I will cut my coat according to my cloth. {Edited by Forum team} 2019

ckmuir1

Please Mooloo - don't talk to your son - TELL your son that the current set up is not working for YOU and TELL him the changes you are putting in place. TELL him what he has to do and also TELL him the new routine that suits YOU in YOUR OWN house. TELL him this will be the way it is and it is not up for discussion. Take back the control. Wishing you all the luck and courage x

hb2

Mooloo, I'm sorry you have been feeling so overwhelmed The others have said it all, and better than I could have. Please don't let this situation continue as it is because that elastic band is very near to breaking - and who will pick up the pieces then?

Savvy_sewing

I am not so productive at work, that's definitely what's affected at the moment. Careworker was at home when I got in. She spoke to me about tomorrow's meeting and suggested that we make notes of even the trivial things that we are aware of.
I will try to make notes later.
DS fed the children and got the baby to bed before he went to work. I will be putting the lad up in a minute, we are just finishing watching a cartoon on Netflix.
Dgd is very quiet, and subdued as her teacher rang me after school to say she was tired and unkempt today. She had left here clean and tidy. But she did have difficulty sleeping last night and had said so this morning. I think like me she is worried about things, even though we went through it carefully and told her that she didn't have to worry. And another nod to the book. I hope that she sleeps better tonight!
I hope that I will as well.

LKRDN_Morgan

Is she on her Xbox again at night? Not sure if she’s got a phone but could she be using that a night as well?

Savvy_sewing

LKRDN_Morgan wrote: »

Is she on her Xbox again at night? Not sure if she’s got a phone but could she be using that a night as well?

Sometimes she has but ironically last night she wasn't. She just couldn't sleep. But that could have also been a result of her being poorly at the end of the week and hardly surfaced Saturday at all.

hb2

I hope you both/all had a better night Mooloo.

Savvy_sewing

I was up a little bit but not too bad.
I have just stopped at work for a cuppa, I've filled my trolley full of work and about to go home to prepare for my meeting.

Parkrunner25

DGD is likely quiet and subdued because she's been here before. Didn't she call twin 2's sons "her boys" and struggle when they were adopted out? The current situation is likely bringing a lot of that back.That on top of SATS, a looming move to secondary school, and having recently had a visit to her mum and half siblimgs, there's likely a lot running through her head right now.

pollyanna_26

Parkrunner25 wrote: »

DGD is likely quiet and subdued because she's been here before. Didn't she call twin 2's sons "her boys" and struggle when they were adopted out? The current situation is likely bringing a lot of that back.That on top of SATS, a looming move to secondary school, and having recently had a visit to her mum and half siblimgs, there's likely a lot running through her head right now.

This has been going through my mind a lot recently.Reading today she'd left for school tidy and clean but was in school tired and unkempt raises alarm bells .


I know she has had support and counselling in the past but it seems she needs deeper help to help her come to terms with the past.
Her life has been a lot of losing people whether permanently or partially . Her cousins have gone, her mum she sees from time to time, your dad died Mooloo and she loved her grandad .She now has two little boys and is worried for them.

You have been the constant in her life but she will be aware you are exhausted , struggling to sleep and worried . Somehow she may fear losing you .
When I posted a while ago that I believed SS were returning the boys too soon from the foster carers you were thinking the same .
It's obvious DS is making it difficult for a calm environment at home .
Most youngsters struggle with the transition to senior school and I would try to access proper psychiatric adolescent help for her . She will need to work through her fears and feelings and a book wont do that. She needs someone not emotionally involved.
pollyx

spirit

pollyanna_26 wrote: »

This has been going through my mind a lot recently.Reading today she'd left for school tidy and clean but was in school tired and unkempt raises alarm bells .


I know she has had support and counselling in the past but it seems she needs deeper help to help her come to terms with the past.
Her life has been a lot of losing people whether permanently or partially . Her cousins have gone, her mum she sees from time to time, your dad died Mooloo and she loved her grandad .She now has two little boys and is worried for them.

You have been the constant in her life but she will be aware you are exhausted , struggling to sleep and worried . Somehow she may fear losing you .
When I posted a while ago that I believed SS were returning the boys too soon from the foster carers you were thinking the same .
It's obvious DS is making it difficult for a calm environment at home .
Most youngsters struggle with the transition to senior school and I would try to access proper psychiatric adolescent help for her . She will need to work through her fears and feelings and a book wont do that. She needs someone not emotionally involved.
pollyx

I would also be alarmed at her appearance by the time she got to school.

The worrying thing is that there are so many predators out there who prey on vulnerable kids, those who perhaps are living a chaotic lifestyle and get sucked in by on line predators. If you don't already, you must check her phone and Xbox for such conversations - daily.