taking responsibilty to get me where I want to be

efes_shareholder

Kitten868 said:

Oh my lovely lady. I'm so sorry for all that's going on. Even the pigging car. Who needs that drama. 
Still though it sounds like your social life is starting back up again and that sounds good. I know its hard but I find you fall back into it all. Do your lateral flow tests and be sensible but enjoy yourself. Don't let the anxiety win.
I hope that the referrals start coming through for carers. 
Keep going xxx

Car appears to be sorted , no charge and rightly so 
I’m doing my tests just kind of wish testing was compulsory and people didn’t rely on COVID passports
still no news on extra care visit , 3 weeks on xx

Buffythedebtslayer

I am sending love Efes, I hope you have a peaceful weekend. 

Really don't know what else to say. But I really am sending loveXXX

cafelady

Hi Efes. I saw in your earlier post that you are trying gluten free food out. Have you had a coeliac test? If you haven’t had one yet, it’s really important to not give up gluten ahead of your test. See this link for more info: https://www.coeliac.org.uk/information-and-support/coeliac-disease/getting-diagnosed/

It’s also possible to have a negative blood test for coeliac and to still have it. See the article for more details x

efes_shareholder

cafelady said:

Hi Efes. I saw in your earlier post that you are trying gluten free food out. Have you had a coeliac test? If you haven’t had one yet, it’s really important to not give up gluten ahead of your test. See this link for more info: https://www.coeliac.org.uk/information-and-support/coeliac-disease/getting-diagnosed/

It’s also possible to have a negative blood test for coeliac and to still have it. See the article for more details x

ive been tested a couple of times and never found to be coeliac . that said my digestion is slowly improving and pain more tolerable

efes_shareholder

my auntie finally passed away last night.
There is still in element of shock across the family that these two beautiful souls are no longer with us and an element of sadness that they were so determined not to consider the full impact of this virus and how dangerous it could be , they were sadly convinced it was no worse then a winter flu ( having had that , it can be pretty harsh ) 
Now just need my cousin to know we are all here to support her and help her navigate her loss.

had my scan friday evening , quite a pleasant experience , headphones with magic music and just shut my eyes and relaxed - almost a shame when it was over as I was just dosing off!! 
popped to the shop on my way home for vape fluid and somehow left my new iphone on the counter off the shop , so lucky for me that the young girl behind me was honest and rushed out of the store to return it to me , my head really is up my bum off late.

saturday I pottered around the house and did a few jobs , came to nm's just for an hour and then as he was working a door at an event picked my friend and took her for a free night out once mum was settled. It was a bit of a dull affair , not helped that she got sick on the way home and i had to stop twice for her to vomit , meant the car needed cleaning yesterday

Yesterday was a spendy day , did a bit of xmas shopping with my daughter and then took NM and her to dinner , 30% off at beefeater so not so terrible but with hair and nails this week , i need to monitor the spends a bit 

efes_shareholder

health anxiety is a bit through the roof , we seem to know more and more people testing positive including a friend who my sister went on a walk with last thursday 
sister and I both donw LFT's which are negative , sister is having a pcr this afternoon and I'm inclined to do the same if I can find a drive in which operates out of office hours

Sister was in charge of mum last night , maybe OTT but i've asked her to strip the bed and anti bacced the surfaces just in case - i think i'm going over board but last thing we need is a whole house of it

I'll feel alot better when her PCR test is back

It just makes me so anxious for the winter , NM won't vax , that concerns me and obviously mum was be in severe problems if she somehow got it.

I'm due at a weekend away this weekend where NM is working the door , im not planning on being overly social but it really concerns me how many people cling on to their double vaxed status and dont just test before they go .................seen so much to confirm this on social media

i dont think i can do a whole winter of this , for me the situation feels worse then ever as people are left with their own common sense with the problem and it appears to be lacking !!

anyway , need fuel again - seem to have used a lot despite not really going anywhere 

I have a week off work from thursday , i dont think ive ever looked forward to something so much !!

efes_shareholder

I've had enough for today I really have

Drove to covid test site well in advance for 8am , for the centre to open late and then have to sit in the school run traffic coming back until 9am 
Had booked nail appt during my lunch at 12 ( lunch , what lunch ! ) and good job I messaged as she had forgotten my nails and gone shopping , Luckily I've got in at the salon tomorrow but its double the price.
can't be too cross about that one as last time it was me that forgot 

Next door have bought a rabbit and the flipping dog does not stop barking at it , constantly , yapping barking which suppliers were picking up on the phone earlier , its driving me mad.
Tried calling over the fence to them and was ignored , wanted to go and knock but mum said not too so I've been a proper horrible sneaky neighbour and reported it to the council 

Went down about an hour ago to do my lunch and ask mum if she wanted anything , she didnt but within minutes of me being upstairs , an "accident" had happened , I could smell it !! Mum asked me to bring her scissors which I did and promptly stepped in a puddle of poop in the hall which she had thrown tissue over .............bare foot ! maybe one day I will laugh about it , but today will not be that day

Came upstairs to clean my feet and finish my lunch before the stench took over !! ( knowing i would be going back for a clean up operation ) , shes trying to clean up the carpet in the hallway with the floor broom ( that needs to now go in the bin ) 
I told her off , I have to admit as when i asked why she was using the broom , she said she would wash it ( ridiculous) , Ive had to clean the bathroom , the hallway , mum , change her clothes and said to her I wish you had warned me that there was a mess in the hall , she replied " I know , you wish I was dead" and then told me to move out !!

I'm just not in the mood but I have no choice , I'm behind on work because of the test centre and had to try and focus with the dog yapping next door and then that was the straw , well its not the straw I then get a message in our family group chat suggesting a game we can all play at xmas
and my neices piping up that we have to have a normal xmas and the best one we can for nan 
I get that I really do , but a normal xmas is completely unrealistic when there is no seating in the lounge other then an arm chair due to mums bed.
A normal xmas is already over crowded even when we dont have that to contend with , tried to politely say that and got a pretty stroppy reply saying that they dont want to be a burden and will make other plans if I dont want them there , actually I dont really , the work load will be down to me and quite frankly I am not taking it on , more their expectation of a normal xmas thoroughly annoyed me and that when i point out how poorly she is , as quite frankly they see none of it , Im given a passive aggressive response rather than any kind of understanding 

anyway none of that has any baring on my current financial situation I just needed to get it off my chest

WinterWarrior

So very sorry to read about your auntie.
Your family need to be told. How can you have a normal Christmas with your mum so poorly? I would just reply back and say yes they can all come, but everyone needs to bring a part of the lunch (cooked and ready to go) and they need to understand there’s a lack of seating and they’ll all be squeezed around the bed! 

I’m a bit confused about reporting next door to the council, are you not allowed to keep rabbits outside there? Or is it running loose? My dog used to bark if so much as a sparrow coughed so we had to keep her away from windows during working hours. She’s too old to care now. 

efes_shareholder

WinterWarrior said:

So very sorry to read about your auntie.
Your family need to be told. How can you have a normal Christmas with your mum so poorly? I would just reply back and say yes they can all come, but everyone needs to bring a part of the lunch (cooked and ready to go) and they need to understand there’s a lack of seating and they’ll all be squeezed around the bed! 

I’m a bit confused about reporting next door to the council, are you not allowed to keep rabbits outside there? Or is it running loose? My dog used to bark if so much as a sparrow coughed so we had to keep her away from windows during working hours. She’s too old to care now. 

the neices were entitled last year when covid stopped xmas and they are behaving the same now - like they want to give mum an extra special xmas , maybe to ease their conscious that they hardly ever pop in !! its too much , it will always be too much , an hour of guests any day is enough for her and I have already told my own children i cant say what is happening at xmas but if my mum is still here then they should prepare to spend the day with their dad and maybe just pop in for an hour

Re the dog , you can keep rabbits in the garden but the dog is standing at the hutch ALL day pretty much barking at the hutch and even when it goes inside with the door shut I can hear the thing barking , that said im pretty sure it was just in my front garden when i retrieved a parcel so im hoping its snuck through the fence panel they haven't fixed and wandered through our unsecured gate and escaped 
sorry but hes driven me mad all day 

WinterWarrior

Ah sorry, so it’s their dog and their rabbit? I misunderstood. Poor rabbit can’t be enjoying being barked at either ☹️