Easter 2025 I’m coming to get you!

Hettyhound

Remember I mentioned turning a corner above? Well I've come to the conclusion I'm going to have to speed things up (for reasons of safety) which obviously means I've got to pay and therefore the mortgage over payments will take the hit. My son and I are both suffering so I've taken matters into my own hands. Saw the GP a week ago and they want him assessing for both ADHD and Autism. We are using the Right to Choose pathway so should get assessed in 4-6 weeks. Unfortunately there is no shared care agreement for under 18s regarding medication so if that is a recommendation the GP then gets us added to the CAMHS wait list for medications assessment. They don't know the current wait list times but I'm expecting minimum 6-12 months. Still I will have a diagnosis to give to the school and we are effectively saving 2-3 years on the standard CAMHS ADHD assessment wait list by doing Right to Choose. Even if you are assessed by CAMHS you then still have to go onto the medication wait list. GP said CAMHS medication list accept RtC assessments because they are carried out by NHS registered services rather than a private provider. Second thing is I'm going to pay for him to have a dyslexia assessment. The only way to get one is to pay, you cannot get them via any other means (some schools will screen put its not a full assessment required for legal support in exams etc). Had one quote back and waiting for another; £550 and earliest assessment appointment is mid November. Thirdly, I'm going to pay for very expensive EMDR therapy with a registered psychologist to treat his adoption trauma. This was the therapy I though we were going to do via the Adoption Support Fund rather than Sensory Integration (which is having no effect on him at all). The therapist I had the initial (free!) chat with seemed very supportive and knowledgeable so I've signed a form to get him added to her wait list (which is early December start date). She is probably the therapist we would have been sent to anyway as she's trained in Child and adolescent EMDR and provides services through the ASF. He is so unhappy which makes me very sad, but he just doesn't know why he feels the way he does. Anyway we will be tightening our belts (well mine) even more and no doubt many arguments will be had………

slm6002

We ended up paying for a dyslexia test for my DS after the school refused to admit anything was wrong. Once we had the diagnosis they said ah yes we thought so, but we dont have the funding to assess them. They could still have put things in place without the diagnosis - we changed schools not long after and they were much better.

We have also this week put our referral in for RtoC autism and ADHD testing for DS. He is 18 now but would still like to know for sure if this really is what he has.

It is tough, expensive and waiting lists are long but hopefully you will start making the journey to a happier DS soon.

carboot_karaoke

So sorry to hear the struggles you and DS are experiencing especially on your own😔.

I was initially reluctant to seek an autism diagnosis for young CK but finally 3 years after starting the process we received one. It actually mattered more to them then l thought and should help in getting support. We are on the R to C waitlist for ADHD which keeps been extended due to high demand and lack of funding.

For what its worth l think your doing the right thing, you and sons health & happiness is more important than being mortgage free

CK x

Hettyhound

Mortgage day and a small overpayment. Mortgage is now under £11K standing at £10,965.

KajiKita

Well done on the today's OP and I agree with you on needing calm, sanity, feeling safe and happy being more important than finishing off the mortgage. The mortgage is so tiny now too! 😊

Hope all the testing happens as swiftly as it can and the adoption trauma work brings him (and you) some peace of mind.

KK

Hettyhound

Hello everyone. I've made a final August OP today (payday) of £80 so my mortgage is now £10,885. I can't believe the kids still have nearly 2 weeks before they go back to school. I think I have got everything for him to go back to school and I have been told he should get free school meals now due to a change in Universal Credit limits. All of this will help. I've made a cake and some flapjacks today and I also did a fruited tea loaf for the freezer. I've been food shopping this morning as its payday but bought very little fruit as what was on offer didn't look very fresh. I've downloaded the Li6l app today so I'll have trip to them for fruit and veg as it always seems better if we pop in there. I didn't have the app so never bothered doing my big shop there but will have a nosey round when I visit for fruit. I've got another 10km race in 2 weeks so will be doing my last long run before it on Sunday. Aiming to do 7 miles which is just over 12 km.; I'll just stick with 5k between then and run day. I've spotted a couple of other runs to book that are a different challenge. No movement on getting testing done due to school being off to 9th September. I've filled in some ADHD forms but had nothing about Autism and one of the Dyslexia assessors has never come back to me. Life has been really hard over the summer holidays but hopefully help will be arriving soon. Trying to balance over payments and savings and also get a handle on grocery bills. My dishwasher has now completely broken but I've decided not to replace it at the moment. I've only had one for the last 10 years so I'll go back to washing up liquid and rubber gloves!