Prosperous soul in the making

jwil

Great to have those discussions with DD.  We can only hope they don't make the same mistakes as us!  

Good luck with the course this week.

EssexHebridean

If you struggled with the passport and it's for ID purposes then as long as your driving licence is a photo one you can use that instead. 

Beyond frustrating how little those DD's age seem to understand about personal finances isn't it - we were taught the basics about APR etc in school but not enough to really understand the subject. 

It was getting my first car that lead me into my first brush with debt, possibly unsurprisingly. Not the actual purchase of the vehicle itself - that was the princely sum of £100 - but the ongoing costs and the fact that once I had it and had passed my test it meant I went off out and about all over the place and that in itself incurred spendiness too. Then a couple of big car bills combined with the credit card company upping my credit limit repeatedly despite me not asking for it and oops - there I was with money owing that was above what I could comfortably pay back. Ouch. Parents very sensibly offered budgeting help but not financial support - I paid every penny back myself and have never got in over my head again - although have had what sadly now seems to be "the usual" OD's, loans etc until the MSE lightbulb fully came on when I joined on here. Feel free to recount my take to DD if you think it may help her see the reality a little - the amount I owed at the time was around £2k as far as I recall - not much to a lot of folk in today's money, but this was 1992 - at the time I was earning around £100 a week to give a sense of "scale". 

Drawingaline

It is a worry with how easy it is for young people to get credit. I had the interest rate and loans/mortgage discussions with my girl when she was about 13, because they were doing % in maths and she was asking when you would ever use it! It's the only maths I ever use 😂 I used to work in customer services for a credit card company and some of the calls and people's lack of understanding was hard work. She is quite bright and good with numbers so she grasped it quite quickly. 

I also funded her MacBook that she needed for college on an interest free deal, and she had to pay me £1200 over 10 months, £120 a month out of her part time wages. So she has an idea of how to pay things off and how payments can hinder spending ability (we tried to make her previous laptop last, but once she decided on her uni path a MacBook was definitely needed). She is incredibly sensible with money and I have no concerns, and am hopeful she will do ok 

All we can do is guide and advise. My oldest boy is not great with money but we have had the same conversations, and he now owes me a large amount for a gamin pc, now he is working, so will be paying me back like she did. He uses ynab, doesn't stop his impulsive spending, but he has savings and trying to get him into good habits. Which may work, may not! 

Ultimately we stay there as a sounding board, but have to let them walk their own path with finances. 

savingholmes

Thanks Jwil, EH and DAL

It's hard isn't it as we want to protect them - and they don't want to listen - and always believe they are unique in some way.... Of course we are never like that LOL. It did shock her that she might not automatically get credit - so I hope it encourages her to save - but who knows...

I am feeling absolutely exhausted so while I went into work as planned - one of my deadlines had moved - so I agreed with my boss that I could book some leave so I had part of today plus all of tomorrow off. Then I am on a course with an exam so a deep joy week. I think it is just an adrenaline crash - and the enormity of what I'm doing showing up in my body. My sleep is disrupted too - again not surprising. 

Did an LF test and was clear although I do have a slight sore throat. DS is apparently ill at sis's today and isn't coming home on time with Ex's car. He's popular as you can imagine!! DD has a bad cough - but has had for a few weeks and does LF tests twice a week and is clear. I'm hoping to have a decent lie in tomorrow.

I also need to test that whatever computer I want to use for the course works - as my main work laptop won't let me do it. I've raised a call and of course they ignored it!! So am having to use an unofficial laptop instead...

Well the finance docs for the divorce went to court today... so a watch this space moment. Likely to be 3-4 weeks.

Managed to print the conveyancing stuff - plan to post it tomorrow - or worst case Wednesday. Need to finish completing a questionnaire - but only 7 pages - and at least 2 pages of it doesn't apply to me. I need to check something on my home insurance tomorrow though and send proof I am insured for buildings for the right value. I only noticed that once I was actually at work - as it didn't go in first time I read it... I also forgot to take my ID docs with me... I'm going to see if I can email them some stuff. A friend witnessed the mortgage deed though so that's ready to send.

Getting close now...

MovingForwards

DD definitely doesn't need an £8k car for her first one. Do you think it was just because of being round people with more money and when she's away from them for a bit it might be easier to approach the subject again.
- there are plenty of loan calculators to show how much extra she would pay, interest will be quite high too.

Pampering is good, those few minutes or an hour are just for us.

Hope you get some rest tonight, your refresher goes well and there's not much more paperwork to be finalised.

Blackcats

Your conversations with your DD about money is a familiar one.  My eldest child was (and still is) terrible with money - starts off with good intentions to repay borrowing but never does.  (I'm a fine one to judge 🤣)  When the eldest got their first car insurance I paid it upfront and they had to pay me back each month from their Saturday job wages.  Towards the end of the year I said that they might be able to get insurance cheaper as they hadn't made a claim.  It was so funny to find out that they thought that car insurance was a once in a lifetime cost and they were outraged that it was an ongoing annual spend.  I realise that I'd assumed a level of understanding (and common sense) that was sadly lacking 

SandyShores

Seems to the the same story everywhere @Blackcats, my DD bought a car last year and was full of shock at the cost of the service this year.  Mind you it was £600 - because one of the brakes needed doing as well.  She also needed two new tyres.  I'm sure she turned quite pale when she realised that the service was every year as well as the MOT.  Hopefully next year won't be as expensive as this was the first service she's had done and its otherwise a well cared for car.

Savingholmes, DD was a little spendy when she first left home, but managed to rein it in and now she's much better.  I think its almost good for them to get it out of their system and realise the error of their ways early on.  Unlike me who didn't learn the lesson until very late in the day

savingholmes

Thanks MF, Blackcats and Sandy and others for sharing your stories. Hopefully I can get the message through to DD.

I've spent much of this evening reading MFW diaries - as within a few months I am hoping to swap boards from DFW to MFW. As a matter of principle - I want to try and OP something - even if it is as small as 1% of the monthly payment as a start and build up. I think though that I am likely to follow MF and ES advice - and:

a) Get Xmas out the way
b) Put money into EF so less of a worry if lost job (low risk job and would qualify for a lot of redundancy pay - that I could make last a year)
c) Potentially pay token amount to mortgage
d) Pay most into pension so I get 25% top up from the government. I could potentially access the lump sum on 4.5 years if I wanted so could work well.

I'm currently debt neutral thanks to a gift earlier in the month from my sister but am leaving the money in my account for now - in case of unexpected bills and as a kind of EF. The 0% doesn't run out until some time in March 2022 - so I don't need to repay yet.

I think my conveyancing bill - over and above the 'free' bit - could be £300-500 so need to be careful - especially as I need £1K of my own money to pay off Ex.

My car is in for it's MOT tomorrow - so hoping that it passes without needing any work.

hugglemonster

All sounding busy but heading in the right direction, I remember getting my first car for £1000 that was a lot of money and of course that was the start of borrowing money instead of saving.

Hope to join you on the MFW board next year, I still want to send over little bits and pieces despite my other outgoings!

Fingers crossed for the MOT today.

H x

savingholmes

Thanks HM

Well I spoke to conveyancing solicitor's rep

• It looks like it will cost me around £360 to do the equity transfer. 
• I can send ID docs electronically so that's something.
• I've checked my buildings insurance and they are unlimited - so that should be fine with mortgage company.
• So I'm about ready to bundle my mortgage stuff into the post... 
• They think they can hit my divorce target date - as long as I get finance consent order in time and I send my paperwork off now.

Scary and exciting all at once. Glad I had today off as I am still shattered!

In worse news - my solicitor has sent her bill and upped her estimate for finishing by £414. Ouch.... I was tempted to ask for a breakdown of what that would cover but that would cost me about £50 extra. It just is what it is at this point. Nearly over...

So today:
1) Get dressed 
2) Post mortgage stuff
3) Take DS to train station
4) Take car for MOT
5) Try to relax while spending as little as possible!!