taking responsibilty to get me where I want to be

efes_shareholder

Seasidegal58 said:

I do think you are going to blow sooner or later - I know I would. Perhaps you should mention it to NM. He  knows how you feel - and I'm pretty sure MC had an idea of it too before today. He's just not bothering to acknowledge it in the hope he can carry on as he is. I think it was wrong of NM to go behind your back and leave the key outside for MC without telling you. I understand it's his son and he's probably worried about him but it's not as if he's a teenager. He has what I can see decent money coming in - enough to sort out his life for the near future. It's a shame about his kids but that's not your fault. In fact if his ex does decide to let him see them soon then it will revert back to you having them there weekends which isn't what you ever wanted for the long term. It's going to put even more pressure on you and your relationship.  MC should be looking to rent a flat in order that when he does finally get to have his children there's somewhere for them.

Humdinger1 said:

Yup, all of the above that @Seasidegal58 says. NM needs to have your back here.  I wonder if MC's ex has  a similar story to tell.  NM can give moral support to MC that's not at your expense.   Maybe he feels in an impossible situation but it's not that.   Love Humdinger xx 

Thank you , for your wise words as always.

Its possible he heard some , its difficult to tell but to be honest I've thrown it in the F bucket and I don't really care since it was nothing I wouldn't say to him.

I did say to NM I wanted to wait a few days until there is any conversation - few reasons , the holiday blues , the fact hes been burning the candle and exhausted all money ( he made a statement to the effect yesterday evening) and so not to jump on him as soon as he is back.

We did sit in the garden and have a little chat about the new women - he said a few things re her that to me were potential red flags but I am a naturally suspicious about most people - anyone can say what they are , time will tell if they are.
He also spoke about wanting to come off the tools and be more of the director of the work and generating his own work rather then relying on others , we went from leaflets and business cards to target the local area to the price of properties in the area the new women lives ................Tax return needs to be done first !! It was a very rambled , jumbled conversation and wasn't much of a plan but it felt important to listen to just get an idea on where his head was. I got the impression he knew he had to sort himself out but hes had far too much drugs and alcohol in ibiza to process it.

He did spend his time at home yesterday so tidy his room up etc so I am glad that has finally been done even if he let slip that the new women had berated him and told him to sort it out as he isn't a child !!!!!

I do feel that NM is onboard with me , he just takes the easy route and tends not to say too much incase it sends me off on a tangant.

I didnt eat the curry chicken i made last night as my stomach was just so gassy - I am really hopeful I don't have a similar day today as after an hour in the gym this morning i am already hungry !!

Had to do a pit stop before i started work for some almond milk and daily bread so today has been a spend !!

Newstartforme

Hope you are OK today ES , you have been exceptionally patient , time to reclaim your house . Hope your stomach remains settled xx

efes_shareholder

Newstartforme said:

Hope you are OK today ES , you have been exceptionally patient , time to reclaim your house . Hope your stomach remains settled xx

sadly the stomach seems very much the same as yesterday 

it could be slight stress/anxiety although I've had it a week or so ................looks like my luck with Biomel was a bit of a fluke