Would you leave your house to daughter only and not between son and daughter?

maman

jackyann wrote: »

I'd consider leaving the estate to both, with a life interest in the house for your daughter. Take advice about whether she can afford the upkeep of the house, and how to preserve the interest should she wish to move. You need to see a solicitor and discuss carefully, but this may get you out of your dilemma.
Agree that it needs discussing properly, and proper provision made for your grandchild(ren) denying on which of your children dies first.
But it's all doable.

Surely that's just a legal way of leaving the son out of the equation.


His sister gets to move in and live in the house for her lifetime. As he's older that might mean she outlives him.


Then after her death it passes to the grandchildren i.e. her children as the son doesn't have any.


So now he's penalised firstly because he's worked hard and bought his own home and secondly because he hasn't any children!


I'm thinking how I might feel if I was the son.

Carrot007

OK mostly nto enough information but...

Please don't reward lazyness and a life of trying to sponge of others.

I would be either giving as much as I could to the son and as little as possible to the daughter or making sure there was nothing left!

thorsoak

Wow! Aren't there a whole lot of people here who assume an awful lot about the lives of people about which we know nothing!

Could well be that the daughter who has children but no house is the sort of person who does everything for everyone else (including her mother) but never thinks about herself - and her brother could be the english drug dealing p***do. And before I go any further - NO I do not think either of these things - but we no nothing about the family dynamics and we should not be judging why the mother thinks about leaving her property in this way.

borkid

jackyann wrote: »

I'd consider leaving the estate to both, with a life interest in the house for your daughter. Take advice about whether she can afford the upkeep of the house, and how to preserve the interest should she wish to move. You need to see a solicitor and discuss carefully, but this may get you out of your dilemma.
Agree that it needs discussing properly, and proper provision made for your grandchild(ren) denying on which of your children dies first.
But it's all doable.

I'd also add that the daughter should pay rent to the brother for his half of the house, if he chooses to waive it so be it.

The original idea to my way of thinking is discriminating against people who make good life decisions and work. If the daughter was chronically ill that might be another matter.

Robisere

itsanne wrote: »

while i understand your thinking, i'd suggest the only way of doing that without the possibility of causing major hurt would be after discussing it fully with your son.

^^^^ this.

Doodles

I think it's very unfair if you didn't give them 50/50.

So what if your son is doing better in life, by not splitting equally is almost penalising him for making good choices in his life.

Your daughter is not a victim of circumstances, she has made different choices and shouldn't benefit any more than your son.

50/50 is fair. Alternatively, you could take out a life insurance policy for a sum of money fairly equal to the house. And then give the house to your daughter, and the life insurance payout to your son.

consumers_revenge

slightly aside but were you happy for a 53 year old to of been dating a girl of 23?????


I know love is blind.....but that's love in need of a guide dog!

getmore4less

If the son is not married he already has IHT issue to deal with.


Time for a chat.

Any chance the son would be interested in helping you free up equity so you can have a better life and spend some of it.

maman

thorsoak wrote: »

Wow! Aren't there a whole lot of people here who assume an awful lot about the lives of people about which we know nothing!

Could well be that the daughter who has children but no house is the sort of person who does everything for everyone else (including her mother) but never thinks about herself - and her brother could be the english drug dealing p***do. And before I go any further - NO I do not think either of these things - but we no nothing about the family dynamics and we should not be judging why the mother thinks about leaving her property in this way.

While I realise you're exaggerating to illustrate your point, I think OP painted a picture in the original post. The DD lives on her partner's state pension and part time earnings, has recently borrowed money that she doesn't expect to see again and is likely to move into the house without even telling the brother that OP has passed on. DS on the other hand has a well paid job, savings and his own home.

I'll say again that I'd go 50/50. Not because the son needs the money but because leaving him out would penalise him for doing well.

ska_lover

50/50.. I have seen what happens when family do this to each other, and - in essence, cutting someone out of a will causes immense pain and questions of why they are not worthy.

And it is almost like punishing the son for his success.

No, seriously uncool