help re baby sleep (merged)

Miss_Cinnabon

my boy is the same, put him down about 6 and he wakes up all the time, am getting no sleep, today has been really bad, been in tears as i am so shattered.

He still has a bottle of water at night but tonight i am dropping that so will see how it goes:rolleyes:

he is nearly 3 so need to get him sorted out, my other son was the same he didnt sleep through til he was 5:eek:

controlled crying waste of time, not even going to bother with that

susie

HappySad

How can i get my baby 10 months to sleep & settle in his own cot.

I am currently t rying to just leave him for 15mins to let him cry to sleep but he just cries and cries. I was under the impression that if you leave him long enough he would eventually settle asleep and then from then on sleep in the cot and settle on his own. How long is too long to leave him crying?

What have you dont in the past to get baby settled.

skylight

Crumbs. I have had 2 babies who slept straight away, one needed (needs) a dummy and one who at 2yo (as I left it too late) would slam her head against the wall/floor and upturn her bed. I would advise not letting it get to this stage!

At 10mths he has already developed bad habits (!) as you can see. I would advocate just leaving him and letting him cry. Perhaps return every 15 mins to calm him and re-settle him. But no removing him or giving in - all he will learn is that if he cries loudly enough Mum will take him away again! And its going to take days (some books suggest up to 2 weeks!)

Have you thought about sending him to bed with a warm bottle? Its not really a good idea to replace one bad habit with another, so quickly start reducing the amount in the bottle each night. Does he have a dummy? Perhaps one for nighttime use only - but DD4 had a dummy and it was a real !!!!!! getting up in the night occasionally when she wanted it! But now she is a year old I have started to wean her off it (nothing during the day regardless of how loud the screams get and she is not allowed to go to bed with it - rarely now she wants it in the morning or early morning and this will be stopping soon). Maybe baby just wants something to soothe him?

Its difficult - you need the space too, but he is still only a baby. But best of luck!

shelley_crow

leaving him to cry is controlled crying (google it)

I had trouble with ds who would only go to sleep if he was held up to 15 months old, if we put him down he woke up. He was getting heavy so we had to do controlled crying to get him to settle alone. It's difficult but stick it out and you'll get results.

Another tactic is for you to sleep with a teddy for a few days. The teddy will get your smell, put it in with bubba when he goes to sleep and he'll have something comforting that smells of mommy x

inkie

Controlled trying technique - but built it up, rather than go for the 15 min straight away. You need to persevere with it though, otherwise it will not work. Is this a new problem - or are you only just starting to get him to sleep in his cot?

HappySad

Thanks everyone. I am only just trying to get him to sleep in the cot. As soon as he sees that he is in the cot he just cries & cries. I know that this is my fault as I started the habit of him sleeping with us I should have allowed some time where he sleeps in his cot.

I have tried letting him cry so far for 15mins & when I returned he was standing in the cot. I will try the teddy bear.

Shelley-crow - how long did it take you to get DS to sleep on his own with controlled crying.

I have found this on controlled crying http://www.askbaby.com/Baby-sleep-training.htm

daphne_descends

Please don't leave your baby to cry. CC only works because the babies learn that when they cry, no one comes - not a nice thing to teach IMO.

What about a gentle approach - the No Cry Sleep Solution is based on getting your baby to sleep without the harsher techniques like controlled crying, and making your baby feel comforted and safe so they are happy to fall asleep on their own.

fsdss

HappySad wrote: »

Thanks everyone. I am only just trying to get him to sleep in the cot. As soon as he sees that he is in the cot he just cries & cries. I know that this is my fault as I started the habit of him sleeping with us I should have allowed some time where he sleeps in his cot.

and that what has happened - he has developed a habit.

you are doing great - just keep putting him down like you are doing and it will eventually work.

Rachie_B

i am not a fan of leaving to cry

what about the kinder rapid return ,whereby you leave him,but keep returning to resettle him so he knows you are there

or gradual withdrawal:whereby you sit next to the cot while he settles,( maybe even stroking him,holding his hand through the bars)then each night getting further and further away until you are outside the door and he doesnt need you to settle anymore ( can take a few weeks)

he has co slept for 10 months and he has to learn this new procedure of settling himself to sleep,and needs your help it will not be easy ( for either of you!) and wont happen overnight

leaving him a new situation / surroundings to cry is not nice IMO

leaving him to cry for 2 mins then returning......leaving again and returning in 3 mins...... etc is far kinder

good luck
x

leoetal19

i can only speak from my own experience-my eldest ds (now 22) got to 10 months and had NEVER slept for more than 2 hours at a stretch-day or night-and as i was breastfeeding him (no bottles/expressing etc) neither did I !!
i was sooo tired.
he was my first born so i was ever so soft with him i have to add
my health visitor advised me- put him in his cot and let him cry-it took 2 nights-with him stood screaming for ages on and off the first night, a bit less the second-than he slept through there-after!! i was amazed-2 awful long nights followed by heavenly sleep
no lasting damage-breast fed him til he was 2, grew into a dream son, healthy, happy and well balanced x i was more sensible with younger 2 so it never got this bad!!
good luck xxx