From debt to freedom...

Spendless

This is psychological abuse.

I have no doubt in my head, that the intention was to remove items whilst you were at work to cause you maximum disruption. the manner of which has been done before  (removing items from walls) but leaving you nowhere to sit and eat including for Christmas day.  When you thwarted that plan with the new lock, he came when you were in instead. Please start locking doors so no one can walk in and out. We had to do that with a certain in-law who would freely walk in without knocking whilst happily telling us they kept their own door locked. Under the pretext of telling DH I had concerns for the dog's safety if the door wasn't locked I've now got everyone into ensuring the door is kept locked when they come in or go out. 

I think upping your security is a very much needed priority and recommend you get those keys I suggested. Please make sure the security code to get any additional one cut is kept in a VERY safe space. I'm guessing the CCTV you have doesn't ping your phone when movement is detected. Are your parents in a position to help you out financially with this, either as a loan or as a gift even if you have to forfeit a birthday/Xmas gift in the future? I'd also suggest ringing somewhere like women's aid. Maybe they could help with things you've not thought of?

Surely he is in breach of whatever agreement you came to with the solicitor about the return of household items still in family usage? 

Hope your DD is feeling better soon. Take from it it at least stops visitors whilst she's positive. Do what you can for Christmas and don't stress about it. 

Honeysucklelou2

Thank you Spendless. The CCTV that is  up at the moment is trained on the door and pings any movement to DD3’s phone. Unfortunately she had switched it off that morning because she knew I was in...we won’t be making that mistake again. That’s a good idea using the dog as a reason since the elderly lurcher can open the door himself. Will talk to the older DDs about that. DD3 is in favour of getting a bolt too which I agree with.

At some point in the New Year, I have to get the outer front door locks changed as I have no key to that door despite living here,  although I do have a key to the inner front door and have changed that. The outer front door is beyond me and will have to be a locksmith job for which I will be asking for those  extra security keys - so glad you mentioned them Spendless as I’ve never heard of them before.

Sun_Addict

Please take care and keep yourself safe as he is starting to sound unhinged. 

Sun_Addict

Please take care and keep yourself safe as he is starting to sound unhinged. 

Honeysucklelou2

Thank you SA...I don’t think I’ll have a problem in the next week or so as he is very Covid averse so knowing that DD1 has Covid will mean he won’t come near.
I have put the key in the lock inside and locked the door and will speak to the older DDs about keeping it locked.

Honeysucklelou2

Cherryfudge - DD1 is feeling ok, seems to be asymptomatic at the moment. We are all 🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶 due to me keeping the windows open to allow a through  flow of air!

Kitten868

Oh HSL. I'm so sorry. You must be a nervous wreck. I can't even imagine how you must be feeling. Bombshell on bombshell. Covid in the house is enough on its own. We've just had that. I came down with it 5 days later after the guilt of treating my husband like a hostage locked in our bedroom. I thought the aching was from sleeping on the sofa. I hope you all stay clear or at the very least have minimal or no reaction to it. 
I don't know what to suggest. Maybe sedatives? Diazepam or something. I really hope that the isolation doesn't hurt your income too much. 
I wish I could help you. Could do something to make it easier for you. You really have so much on your plate. 
Sending you all the love I can xxx

Drawingaline

So sorry to hear of all the extra idiocy from the ex. 

Xmas is about family not things, a few presents for the younger ones will get you through this, and hopefully by next year all this will be behind you.

Cherryfudge

Honeysucklelou2 said:

Cherryfudge - DD1 is feeling ok, seems to be asymptomatic at the moment. We are all 🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶 due to me keeping the windows open to allow a through  flow of air!

I'm glad she's feeling okay, she must be a couple of days into her count now I think. There was something in the news about not having to isolate for the full ten days if you can get a couple of negative flow tests after a week, and it may be she can throw it off, some people just do. Meanwhile as you say, it will be useful for keeping your Ex away!

Perhaps one of your friends could get a couple of bolts and post them through your door to give you a bit more peace of mind? I'm not sure which door your DD is wanting a bolt on but of it's not the outer front one, I'd suggest one for there too. Make his key useless.

janb5

I think this recent action should be reported to the police.  It might make him think twice when the police are monitoring him.
I would also contact a woman's charity to get sone advice.  They may be able to help re locks etc.