Primary School Says I am Totally Wrong About them Not Meeting My Son's Needs

BrassicWoman

Have a wee hug fom me. You have been fighting for your family for so long, I'm not surprised you got angry at yet another straw on your camel back.

I might write to the school with your concenrs and ask for the help you think is appropriate. Sounds like a classroom assistant, the same one each day, might help? Does he have a SEN? That is often the golden ticket.

ecgirl07

deannatrois wrote: »

Really no one, I know that's hard to believe. I have two with ASD, I don't go out, I'm not good at talking anyway.

He's very intelligent, he's got ASD but that's nothing to do with intellect. He should be able to do multiplication, tell the time and I'm afraid the school have been doing long division (simple stuff) since early last year lol. Honestly. He doesn't have a clue with moving decimal points, which was done years ago. I do keep teaching it to him again but he forgets (problems with maths memory I suspect, been pointing this out to the school for years). Its like my older son has a problem with remembering learned actions. He's 20, still has problems tying shoe laces, been taught loads of times but he forgets. He also had problems remembering things I know I've taught him, and has been taught in class.

If he has working memory issues then look at how to support this. Step by step procedure guides coupled with times tables card help with things like fractions.

Maths is developing where he has to know how to complete a process and apply core number knowledge, for example 2/6 of 36 requires remembering divide by bottom, multiply by top but at the same time accessing 6 and 2 times tables knowledge and correlating division fact. Thats a lot for someone with working memory issues.

Google working memory for strategies and tips.

[Deleted User]

Thank you for all your help again. Bit dispirited at the moment. But am sorting a few things out. Will update in a few days if anything worth saying.

[Deleted User]

For the comment ridiculing 'letting my son decide to not go to school'.., I live a half hour walk from the school, I have a few health problems..,carrying my son to school if he won't walk isn't an option. I have forced dressed him in the past, I have taken every thing he likes to do off him if he won't go to school. Most of the time I have convinced him eventually to go to school. But right now, I have lost all confidence in the school myself. Whatever you think of that, from my perspective it is where I am.

This is obviously not a situation I am deliriously happy about, from any perspective. I'd be grateful if people could understand that.

His brother has ASD, actually finds things more difficult than his younger brother. Not someone I'd want to take to a child in need meeting, wouldn't be fair on him.

BrassicWoman, many thanks, the school have said clearly that he is not entitled to one to one support at any time. His scores, according to them, do not signify any need for that.

I am taking him tomorrow for a 45 min assessment. Won't be a full assessment but will give an indication as to whether I am completely wrong or there is a need for further action.

BrassicWoman

sootikins wrote: »

It's not us you need to convince. It's the authorities. Who have seen that there is not a lot wrong with him that a bit of good parenting wouldn't fix.

and have a strong financial incentive to come to that conclusion.

Kaye1

You have been giving some really useful, practical advice. Take this and ignore the unkind comments. No-one can really know what it is like for you.

I like pmlindyloo's advice re: times tables and will be giving them a go.

BrassicWoman

deannatrois wrote: »

I am taking him tomorrow for a 45 min assessment. Won't be a full assessment but will give an indication as to whether I am completely wrong or there is a need for further action.

I hope this turns out to be helpful.

ERICS_MUM

This is going to sound very pushy but you seem desperate so here goes !

If you live in Essex I'd be happy to go with you. I have no experience in education but a long career of attending gruelling customer interviews and making sure all issues were addressed.

EM x

groovy_chick

sootikins wrote: »

You're not mad but you're letting a child call the shots. Refusing to go to school?? PMSL.

Your own social skills don't sound up to much either, tbh. Walking out of a meeting instead of calmly discussing things.

A boat with no water? :rotfl: What, has it run aground

Well, Sootikins, I don't know what kind of ivory tower you live in, but your perfect view of life and parenting is a long way away from the way most of us in the 'real world' find it.

I have a huge amount of sympathy and compassion for the OP. As a mother of imperfect children, I can relate to the struggles when they don't want to go to school, when you can't be there to fight their corner between 9 and 3 and most of all when the education system tries to treat all children the same, when we all know they have different needs.

My only advice, OP, is that maybe your sons attainment scores are not as important as his happiness right now. Maybe if you can focus on how to make him happier and less stressed, then the academic achievements may come more easily?

Sending much love

Gc x

GwylimT

sootikins wrote: »

It's not us you need to convince. It's the authorities. Who have seen that there is not a lot wrong with him that a bit of good parenting wouldn't fix.

Parenting does not fix a neurological disorder.