Visitors when you've just had a baby

jjj1980

I would just be straight with them, tell them them they will get a call once baby has arrived and photos by the email/text but no visits will happen until YOU invite them. I wouldn't even let them know you are in labour.

bspm

I think a lot of the trouble nowadays is that us older people (whose husbands did not have paternity leave) needed help from our parents when we had our children. We also did not have the opportunity to have up to nine months maternity leave. I guess what I am trying to say is a lot of visiting had to be done early on.

My daughter in law has just had her second baby in 20 months, there have been issues with her mom visiting from California, it has caused stress as her mom had to book the flight around a 'possible' birth date, far too expensive to book a flight with two weeks notice from California to UK. The baby was due on the 1st February and luckily was born that day, grandma had booked her flight for the 15th February so all went well. It didn't go so well with the first one but hey ho, they all survived!

Speaking as a grandmother I would never encroach on any of our children's wishes but have been fortunate in the way we have all dealt with new babies arriving.

Not sure what to tell you, you seem to be having problems now when all you should be doing is resting and preparing mentally for your new arrival, but having read all this thread I think your best option is to do what you have decided, which is to advise them that they can come visit but that they will have to stay in a hotel or similar, if they really want to see the baby so much, rather than it sounding like one-upmanship from your mom, then they will abide by your wishes, if they don't ? that is your decision on how you wish to proceed.

Good luck with everything.
xx