The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

pollyanna_26

You used to watch " Bread " too Monna . I haven't heard that name in years , first laugh of the day .
You are right , his lordship is swanning round and an interim measure needs to be put in place as soon as possible .
Hope today goes well burtha. I completely mucked up the contact details for Young Minds yesterday , everything is correct but helpline times are 9.30-4pm Mon to Fri . Calls are free from landline or mobile and you can also email . Could be worth doing . They have information on there on many things including what to say and do to get the help your daughter needs . Hope the headache has eased . Take care x
Gintot enjoy your holiday .
polly

pollyanna_26

Missed your post FPk .Very good news for FIL , a relief for all I imagine . Wishing him many more dancing years .
polly

[Deleted User]

Just a thought to keep you buoyant BERTHA is that having done this to you and the family, after this 'initial euphoria' in a new relationship will ultimately come reality, warts, claws and all in his 'new' relationship and the earth will rise up to hit him with a humungous thump and realisation will dawn that this is not 'Shangri La' and the wonderful new beginning that it currently seems. That is when it gets interesting because that is likely the time when he does to her just what he's done to you and walks away without a backward look or thought to pastures new in the Elysian Fields.....and again and again and again in an increasingly desperate inward spiral until he's an old and sad man....... Hold that head up Girlie, yours is the moral 'high ground' and always will be xxx.

Islandmaid

MrsLW brill

Who said, when a man marries his mistress, he creates a vacancy....

I know they are not getting married, but there is definitely truth in it, the only people I know who have had affairs (male and female) have done so more than once - thrill of the chase I guess. They forget the comfort of monogamy and family.

monnagran

Pollyanna, one of my all time favourite programmes. I can hear Ma Boswell now, "That Lolo Lil. She's a t*rt!"

Burtha, FairyP touched ever so gently on something that I've been feeling but not dared to say.
It most be very difficult to tell how much of your DDs trouble is real mental trauma and how much is normal teenage angst and desire not to have to do anything hard or demanding.
I'm not belittling her anguish one bit, but sometimes one just has to grit one's teeth and get on with it and its never too early to learn that.
Mothers are people too and they can't give in. One day she may be a mother and have to keep her children safe and protected no matter how bad she is feeling herself.
She is very young but your DS is not an adult and he needs attention too.

Dear burtha, please look after you as well as every one else.

pollyanna_26

Monna I could hear Ma Boswell too , hence the laugh .
Lyn There is a very toxic ex formerly in our lives , now alone and barely mobile after a lifetime of alcohol and often drug abuse . Do I care? no I don't , was always right and we were wrong . i did try to direct him towards support a few years ago and got a mouthful of vile abuse in reply , so nothing changed there . The Mills of God indeed .

I think it's a difficult thing concerning youngsters who are struggling . All I can do is post from my experience with youngest . I don't know if burthas daughter has had a proper assessment when she was struggling at school . it could be an adolescent thing and all will be well . However my daughter after wrong diagnosis was found to have a life changing mh disorder .
It is always worth seeking advice , hopefully all will be well and maybe a little counselling will provide the tools to deal with the school issues .
The reason I'm offering advice is this issue hasn't appeared since her father left but was already a problem .
From my experience as a mother you can't really look after yourself is you are worried sick about a loved one .
I'm not having a go at anyone here who are trying to help and comfort burtha, all our life experiences differ but I heard friends say " she needs a good smack " " she needs to grow up and get on with it " etc . It made me question my own gut instinct that something really wrong . I had three older offspring and knew things weren't right . In the end I fought for many years for the correct help and will the correct medication her life is different . I don't believe and neither do the Doctors that she would be alive now if it hadn't been pursued .
That is an extreme but if burtha can get peace of mind she will be in a better place to look after herself and sort things out going forward .
Sorry for the rambling post and no offence meant . If needed I'll get me coat
polly

FairyPrincessk

Don't get your coat Polly! I think your advice about where and how to seek help is brilliant. I also don't really disagree with you--I think it is great that Burtha is pushing to get her DD some help. All I'm saying is that sometimes we're tempted to do the equivalent of calling an ambulance for a scraped knee and instead of helping it actually just scares everyone more. Of course what Burtha and her DD are dealing with is much bigger than a scraped knee and there are other factors at play, but sometimes it helps to have an outside perspective. I'm not even sure if that is what Burtha is doing, just wanted to offer her the perspective in case it helps.

pollyanna_26

No problem FPk although I did wonder if I'd killed the thread!
I've popped in with a heads up for Fuds . We've just had the Flu vaccine and if needed Pneumococcal vaccine letter from the surgery . So if you aren't on it yet now's the time . If necessary be the squeaky wheel that gets the oil!
polly

Hard_Up_Hester

My ex celebrated his 'new life's by buying g a boat, unfortunately he peed off all the other club members so much his boat kept getting untied, eventually during a big storm it got smashed to smithereens!
So he tried fancy holidays abroad and chose Sharm else Sheik. The hotel he was in was bombed, he wasn't injured but his holiday was severely bu&&erd.
There were other things but these were the ones that made me laugh the most!

Floss

My ex took himself and his current wife off to Cuba to get married (of course he didn't take the 2 boys )... I thought it was hilarious that because he is a tight-a*se, he went in hurricane season :rotfl: