Am I being over sensitive

justme111

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Pornography though is putting forward an idealised and not obtainable view of sex.
Then they would need to discuss it between them.

Excuse me ? What do you mean "idealised and not obtainable"? You mean one could not have sex with a particular actress? So what is wrong with that? People watch football and beauty contests although they can not play at the same level or be the same good looking, what is wrong with that?

Proxima_Centauri

Suggest you both watch some together?

Torry_Quine

justme111 wrote: »

Not people. Pictures on the screen. By your logic soaps are about how one is involved in other's relationships - why do you think it is right to see couple argue but not have sexon screen? Because you take as an offence whenever any sexual thoughts are in your man's head if they are not related to you? What is next then - ban on fantasies during masturbation? Ban on masturbation?- as if he achieves sexyal satisfaction without her that must be unacceptable . Or is it acceptable? If so - what is a difference between watching !!!!!! and masturbating?

There's a difference between showing a couple having sex as part of their relationship and pornography which is in isolation from relationship.

I do think that if you are in are in a relationship you shouldn't be having sexual thoughts and feelings about anyone else.

However these are my views and this thread is not meant to be about me so I'll bow out now as I know how it will go

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

I don't think it's an issue, as long as it's a adult human female and not appearing to be abused/treated violently. You've described it as 'housewifey'. So just a normal woman, nothing particularly dodgy or unrealistic about it.


He was probably right to stay out of your way for that night - it gives you a chance to get over the initial shock and think about what you want to say, calmly and reasonably.

I'm not ignoring your upset, but, to me, I'd give an analogy that I look at pictures of amazing looking food, think about what they would be like to experience, what the lifestyle would be like for a person who eats only Vegan/Fruitarian/has chocolate - it doesn't mean I'm going to add the ingredients onto my Ocado account and spend the next fortnight cooking for hours, spending a fortune and stuffing my face. I'm just looking at pictures that are attractive/interesting to me.

I'll still end up eating whatever the OH has cooked for tea. If I'm lucky, it'll be a nice meal rather than burnt offerings and, whatever he presents to me, he won't be upset that I have looked at pictures of non carbonised food.


(And yes, if he looks at pornography when I'm not at home - I think most people expected the word to be swearfiltered - as long as it's not abusive or potentially illegal, I don't particularly care.)

Guest101

I have found in some cases people who feel negatively about !!!!!! are often insecure about themselves. Which is quite unnattractive

justme111

[QUOTE=Torry

I do think that if you are in are in a relationship you shouldn't be having sexual thoughts and feelings about anyone else.

However these are my views and this thread is not meant to be about me so I'll bow out now as I know how it will go[/QUOTE]
What if thoughts are not about a person but situation/objects/feelings? Is that ok? Watching !!!!!! dare I say is not about "person", is about series of images, objects - body parts, actions, facial expressions, sounds etc. So are objects/situations ok for fantasies?

Person_one

Guest101 wrote: »

I have found in some cases people who feel negatively about !!!!!! are often insecure about themselves. Which is quite unnattractive

What an unpleasant and pointless thing to say.

Guest101

Person_one wrote: »

What an unpleasant and pointless thing to say.

Huh? In what way??

svain

Person_one wrote: »

What an unpleasant and pointless thing to say.

I would of said it was a fair comment

Person_one

Guest101 wrote: »

Huh? In what way??

The OP is upset that her partner has been looking at other women and getting sexual gratification from that. Whatever you or I might think about !!!!!! (I'm guessing you think its great and watch a lot) that's not an unusual response, especially for a woman of a generation that didn't grow up with the knowledge that most of their male peers were at least slightly addicted to instantly available free !!!!!!.

How does you telling her that she's insecure and unattractive (to you) help her with her current situation?