Renting to a boyfriend?

Melissa177

My pragmatic solution would be to rent the house out, and get a get a rental place with your boyfriend, incidentally.

It sounds like no-one is completely committed to their other halves on here, and yet kids are in the picture... No wonder this country is messed up if all we think about is our assets, and not the welfare of our families.

This is very true. Does that mean that the solution would be for her to move closer to me but into council/HA property (thereby reducing the available stock by 1 and spending more of your tax money on her housing benefit and increased benefits) and for me to continue to rent out the spare room to a friend until we've come to a point where we decide to get married?

Would you be happy to split your house with your girlfriend if you broke up? Or, more likely, she would get the house to raise the child in (I think that depends on if you're married).

GoToGal

jezmyers wrote: »

If you're asking how she feels about renting part of the property, she is more than happy to do so. It's less than she was paying down south, she gets to see me more often etc...

With regards to how she would feel about signing a contract giving away her rights if we were to break up. Knowing my gf she'll be fine with it and, to be honest, I doubt that her "getting a share of the property if we break up" hadn't crossed her mind any more than it had mine. This was that it hadn't until I read this thread! I'll let you all know later tonight when i've discussed it with her.

Good to know you are discussing it

Would be good to know the LEGAL position of this type of arrangement rather than the MORAL position. Because at the end of the day, we aren't the ones in the that position and we would all make our own and probably differing decisions.

jezmyers

Melissa177 wrote: »

It sounds like no-one is completely committed to their other halves on here, and yet kids are in the picture... No wonder this country is messed up if all we think about is our assets, and not the welfare of our families.

This is untrue, my girlfriend and I are totally committed to each other, especially when you take into account the time that we've been together for and apply some common sense.

If you're asking me about the welfare of my family, from a being together point of view it's better that her and the child live with me. If you're asking about the financial point of view, it's better for BOTH of us if we live apart. I guess it depends what you class welfare as.

Melissa177 wrote: »

Would you be happy to split your house with your girlfriend if you broke up? Or, more likely, she would get the house to raise the child in (I think that depends on if you're married).

I wouldn't be even slightly happy to split the house with my girlfriend if we split. Firstly, it's my house, I save up the deposit, I bought it, I decorated and improved it accordingly. Secondly, no, we'd have split up, we'd have done so for a reason.
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I'd like to once again state that i'm amazingly happy with my gf and don't doubt our relationship for a minute but this doesn't mean that I should be prepared to "risk" a percentage of my property up to the value that meant if we broke up I wouldn't be able to purchase a similar property.

jezmyers

GoToGal wrote: »

Good to know you are discussing it

Would be good to know the LEGAL position of this type of arrangement rather than the MORAL position. Because at the end of the day, we aren't the ones in the that position and we would all make our own and probably differing decisions.

totally and that's why tonight I will be discussing with her whether she is happy with me looking into the legal implications of the situation and then proceeding accordingly.

Good to see some people looking at the various situations with some common sense. After all, this is a money saving forum and I am looking to protect myself from potentially losing thousands of pounds in a worst case scenario.

jezmyers

moneysavinmonkey wrote: »

maybe his girlfriend grew up singing Independent woman by destinsy's child!

Unfortunately, I suspect this might be the case. I've only recently been starting to educate her musically and still suspect there are Westlife cd's floating around in her collection.

moneysavinmonkey

jezmyers wrote: »

Unfortunately, I suspect this might be the case. I've only recently been starting to educate her musically and still suspect there are Westlife cd's floating around in her collection.

lol!! not quite my original point but an important consideration all the same!

Melissa177

I wouldn't be even slightly happy to split the house with my girlfriend if we split. Firstly, it's my house, I save up the deposit, I bought it, I decorated and improved it accordingly. Secondly, no, we'd have split up, we'd have done so for a reason.

But when you're a family, there is no "yours" and "mine" involved, there is an "ours".

I actually think you sound like a nice guy and you'll make a nice family with your girlfriend. But my general perception of our society is that we are individualistic to the point that we think about only "me" and forget about the "we".

haggle_2

I'm keen to learn how things have worked out.

Did he move in.
Is he still in
Did he take half.

This is like a soap.

moneysavinmonkey

Melissa177 wrote: »

But when you're a family, there is no "yours" and "mine" involved, there is an "ours".
.

but then when your a family you're not supposed to split up are you!!

I'm not sure I follow the cause and effect argument... if you give all your money to someone then you won't split up but if you keep your finances more separete then that it won't work out?? i don't agree with that.

carpetbelly

I don't think there's anything wrong in being realistic about things and planning for the worst. At least when you're happy and together you can get it sorted, quickly, easily and fairly. During a breakup, if it happens, it can generally be nasty and bitter and an agreement that's already been sorted isn't a bad thing to have in place.

Just make sure anything is visited on a regular basis to see if it needs/you want it updating.

This isn't something I've actually done yet and not likely to do as I know it would break my misses heart but, I have never been a bitter person about things and like to pride myself on the fact that she has a child already and I;'d like to think I'd be fair on her and wouldnt be nasty no matter what happened.

Take pride in your own actions and take responsability for them. If you choose a partner who you think might screw you later on down the line are they right for you? Saying that, no harm in being careful either.

What a lovely catch22 scenario imo.