Other thread opened my eyes

Pollycat

spirit wrote: »

She would go to her club and make out she was a sweet old lady and how Mrs so and so said what a lovely person she was.

This ^^^^ is my friend's Mum.
Everyone who meets her thinks she's lovely.

They don't know what a !!!!! she is to the people closest to her.

spirit

Pollycat wrote: »

This ^^^^ is my friend's Mum.
Everyone who meets her thinks she's lovely.

They don't know what a !!!!! she is to the people closest to her.

Are you my sister LOL

Pollycat

spirit wrote: »

Are you my sister LOL

No. But my friend might be.

mrsmac10

Morning

Just popped by to say hello and I have am now up to date

Take care and hope you all have a nice day

maryb

Do those of you with narcissistic parents find that years later, you are still irrationally terrified of people being angry with you?

Shropshirelass

Yes Maryb, and beginning to understand why...
I'm another with toxic family, now both parents are gone, and I've dropped contact with my brother, I can see all kinds of patterns.

It seems I looked for a partner who was as controlling as my Dad. Dad copied his father's behaviour, more so as he got older, and after Grandad died, Dad seemed to fill his place. When Dad got old, and less 'with it' brother attempted to take over.

Having eventually got away from my ex, and settled with a lovely, emotionally mature man, I wasn't having any nonsense from brother, so only way I could cope was a complete break with him. Very sad that includes his lovely children.

I don't want to waste my time with him now, arguing and competing are not enjoyable to me, I love a quiet life, don't even want to analyse him or his wife, who will certainly give him an 'interesting' time.

My best wishes for strength of decision making to those involved with toxic family members, of whatever type. This conversation struck a note with me, I have certainly found it helpful to know others have had similar experience.

spirit

maryb wrote: »

Do those of you with narcissistic parents find that years later, you are still irrationally terrified of people being angry with you?

No I'm not.

LameWolf

maryb wrote: »

Do those of you with narcissistic parents find that years later, you are still irrationally terrified of people being angry with you?

Yes. I don't do confrontation at all; even someone being unpleasant to me online will actually make me physically ill. Hence I don't have a FB account, or any of that sort of malarkey.
I remained terrified of my father even after I'd been told he'd died.

lessonlearned

Saw my fathers solicitor today. I have never been so embarassed in all my life.

He was asking about my sister, what her intentions were. I had to blink back the tears as I tried to answer him. I could see he was plainly shocked.

I guess they must come across this kind of scenario quite regularly because he told me there is a formula they use to try and establish fairness.

He came up with a figure that he thinks she should relinquish to me in order to ensure a fair and equitable division of the estate.

I cannot see her accepting that figure. As soon as he said the amount he had in mind I envisaged yet another hissy fit and that the accusations will be flying again in an email bombardment.

Well I'm not going to rise......it's up to her, on her conscience. I am not going to be drawn into any further discussion. It's between her and the solicitor now.

He is seeing her tomorrow......poor man.:o

Floss

LL why not set up a rule on your email, so all her emails go straight into a separate folder and not into your inbox?