Life changing issue and I do not what to do

Rubik

username12345678 wrote: »

Y
Be there for you child (you will have rights that come with the obligations) .

He will only have parental responsibility if he is named on the birth certificate, for which he will need to present at the birth registration. Or he later makes an application to court for PR if his name isn't on the BC.

Username91

Rubik wrote: »

He will only have parental responsibility if he is named on the birth certificate, for which he will need to present at the birth registration. Or he later makes an application to court for PR if his name isn't on the BC.

I intend to go and register my name on the birth certificate but I want a paternity test before hand.

Username91

username12345678 wrote: »

You are clearly prepared to meet your financial obligations to the child which is of course right and proper.

My advice in regards to being forced to move in is run and don't look back.

Be there for you child (you will have rights that come with the obligations) but you definitely do not owe this woman a relationship.

I am not going to move in at all. I just can't even be in her presence without feeling sick, I puked at her house and she just smiled. It does not make any sense how she can be so calm about this situation.

charlotte1994

Red-Squirrel wrote: »

Eh? What is the app tracking then? The implant stops your cycle so you don't get pregnant.

If only! Not for everyone, only a percentage get a complete stop. Most women still have a period (the pill stops periods as far as I'm aware)

charlotte1994

spadoosh wrote: »

No one thinks or has suggested you should sacrifice your sex life if you dont want children though, you made it up.

They literally said he should have abstained from penetrative sex? How did I make that up?

thorsoak

p00hsticks wrote: »

sorry. but this doesn't wash with me - if you were adamant that you didn't want children then you should have worn a condom, or even abstained from full penetrative sex altogether, regardless of whether (she said) she was on the pill.


It's too late for you now, but perhaps some others reading this may think more carefully....

Yes - it was suggested ....but I find it sad that today, sex comes before a relationship, before trust has been shared - but there again, I'm old :cool:

moneyistooshorttomention

Username91 wrote: »

I intend to go and register my name on the birth certificate but I want a paternity test before hand.

That paternity test sounds like a very good idea to me.

I'd be shocked in your position that she had lied to me this way and it does sound like she might be trying to blackmail you with the way she says "All or nothing - either move in with me or forget the whole idea of any contact with the child". She thinks she has an ace in her hand to pressurise you with - ie dangling British nationality in front of your nose. That does not say much about her either.

Certainly if she's prepared to lie - as she has clearly done (with the way she told you she was on the Pill and then proceeded not to take some of them) then who knows just what other lies she is prepared to tell. So - yes...do check as to whether a paternity test might show up it's some other man she's used instead of yourself.

I bet she will be off to our Child Support Agency to try and get payments out of you anyway - so being able to prove you weren't the father (if that is the case) would stop that in its tracks. Fingers crossed for you that she isn't going to use the CSA if it turns out you are the father.

No wonder you don't trust her after all this.

(In reply to a previous poster - yes...I am a woman and I think it's important for those of us who are more fair-minded to say "Not all women are like this. Some of us wouldn't dream of treating a man as an unwilling/unknowing sperm bank").

spadoosh

charlotte1994 wrote: »

They literally said he should have abstained from penetrative sex? How did I make that up?

You made up the part where you insinuated the poster had suggested that people who dont want children shouldnt have sex.

They highlighted that the best way of not getting someone pregnant was to not have penetrative sex with them. Please tell me a better way? Ive never got anyone pregnant who i didnt have penetrative sex with.

Lets flip this on its head for you to hopefully show you where im coming from.

Are you saying lesbians who dont use dildo's dont have a sex life? How insulting that you suggest penetrative sex is the only way you can have a sex life.

You never said anything of the sort did you? Im using the fact that you where ambiguous in your post and using the lack of what you said to imply something you didnt.

Comms69

Rubik wrote: »

He will only have parental responsibility if he is named on the birth certificate, for which he will need to present at the birth registration. Or he later makes an application to court for PR if his name isn't on the BC.

It is also possible to re-register a birth if the mother agrees

Red-Squirrel_2

charlotte1994 wrote: »

If only! Not for everyone, only a percentage get a complete stop. Most women still have a period (the pill stops periods as far as I'm aware)

Its supposed to stop you ovulating, if you're still having regular true periods maybe it isn't working properly. I know some women get a bit of spotting but most I know on it (including myself) get nothing.