Can you make someone else lose weight?

Anoneemoose

motorguy wrote: »

I totally agree. I think thats the way it will go with obesity.

I listened to her one morning when she came in after being to the doctors. There wasnt one ailment she had that wouldnt be significantly improved if she lost weight.

• "Well my knee joints are still giving me problems"
• "I've still pains in my hips"
• "Hes given me new pain killers for my back"
• "My asthma medication has been increased"
• "My diabetes still gives me issues"
• "My blood pressure is still high so hes increased my medication"

I would disagree. Society has always frowned on the obese and that has doing nothing to make them less obese. There is no 'cure' for obesity. Dieting doesn't work long term. Eating well and exercising without the focus on weight will bring about improvements in health and possibly weight loss will happen too.

There are so many misconceptions about being fat, it's unreal. And why shouldn't obese people be treated on the NHS? I assume everyone pays taxes? And what about mental health? The 'shame' of living in a society where fat is evil often causes problems. I had an eating disorder caused by 2 decades of dieting. I asked the NHS for help and got none. I ended up paying privately for therapy and am much recovered. I am obese. I cannot 'diet' in case my bulimia is triggered. I cannot exercise due to illness (not caused by obesity).

You do not know by looking at someone what their story is. To assume that because someone's BMI is higher than normal they are lazy gluttons is absurd. Just as by assuming that by looking at a thin person they are healthy is absurd.

Weight does not equal health. Our appearance (as in size) tells us nothing about our health. And to make appearance the marker of health or lack thereof is harmful. Health is a direction and a potential not a destination. There is no single point called health that we will all reach and stay on. And there is no moral imperative that anyone is obliged to even be healthy, whatever that is deemed to be. The bigger issue is what obstacles prevent people from achieving the kind of health they want? This includes poverty, education, access, discrimination etc.

As Marilyn Wann famously says in her weight diversity talks, “The only thing anyone can accurately diagnose when looking at a fat person is their own level of weight prejudice.”

Pollycat

Anoneemoose wrote: »

Please don't be sucked into the Slimming World hype either. It touts itself as a healthy lifestyle but it was the cause of many problems, including bulimia for me. And lots of others too. It is essentially a low fat, calorie controlled diet and we now know low fat isn't good for you.
People believe that because you're 'allowed to eat' fruit and veg and cook from scratch that it's healthy, but don't forget you can cook from scratch and eat fruit and veg regardless. And SW also heavily push processed rubbish too. You have to count whole foods like avocado and nuts as syns, yet you can eat 15 full of nasties mullerlights if you wanted because they're 'free'.

Taking the focus off his weight will help. Just concentrate on trying to encourage a well balanced, mainly unprocessed diet. Try also to find things he might like to do exercise wise, without it being because of his weight. Could you go for walks together for example? Exercise is a celebration of what our bodies can do, not a punishment for what we eat.

Engaging in healthy behaviours like a well balanced diet and movement, as well as enjoying himself, so as to reduce stress, will bring about positive changes regardless of whether he loses weight.

I believe you've posted before about your opinions of Slimming World.
It works for a lot of people.

Anoneemoose

Pollycat wrote: »

I believe you've posted before about your opinions of Slimming World.
It works for a lot of people.

I have. And it doesn't. Not long term. Not for the majority.

isplumm

svain wrote: »

Forget diets, slimming world etc .... they are all temporary and who in their right mind wants to spend rest of life counting calories, reading labels etc. There is zero long term motivation in that! .... The exception to this rule is managing snacking between meals. Keep this stuff out of the house and cook an extra meal if necessary to combat this

The key is burn more than you eat. Its a simple equation .... so get a dog or join a walking club, take up a sport or hobby that gets him active.

Have you actually tried SW - definitely no calorie counting ... it is a lifestyle change .... seems to work for a lot of people.

Mark

Anoneemoose

isplumm wrote: »

Have you actually tried SW - definitely no calorie counting ... it is a lifestyle change .... seems to work for a lot of people.

Mark

No calorie counting but calorie controlled. Lifestyle change is just another way of saying diet. You can make lifestyle changes without counting syns/points/calories/carbs etc.

isplumm

Anoneemoose wrote: »

I have. And it doesn't. Not long term. Not for the majority.

I don't agree - it works for a lot of people - i am at point where I am a few lbs off target - that will be the difficult bit - but there are lots of target members who come to group every few weeks - so it is possible.

Mark

Anoneemoose

isplumm wrote: »

I don't agree - it works for a lot of people - i am at point where I am a few lbs off target - that will be the difficult bit - but there are lots of target members who come to group every few weeks - so it is possible.

Mark

And forl each of those target members, there will be many more who didn't get to target or who got to target and then regained. Like the Woman of the Year who was on that Channel 4 documentary.

Many will believe in SW. I did once upon a time too, so I understand why it seems attractive. And it worked for me, many times. Until I became obsessed with syns and thinking if I happened to eat a wholesome full fat yogurt with nuts and honey that I would be 'bad' because it wasn't a processed mullerlight that was 'free'.

Losing weight is relatively easy, keeping it off is the difficult bit. And as I said, there are plenty of studies that show between 80/95% of people who diet, WILL regain the weight. It doesn't matter whether that's SW, WW or any of the other diet plans out there. And of those 80/95%, 2/3 will regain even more weight.

jayII

Anoneemoose wrote: »

And forl each of those target members, there will be many more who didn't get to target or who got to target and then regained. Like the Woman of the Year who was on that Channel 4 documentary.

Many will believe in SW. I did once upon a time too, so I understand why it seems attractive. And it worked for me, many times. Until I became obsessed with syns and thinking if I happened to eat a wholesome full fat yogurt with nuts and honey that I would be 'bad' because it wasn't a processed mullerlight that was 'free'.

Losing weight is relatively easy, keeping it off is the difficult bit. And as I said, there are plenty of studies that show between 80/95% of people who diet, WILL regain the weight. It doesn't matter whether that's SW, WW or any of the other diet plans out there. And of those 80/95%, 2/3 will regain even more weight.

With respect, that is your personal take on it. I think the term 'syns' is ridiculous, so I choose not to use it--if counting up, I just use the numbers or use the word 'things'. I also agree with you on Muller light yogurts and other heavily processed 'free' foods. I choose to eat fat free natural yogurt, healthy quark (it's been around since forever in Northern Europe and I love the stuff) and other unprocessed 'free' foods.

However, apart from 'syns' and processed foods, I think SW is a pretty healthy diet--most lean meats are unlimited or 'free', as is oily fish and many other 'non low-fat' but healthy foods. Nuts should indeed be restricted as they are very high fat and are best for us in small quantities. SW also encourages you to eat a small amount of 'syns' such as nuts, a small amount of chocolate or other high calorie 'treat' foods each day--for me that's helping me to learn to enjoy these foods in moderate amounts, in a guilt free way--something I'd struggled to do for some years.

I don't stick to SW every day--I probably average 5-6 SW days each week, but that is a manageable pattern for me and I'm losing weight gradually and effortlessly, so I'm very happy with this easy 'lifestyle change'.

Tabbytabitha

motorguy wrote: »

Laxatives??? :rotfl:

Reported as SPAM

Not a good idea to quote Spam as the post is removed but the Spam lives on in your quote.

dandy-candy

Gosh so many replies! Thank you.

DH went to a SW about 8 years ago but he didn't think it was a very good one as the 2 ladies running it were enormous and said you can drink as much diet soda a day as you want because it's calorie free, which he didn't think was very healthy advice. I've looked up on the SW site and found a different one and suggested he tries it, he said he will go if I come too which I'm fine with.

He also said he would start the diet again on Monday which I was really amazed and pleased about as I had assumed he would say "after Christmas". He doesn't have much of a sweet tooth but he loves fats - mayonnaise, cheese, creamy sauces, ice cream, slabs of butter etc. We have been eating rather a lot of ready meals lately so I'm going to completely stop getting those.