I will cut my coat according to my cloth. {Edited by Forum team} 2019

Savvy_sewing

I am feeling a lot better today. I can turn my head to the right more now, although left is more of an issue. I have used Fenbid Gel and taken Paracetamol. I was awake from 4.30 unsurprising considering I slept on and off yesterday. So I was writing down my thoughts for about an hour before the household woke up.
I have tried to talk with DS about the routine and schedule etc as I am concerned that the children (and him) use technology all too easily and don't get out and about enough. That we really need to have more focus and structure moving forward and waiting in limbo for the next official rules etc is not helping us. He listened, but didn't really respond much however he has finally taken the kids out to the park for a little while.
So I have some peace and quiet from the screaming. They wind each other up constantly and it is a battle if we are stuck in the house.
He has managed to get the next two weeks shifts sorted out which is a bonus. So I am going to plan to "go out to work " in the cabin at 10am tomorrow onwards and try to find my mojo for sewing. I have a cabin to pay for and a cabin full of materials and sewing stuff to use after all.
It's as mentioned, we need routine, structure and a plan moving forward.
I shouldn't feel that I have lost everything, I should be embracing that I have family around me, that I have the ability to be adaptable and that if I have always managed to figure it out in the past, that I can figure it out now.
Portugal May have to move off of the immediate agenda, but as I have had to use the money this year then it would have had to be postponed anyway.
Moving forward into the next year and new decade should be a positive thing.
Early in the year we should be able to have more clarity and soon life will be ours again and not governed by the powers that be.
It has been a very bumpy ride because it has not been plain sailing with the family coming here. But as school starts next week things will settle, and hopefully once things are official we will all know where we are.
Then I just need to find that Mojo and earn enough to at least keep the ability to have Tax Credits until I earn enough not to have to have them at all.
It is still my goal to get off of any type of benefit. Although I could have claimed housing benefits I don't and that's been a blessing as I don't have to keep producing my budget etc to the council. Although I believe that social will still require it.
I have a small plan. That's better than I felt about things a few days ago.
Cup of tea time. While all is quiet it won't last long!

Savvy_sewing

Slowly worked through the day, am moving better than I was this morning and hopefully I will be better tomorrow.
New Years Eve!! Eek
Despite all the ups and downs it has been another terrifyingly fast year with so many twists and turns.
I still haven't mastered the art of saying no to the adult children.
I still haven't taken enough steps to reduce the debt.
I have practically closed the business and I am now a foster carer rather than a business owner. My business was a hobby originally and now it seems that it will be again.
At least we didn't have any more new babies in the mix.
I have only one credit card debt left, on 0%, and a small savings pot for the start of the year.
I don't have ambitious plans left,
I don't have regrets.
I have begun a new chapter on a slow burn which will properly become the way of life when the courts finalise things in the end somewhere in the front end of the year.
I have stopped the fight in my head. I think I have found peace finally with the decision and I will alter the course of my sail accordingly.
I think the cut of my coat was a little too uncomfortable in 2019,
And my faith was stretched out of all recognition.
I don't imagine 2020 will be an easy year and I doubt that the decade will be plain sailing. I do know who my friends are and who I can talk to and who have disappeared when the going got tough.
But we get 365 chances at a new day dawning every year, and each one will have its own rewards.
I hope that I settle my fears down, that everyone here have their best years to come and that the new year will bring invigorating hope to everyone.
I am off to sleep now. Hopefully it will be a good night tonight.
Tomorrow I am going to get back in the Cabin.

berrybug

Savvy sewing I read your posts daily but seldom comment your are doing a fantastic job all round I just dropped in to suggest a possible new name for your thread
How about Sewing and stitching my family together with love

24ta

Delurking,
Your plans have changed dramatically this year, as you have put your plans on hold to rescue your family, hopefully when authorities finalise their decisions you can make your new plan.
Wishing you a happy and healthy 2020.

Savvy_sewing

Yes everything seems to be in limbo.
I did make it out to my Cabin and sewed for two hours.
But it wasn't all plain sailing and I had enough work for my arm for one day.

I was going to walk to the shop for fresh bread and butter but it was raining so I went in the car. It's a far darker day than I like. I would happily stay watching movies for the rest of the day, but I have said I would go and see Biggest. So after lunch we will venture out.

Savvy_sewing

berrybug wrote: »

Savvy sewing I read your posts daily but seldom comment your are doing a fantastic job all round I just dropped in to suggest a possible new name for your thread
How about Sewing and stitching my family together with love

Thankyou
I must admit I hadn't thought about a new name, especially as I have currently lost my sewing mojo. But it certainly is a possibility if I go sewing related.

berrybug

Savvy sewing no matter what life throws at you I’m sure your never very far from your sewing machine ,needles and threads because even if your not sewing to earn a little extra I’m sure the little one will produce plenty mending for you .
All the best for 2020

hb2

Ss, as someone who tends to be rather inflexible, I really admire your ability to adapt and change your plans when needed. I hope that 2020 is a year when you get some stability in your life and also brings you great joy.

Savvy_sewing

I went to see Biggest with Dgd. We stopped for a chat and a cuppa. When I got home apparently we had had an unscheduled visitor from the Social. I hope he wasn't too fussy as the place was rather messy when I got home. I am sure DS doesn't see the mess around him.!
We're all ship shape now as while I was preparing dinner I had a plan of attack and the front room was sorted, the washing up tackled, the bathroom restored (ish) when we are using it to dry the washing.
Eldest boys bed changed again!
All the bedrooms except mine have had a quick tidy up ready for the new year. I will tidy the washing that's in my room as soon as the children are in bed.
DS has done to work and Dgd has retired to her Xbox.
Hopefully in another hour calm and peace will reign over the rest of the evening.
I have got to get some tactics for the screaming I am sure the new neighbours will be selling up if it carries on much longer.
The eldest taunts the little one all the time. Thank goodness for such things as school. I doubt that I would have the patience for home schooling.

I have accepted my life is going to be different, possibly difficult and that's ok.
I still believe in my ability to figure things out.
I just think that it might take me a bit longer.

Savvy_Sue

Screaming: I used to sing at mine. Nonsense songs: "what shall we do with the screaming baby" to the tune of "what shall we do with the drunken sailor " for example.

They would beg me to stop, and I would if they would. ;-)