I will cut my coat according to my cloth. {Edited by Forum team} 2019

beanielou

Good vibes for DS & a job nearer to home.

Polly~~Lots of positive vibes to you & your DD for tomorrow.
JUst having a tough time at the moment ::o

Savvy_sewing

beanielou wrote: »

Good vibes for DS & a job nearer to home.

Polly~~Lots of positive vibes to you & your DD for tomorrow.
JUst having a tough time at the moment ::o

The closest pub has asked for a CV and DS is planning to do one today and drop it off. Progress.
Sorry to see your having a tough time Beanielou. I hope that things start to improve for you now, and not to soon enough.

I didn't sleep as well as my last few nights, my mind was all over the place from about 11.30 till 4am. Some really intense dreams where I was very emotional and stressed in them, with a lot of faces from the past 40 years of my life appearing in a crowded room, revisited a very traumatic event from many years ago so I woke about 6.15 quite glad to wake up out of it.

The lad woke at 6.30 and came bounding in to tell me it's morning and the baby woke about 30 minutes ago but he sat happily babbling nonsense for a while before his Dad came to get him.
I remembered to set up my teasmade so I am sitting in bed updating this with a cup of tea, and will wake Dgd in 5 minutes.

Today is my time to see Mum, do her bed etc. And take her shopping.
I may not be needed for my babysitting duties at Biggest's as I think her hubby is at home today, unless he gets an emergency call from anywhere in the world to go fix their factory software!

My plan is to try to enjoy the day, put the exgf out of my mind, even though in the night I found myself mentally writing her a letter telling her how I feel about her use of the children as weapons and how after 5 years of trying to understand her, or sympathise with her, I could no longer be bothered with her!
(That's how my brain works!), in the middle of the night when I should be asleep I word letters, etc!!
I have no intention of really writing her a letter.

Time to wake Dgd for school. I must remember to give her £2 for school disco tickets today as the disco is tomorrow.
At least I don't have to worry about what she will wear, it will be jeans or joggers and a t shirt!

hb2

Polly, I hope today goes as well as possible. These assessments are vile - we spend most of our time trying to think about the things we can do, so being forced to relate , in detail, the things we can't can be very upsetting.

Mooloo, I'm glad you have work coming in. Fingers crossed that DS gets work locally.

pollyanna_26

Ive been one for composing letters and having conversations in my head when various situations have been hurtful. Twice I've sat down and written those letters and taken them into the garden and burned them. It doesn't change the past but it gets everything out and is healing.


Hope you enjoy your time with mum and don't need to babysit. Good luck to ds.


Love and light to you beanie. My mantra is This too shall pass so I'm hoping for better times for you.Take care and be kind to yourself.


hb2 I know exactly what you mean . Having to focus and talk about the downsides wipes out any feelings of moving forward . I firmly believe medical evidence should decide these things as it did in the past.


Thank you all for your good wishes see you on the other side!
pollyx

beanielou

pollyanna_26 wrote: »

Ive been one for composing letters and having conversations in my head when various situations have been hurtful. Twice I've sat down and written those letters and taken them into the garden and burned them. It doesn't change the past but it gets everything out and is healing.


Hope you enjoy your time with mum and don't need to babysit. Good luck to ds.


Love and light to you beanie. My mantra is This too shall pass so I'm hoping for better times for you.Take care and be kind to yourself.


hb2 I know exactly what you mean . Having to focus and talk about the downsides wipes out any feelings of moving forward . I firmly believe medical evidence should decide these things as it did in the past.


Thank you all for your good wishes see you on the other side!
pollyx

This is so blooming true. It is certainly not food for the soul.
Thanks polly for your lovely message.

Savvy_sewing

I have had a good day with Mum. We did some of my business chores first and last. Stopping to collect the wadding and curtain lining I needed for a couple of jobs, and then went to Rushden lakes, with a visit to Primarni for some clothes for the boys, so we don't have to have stress from exgf, from now on they will go home in what they came in, and we will put our things on them as soon as we get them home, so we sent the majority of the clothes we had here back to her today.
Then I bought myself some new undies and Mum got a blouse, then a cardigan In H&M, then we had lunch in one of the restaurants there. It was quite nice so we sat outside to eat. Then on to collect my mended sewing machines, before coming home.
I am pretty tired and could easily go to bed now, but obviously it's a little too early.
DS has just gone out, and Dgd has been fed. I just had a sandwich as I had enough for lunch.
She has managed to get through a dance class with out injuries at least.

Here is hoping for a restful evening as I don't have to babysit either.
I was going to do the account but I really don't think I have the energy so it will have to wait.

beanielou

Glad that you have had a better day

pollyanna_26

That sounds like a good day Mooloo getting out and about having time in the sun and sorted work needs too.


Hopefully the clothes situation will no longer be a feature of future meetings now you've sent "her " stuff back.


Today was quite positive . It started quite stressful as I phoned our taxi driver already booked in advance and his mobile was on answer service . Left him a message asking if he was still ok for today and it was 2 hours before he phoned back . Family emergency meant he'd only just got my message and was unable to take us.


He offered to contact another driver dd is well used to and he agreed to take us. I was trying to get through to the assessment centre to check there were no problems with todays assessor and they weren't picking up . I gave up trying them . 2nd driver then phoned to say he'd been pulled off by the firm for a job to Manchester airport and couldn't take us.


We had 15 mins before we needed to leave so had to order a cab and take pot luck on the driver . He turned up quickly but was fairly new and not sure about working to another county and finding his way. No sat nav so it was quite an experience . We hit roadworks and traffic was backed up . They were letting 3 cars through and then switching back to prolonged red



He did manage to get us there 5 minutes before the time of the appt as I always build in a buffer for hold ups. I'd been doing the calm and collected but was inwardly worried we'd be late . DD was stressed and anxious . Lovely woman on reception said assessor was running late and it would be a one hour wait. We were the only people in the waiting room . Luckily we were seen within 20 mins.


Lovely experienced nurse. She explained she'd been reading not only the form but the Drs and Consultants letters and surprisingly the original DLA to PIP assessment and evidence.


She ended up going back to childhood asking us to explain how things had been both physically and mentally over the years . She asked questions and listened carefully especially about the long fight for the correct diagnosis .


She didn't examine any of dds joints but noted the flare of the Psoriasis rash and the swollen joints. Physically she asked dd to try moving head shoulders etc but not if it would cause pain . She didn't make her move to the examination bed in fact she seemed understanding of the difficulties and told her to stay in her chair.


I have a positive feeling about this . It's up to the decision maker but I hope they will be guided by the report.


Phoned our local taxi firm to go home and they came quickly . A driver we've known for years who'd taken all the shortcuts and avoided the delays .


We got home , ate something and I've been summoning up the energy to post . If we don't sleep tonight I'll want to know why.


Sleep well all , thoughts with Beanie and those having a difficult time.
pollyx

beanielou

Well that was an experience polly getting there but glad it seemed to go well & you have a positive feeling.
Thank you for thinking of me polly xx

Both_Feet_on_Terra_Firma

Mega catch up as i work abroad a lot so i may have missed the answers to my questions. Its great news that DS is actively seeking more hours closer to home work but I wonder who will have the boys while he is working as bar work is notoriously evenings and weekends and if you are going to be working from home in future these would be your busiest times for fittings /discussions it worries me that you will need to sacrifice your business to look after these boys . I was surprised that as things are so acrimonious with the mum that a contact centre is not being used for pick up and drop offs surely that would be in DS best interest as any poor behaviour would be noted and recorded . Glad you had a good day with mum yesterday