The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

pollyanna_26

Nargleblast said:

Yes, that was me. I believe there are a finite number of chemical elements and compounds in the universe, so everything living or not is a combination of the same chemicals. We contain carbon - so do coal and trees. We contain metals like calcium, phosphorus, magnesium - so do rocks. We are indeed the stuff that stars are made of, and when we die, our bodies go back to nature and the living part (self, being, soul, identity, whatever you call it), which is a form of energy,  joins with all the other energy in the universe. When we die we go back to the stars.

I knew it was right for my husband to die in the way he did (cardiac arrest in his sleep) when I discovered his cancer had started to spread to his brain. Our Fencer friend LameWolf told me at the time that she could imagine the Gentleman with the Cloak and Scythe (Death from Discworld) putting a comforting arm around my husband and saying "Time to go now, friend, it will only get unpleasant if you wait."  (Cheers, Wolfie xxxxx)

I still find your belief of going back to the stars very comforting and likely to be so for others.. If I remember correctly you were visiting your husband then realised he'd already gone back to the stars. I found that quite a wonderful thing not many of us get to see the moment of peace after painful struggles.

I miss " The Man in the Hat" still. Although Death was a very tall figure Terry did away with the concept of fear. Death could be silly,  became interested in cats etc. Millions around the world must have pictured him taking Terry by the hand when the news broke.

Someone in America wrote a wonderful poem " The Sun Goes Down Upon The Ankh" For years I planned to cross stitch it and frame it for my youngest daughter. She went through tough years when young and the fact I'd preordered the next book each time I knew of it had kept her going. I really worried when he died. She'd lost a young friend to suicide at the same time.

She told me she was living because Terry would want her to. Each year we wear the Lilac and she reads every book again. I doubt Sir Terry will ever be forgotten.

I'm very happy to see Wolfie back posting more reguarly she's been missed by many. I used to check the Flylady thread to see if she'd posted there and all was well.

pollyx

LameWolf

@pollyanna_26 I'd feel a bit of a fraud posting on Flylady currently, as I'm not able to do much of the housework by myself at all; thankfully the Estimable Mr Wolf goes into his Jeeves mode and helps me keep on top of it.

I'm keeping busy though; getting a few more dog bookings now, I have a cross stitch portrait of an English Springer Spaniel (one of my regulars) that I'm part way through, and I've been doing several online courses to do with dog care. What I'd like is to get my hands and wrists back well enough to knit again, as I have a partly-done cardigan that I'd like to finish. Unfortunately, it's blackberry stitch, and my hands are simply not strong enough at present.

Mr Wolf likes me to read some of Sir Terry's work to him last thing at night. We used to take it in turns, but my increased deafness, and his increasingly quiet voice (thanks, Parkinson's!) means it's best if I do all the reading out loud. We're currently re-reading "Sourcery".

MingVase

Well I am UPSET. That PollyParrot keeps casting aspidistras at me and now monna is picking on me and I'm just a poor wee misunderstood Vase. I must defend myself!!

I didn't keep Peter Ginn imprisoned in the shed for years - he was a on a working holiday for one summer! He is an archeologist and archeologists like digging and I was kind enough to let him dig my garden plus supplied his board and keep. Three square meals a day (ok, all of porridge but they were square) & my lovely shed to live in complete with en suite loo (well compost bin)

I did not entice any pachyderms into my freezer - it was a very hot day and that animal was obv not used to the heat of summer in the Scottish hills, and felt the need to cool down, saw the freezer door open, and walked in. No thought at all for my electricity bill! Then I mistakenly and unknowingly leaned on the freezer door.. that's all.

I demand a fair hearing!

JUSTICE FOR THE MING!

I SHALL NOT BE MOVED!

FREE THE VASE!

monnagran

Sigh..........

Do not attend the pity party that a certain vase is throwing, just throw the vase.
I have heard some lame justifications in my time, but that one takes the proverbial custard cream.

On a more serious note, and in place of a TFT, I will repeat my piece on grief.  It may help SS, and as for replying to insensitive comments, a weak smile and "Oh. Is that what you think?" may shut the perpetrators up.

Grief.

We think that grief fills our life for a while, like a circle coloured in, and as time goes on other things come into our lives and the coloured circle of grief grows smaller as the other things crowd it out.
In fact it is not like that at all.
The coloured circle of grief does not grow smaller at all.
What happens is, that eventually we step outside the circle of our grief a little way, do something else and make a slightly bigger circle that we do begin to fill with other things.
The more 'other things' we do, the bigger that circle gets, but the circle of our grief is still there, the same size and just as painful.
We can visit it when we want to, but when we have had enough we can step outside again into our larger life, leaving our grief circle until we need to visit it again.
At some point the colour of the grief circle begins to fade and the comfort of happy memories will remain.


I don't know where I found this, but it seems to make sense.
It certainly demolishes the idea of ever 'getting over it'.

VJsmum

Thanks for that, monna - it certainly resonates with my own experience after losing mum and dad.  Also, i don't really want to 'get over it'. 

Cast is coming off today - remains to be seen whether another one will replace it

newroadahead

Ladies again you have hit nails on head
I lost my " real" as in biological mum when I was young I had an older Dsis ( who I lost last year) 
When I was younger I could remember mum things like her going into a diabetic coma and going to live with my auntie for over 18 months and mum coming for the day for my 8th birthday
My auntie made 2 chocolate sponges in the shape of 8  I was so happy 
I remember we moved and were closer to mums family and Ddad was still.in the forces
I didn't know until a few years ago that Dad was told mum had cancer and less than a year about a few months before she passed and he didn't tell anyone 
Dmum passing affected me for many years even now sometimes
Dad married twice more and again nursed 2 wives until they passed
He has been quite poorly in the past 3 or 4 years and I have talked to him a lot about his wives and earlier this year he gave me the last of  the family photos he had 
I think I took after mum as I don't like having my photo taken
A number of years ago Ddad gave me a box full of slides about 250 after going through them all I found 5 photos of mum looking at the camera which I had  converted to photos
It made me decide however much I hate my photo I need to smile in photos with DGC to make memories
I want as much as possible my DGC to have good memories of nana and grandad
Talking of which DGC arrive for a week on Sunday need to sort the house tomorrow 
Sorry don't know what it is about this thread makes me want reminisce or waffle 

NRA x

pollyanna_26

newroadahead said:

Ladies again you have hit nails on head
I lost my " real" as in biological mum when I was young I had an older Dsis ( who I lost last year) 
When I was younger I could remember mum things like her going into a diabetic coma and going to live with my auntie for over 18 months and mum coming for the day for my 8th birthday
My auntie made 2 chocolate sponges in the shape of 8  I was so happy 
I remember we moved and were closer to mums family and Ddad was still.in the forces
I didn't know until a few years ago that Dad was told mum had cancer and less than a year about a few months before she passed and he didn't tell anyone 
Dmum passing affected me for many years even now sometimes
Dad married twice more and again nursed 2 wives until they passed
He has been quite poorly in the past 3 or 4 years and I have talked to him a lot about his wives and earlier this year he gave me the last of  the family photos he had 
I think I took after mum as I don't like having my photo taken
A number of years ago Ddad gave me a box full of slides about 250 after going through them all I found 5 photos of mum looking at the camera which I had  converted to photos
It made me decide however much I hate my photo I need to smile in photos with DGC to make memories
I want as much as possible my DGC to have good memories of nana and grandad
Talking of which DGC arrive for a week on Sunday need to sort the house tomorrow 
Sorry don't know what it is about this thread makes me want reminisce or waffle 

NRA x

There aren't any rules on this thread NRA, well apart from K.....G. Oh and I noticed our beloved sainted monna said Bum! However she was driven to distraction by she , it or whatever is stalking the thread . Perhaps Mar has been taken hostage by an elephant out to ruin her reputation. I've seen some you wouldn't fancy getting on the wrong side of in Edinburgh Zoo. Their Giraffes seem very tall but I've known nice sunny days in Scotland but never a day that would force an Elephant to seek refuge in a domestic freezer.

I've been doing my journey down memory lane too and it can put a lot of things in perspective. I never liked having my photo taken but they're there going back through the years

Smile with the GC and make the memories. Talk. as much as you like. Like burtha I was trying to describe the Fence I came up with friendly, funny, caring and yes bonkers.

pollyx

 

monnagran

Morning fencers.

Personally, I think that 'bum' is a completely respectable word.  I can think of worse.

Speaking of worse Polly, I have come to the conclusion that Mar has disappeared and the menacing Ming Vase is actually Nursie in heavy disguise.  After all, she has been very quiet for a long time, and we all know how quiet Nursie can be when she is plotting havoc. I seem to remember that she was last heard of in Australia, but since then seems to have dropped out of sight.  GreyQueen has had her cupboard padlocked, but when did a padlock ever keep Nursie away from trouble.

No, the more I think of it, the more certain I am that Ming has been taken over by the evil force that is Nursie.  Perhaps our Mar is locked in GQ's cupboard, keeping Henti De Vac company.

For newer members of the fencers army, who may be wondering who Nursie is, she is beyond description, but if she has reappeared be afraid.  Be VERY afraid.

Before you decide that I have lost the plot and start sending for men in white coats, I'll  go to my trusty exercise books and see if I can find a sober and sensible TFT.

Ah yes.  My oldest and favouritest.

THOUGHT FOR TODAY 

An apple a day will keep ANYONE away if thrown hard enough.

boultdj

Henry de Vac will not like to share space again if Nurse is back!
Please tell us GQ if she's back.

MingVase

I'd like to see anybody try to take me over. I really would enjoy that.