblings – not my mother per se.

But why? What is her reason?

dbrookf

tacpot12 wrote: »

But why? What is her reason?

Not sure really! Presuming she thinks it sounds better than asking me for half of mine or something !

TBagpuss

Your uncle was free to leave his money how he wanted, and he chose to recognise the support you provided to him.

Neither you, nor your mother or other aunts or uncles owes your sister any part of their inheritance.

Your mum has already, very generously, given her £10K so even if your sister was seeking the money because she is in financial difficulty, she has had help.

Don't let your sister manipulate you into giving up your inheritance.

[Deleted User]

Mojisola asked how much help your sister had given to your uncle. Did she help him at all? (Sorry if you answered that already but I couldn't spot it).

lisyloo

Appreciate you don’t want to upset your sister (she’s being manipulative), but do consider your husbands point of view.
He should be higher priority than her.
Sometimes you have to exercise tough love.
Actually a gift from your uncle to you is none of your sisters business.
There are ways to deal with this politely (easier said than done as I know family push your buttons and I’m the worst), so prepare some answers in advance e.g.

I really don’t want to fall out about this with you but actually what my uncle did with his money is none of your business.
I really don’t want to fall out with you about this but it’s our money, Fred (husband) and I will decide but I don’t want to be continually badgered about it.

dbrookf

Dilbert999 wrote: »

Mojisola asked how much help your sister had given to your uncle. Did she help him at all? (Sorry if you answered that already but I couldn't spot it).

No, but to be fair I lived closer than she did...

[Deleted User]

She could have helped in other ways - I live 7 hours away from my parents, and I handle their finances (POA) and take them on holiday and call regularly, and see them Bank Holidays/Christmas. My siblings live near them so I like to do what I can to help.
If your sister has done none of these for your uncle, why does she think she should dis-respect your uncle's wishes?

dbrookf

I really appreciate you all taking the time out to give me some feedback/reassurance. It’s certainly helping to get my mind round this!

dbrookf

Dilbert999 wrote: »

She could have helped in other ways - I live 7 hours away from my parents, and I handle their finances (POA) and take them on holiday and call regularly, and see them Bank Holidays/Christmas. My siblings live near them so I like to do what I can to help.
If your sister has done none of these for your uncle, why does she think she should dis-respect your uncle's wishes?

Don’t think it’s anything about disrespecting anyone’s wishes. She probably deep down thinks that I should give her half probably.... just because we are sisters!