Work Wifes and Husbands

Pollycat

Emily1968 wrote: »

Well Sunday evening came and I spoke to my husband who is back now down south. He insisted it was innocent , he eventually did show me his phone and there were no messages from the woman in question.... I feel like I'm no further on....

I'm not surprised he said he was innocent.
He'd say that if the relationship with his 'work wife' was innocent and he'd say that if the relationship wasn't innocent and he either doesn't want you to know at all or doesn't want you to know yet.

Didn't you say in one of the earlier threads that he was deleting messages between them?
I'd take the fact that there were no messages from her as more suspicious than if there were innocent messages.

74jax

Emily1968 wrote: »

Well Sunday evening came and I spoke to my husband who is back now down south. He insisted it was innocent , he eventually did show me his phone and there were no messages from the woman in question.... I feel like I'm no further on....

Did you see his call register, how long are they talking for? Did you check all messaging, so text, LinkedIn, messenger, wotsapp etc.

And there was nothing?

Worrying when he acknowledges he is on contact with her. Like how?

Emily1968

Pollycat wrote: »

I'm not surprised he said he was innocent.
He'd say that if the relationship with his 'work wife' was innocent and he'd say that if the relationship wasn't innocent and he either doesn't want you to know at all or doesn't want you to know yet.

Didn't you say in one of the earlier threads that he was deleting messages between them?
I'd take the fact that there were no messages from her as more suspicious than if there were innocent messages.

I agree even more concerned now

Emily1968

74jax wrote: »

Did you see his call register, how long are they talking for? Did you check all messaging, so text, LinkedIn, messenger, wotsapp etc.

And there was nothing?

Worrying when he acknowledges he is on contact with her. Like how?

just the texts tbh

Emily1968

What to do next is the tricky part

PeacefulWaters

Emily1968 wrote: »

What to do next is the tricky part

A blunt knife and some vinegar.

NeilCr

Emily1968 wrote: »

What to do next is the tricky part

Accept the dinner invitation.

margaretclare

What is a 'work wife'?

ska_lover

Emily you are obviously very anxious right now and tbh you seem a bit fragile

You have been married to this guy a long time so really to be asking our opinion is not going to offer you anything as you know him, very well - we don't.

You have discussed this with him and he says he is innocent so you have two choices here

Move on from it
or
Create WW3 by persisting.

No one can tell you want to do, love. we all come from very different places with very different experiences. Some of us have been cheated on, some of us haven't and personal life experiences shape our answers to questions like this

Like I said earlier, i don't like the term 'work wife' and would ask, nay , demand that he stop using that disrespectful term.

You could wind yourself up to a nervous breakdown and destroy your marriage over this - and he may well actually be telling the truth - after all you have been together a long time and hes not cheated previously, has he? (unless i have missed something)

If he IS cheating, you likely won't get the answers from him. Clues that things may be escalating are if he starts getting home very late regular, nights out with 'the lads' or spending nights away. Other than that, if hes merely chatting and texting, then unless you believe him and settle, you are going to drive yourself mental to the brink of a breakdown

plus if you keep talking about her, he may get more secretive in order to keep the friendship which may be innocent but knows its upsetting you.

Try and relax a little and do what is in your heart, but beware that accusations can end marriages and you obvs don't want that - but don't let the thoughts of strangers put you in a tizzy or cast doubt where you were feeling calm before - like I say, we don't know him

panagia

margaretclare wrote: »

What is a 'work wife'?

Some people refer to someone they work closely with every day as their work wife or husband, apparently.

(Just for info, there's recently been a spate of new usernames on here starting threads on the subject of cheating partners. I've counted three AEs so far, and put them all on ignore. If people want to continue feeding them/it that's up to them. I suppose it is quite entertaining!)