Changing Name By Deed Poll questions (merged)

Becles

astonsmummy wrote:

I've decided to change both ours to my mums by deed pole it will just be easier.

Hang on a minute before you rush off and do it!

Has Aston's father got parental responsibility? I think if he has his name on the birth certificate he does have parental responsibility, but do check that out in case I am wrong.

If he does, you cannot change Astons name without his permission. The father can raise an objection in court and it can get messy and expensive for you.

Do take proper advice from a legal eagle on this before you do anything. It's better to be safe than sorry where vindictive ex partners are concerned.

astonsmummy

The problem is, i dont know where he is and dont have any way of contacting him.

Janepig

Try this AM http://www.ukdps.co.uk/CanIChangeMyChildrensNames.html (hope it works, I'm not very good at posting links and things). It has some interesting bits on it about parental responsibility and also about how you go about doing it when you don't know the father's whereabouts (as you mention above).

Jxx

*Louise*

astonsmummy wrote:

I just dont want us having different surnames, and i like his dad more than mine and i would not want to curse my son by giving him my name, i want it to die out like it should.
Maybe it would be easier to change both our names to my mums.

Wow - is your last name really THAT bad??

I too was wondering why you would want to take on the name of someone you weren't with anymore.

Maybe your mum's name for both of you would be for the best - as long as your ex can't object to his son's name being changed.

astonsmummy

*Louise* wrote:

Wow - is your last name really THAT bad??

I too was wondering why you would want to take on the name of someone you weren't with anymore.

Maybe your mum's name for both of you would be for the best - as long as your ex can't object to his son's name being changed.

basically my father aka the spem doner is an evil narsassistic !!!!!! who among ALOT of other things threatened to kill me and my mum just after i had come out of surgery after having a c-section, he ruined what was supposed to be the happiest day of my life, told me not to give aston our surname, so i didnt, i no longer talk to him, and never wish to talk to him ever again, i just want to rid him from my life.

*Louise*

astonsmummy wrote:

basically my father aka the spem doner is an evil narsassistic !!!!!! who among ALOT of other things threatened to kill me and my mum just after i had come out of surgery after having a c-section, he ruined what was supposed to be the happiest day of my life, told me not to give aston our surname, so i didnt, i no longer talk to him, and never wish to talk to him ever again, i just want to rid him from my life.

Then I completely understand why you don't want his name. Quite right too.

Bossyboots

astonsmummy wrote:

The problem is, i dont know where he is and dont have any way of contacting him.

Unfortunately that makes no difference whatsoever. If he has PR you have to have his permission to change your son's name.

As for changing your name, google statutory declaration and you should find a template for this. In fact I have done it for you http://ftm.org.uk/node/54.

Type this up yourself, print onto a decent piece of paper and get it witnessed. All done and dusted for no more than £5 (the cost of getting it witnessed). You should already be using your new name before making the declaration as, as you will see, you do it in that new name.

If you decide to risk and change your son's name too, I will tell you how to amend it for that purpose.

astonsmummy

Just found this on the deed poll website, looks as though i'd have to go down this route as i only knew his mum but she has moved to gateshead and i have no contact details for her either.

http://www.ukdps.co.uk/CanIChangeMyChildrensNames.html#Section5
5. Changing a child's name without the consent of an absent father who has parental responsibility
It may be possible for a parent who has custody of a child to change the child's name by Deed Poll without the other parent's consent if the other parent's whereabouts is not known. Usually, this situation arises where a mother wishes to change the surname of her child because the child has the father's surname and the father is now absent through separation or divorce. The mother may have entered into a new relationship (and is using her new partner's surname) or has reverted to using her maiden name.

If this is your situation, you can apply for a Deed Poll and support your application with a letter of consent, which should include information about what reasonable measures you have taken to contact the absent father - for example, writing to the father's last known address and contacting relatives and friends of the father etc. The letter should also include details of the period of absence by the father and examples of the father's lack of interest, for example, no maintenance payments and no Christmas or birthday cards or presents received by your child (see Letter 4 on the example letters of consent page).

Please note that the issue of a Deed Poll by us - where one of the parents is absent and uncontactable - is no guarantee that all official record holders, e.g. school, doctor, passport office etc, will change your child’s name records. This is because official record holders should satisfy themselves that all those with parental responsibility have consented to the child’s name change. If the consent of an absent and uncontactable parent is not obtained, an official record holder can refuse to change a child’s name records. Our experience is that this rarely happens except with the Passport Office. The official position of the Passport Office concerning the issue of children’s passports where the father has parental responsibility but his whereabouts is unknown, is to require a court order. It may be that your passport application will be successful - certainly many have been in the past - but with a general move towards tighter government control over documents such as passports, it is very likely that you will be asked for a court order.

The only way to guarantee that a Deed Poll will be effective is to obtain a court order permitting the parent with custody to change their child's name without the consent of the absent parent. If your situation is straight forward (for example, the father has been absent for several years; does not make any contact with his children and does not make any financial contribution), you should have no problem getting a court order. Applying for a court order is not difficult so do not be put off from doing what you think will be a daunting experience

Bossyboots

astonsmummy, be very careful you are not going to waste your money. You can see from what that site says itself that going down that route does not give you a document that has to be accepted in law. The school I worked at does not entertain any name change documents for a child unless it is clear that fathers with PR have consented or a statutory declaration is produced on which the first line states "I am the mother of ............. All persons with parental responsibility have agreed to his/her named being changed.

jo_b_2

s55shh wrote:

Assuming your ex was happy with this! If your son's only 2 1/2 the ex will have parental responsibility (assuming he's named on Birth Certificate) and therefore has as much legal right as you to decide whether your son changes his surname or not.

Now about this deep pole

Sorry - can astonsmummy confirm that the father is named on the birth certificate? If he isn't, then she would be able to change Aston's surname without his consent, so the above debate is irrelevant.

If he is named then he will have PR and will need to consent, regardless of his role in the child's life.