Guest staying free - house rules?

JReacher1

Mojisola wrote: »

As she is living for free in the OP's house, why wouldn't she be expected to behave well rather than getting roaring drunk or behaving in other objectionable ways?

I would expect her to be respectful to her host when staying in the property. I wouldn't have expectations of their behaviour during time when they are not in the property which is what the OP has.

fierystormcloud

JReacher1 wrote: »

It's weird that you have expectations of her professional behaviour.

Unless I am mistaken you have nothing to do with the conference she is attending so although she should act professionally at the conference (if she doesn't want to its none of your business) I don't think she would be expected to act in a professional manner 24/7 for the whole of the trip (like you seem to think she should).

It seems like you think you're this girls mother!

This. ^^^ I have to say, I am at a loss to fathom why the OP even offered to let this girl stay.

ScorpiondeRooftrouser

I am reminded of people who, when you say you are going to get a taxi somewhere, say "Oh don't do that I'll give you a lift." Then when it comes to it, they just "have to pop somewhere" or arrive late or have x and y to visit on the way, and you end up being much later than you want to be.

They then sit there waiting to be thanked for their marvellous helpfulness.

If you are going to do something for somebody, you do it in a way that suits them. If you don't want to, just don't offer. They will almost certainly be happier sorting something else out that much better fits their requirements.

HiToAll

I dont think the OP should have let her stay, unless we have moved and are now back in the 1920's.

OP should never have anyone stay, or in fact visit their house just in case they should as much as sneeze in the house.

ThumbRemote

Someone does something nice. The internet trolls come out in force. What a truly sad world some people must live in.

missbiggles1

ThumbRemote wrote: »

Someone does something nice. The internet trolls come out in force. What a truly sad world some people must live in.

I think it's a shame to spoil a generous offer by doing it so begrudgingly.

ScorpiondeRooftrouser

ThumbRemote wrote: »

Someone does something nice. The internet trolls come out in force. What a truly sad world some people must live in.

If your thinking is entirely binary, you might well be of this opinion.

In the real world having good intentions doesn't make whatever you do useful.

And when you use the fact that you are "doing something nice" or "doing it for free" to do it haphazardly and badly, you have to make that clear before doing it as the person you are doing it for might well prefer to pay and have it done properly.

I have wasted a lot of my time in my life waiting for people who are "doing me favours" that I could have done much better without.

ThumbRemote

ScorpiondeRooftrouser wrote: »

If your thinking is entirely binary, you might well be of this opinion.

In the real world having good intentions doesn't make whatever you do useful.

And when you use the fact that you are "doing something nice" or "doing it for free" to do it haphazardly and badly, you have to make that clear before doing it as the person you are doing it for might well prefer to pay and have it done properly.

I have wasted a lot of my time in my life waiting for people who are "doing me favours" that I could have done much better without.

The OP did make their rules clear from the outset. Their visitor accepted those rules.

JReacher1

ThumbRemote wrote: »

The OP did make their rules clear from the outset. Their visitor accepted those rules.

I think you've misread the OP/thread.

The rules were not made clear at the outset when the room was offered.

The room was offered by the OP which was then accepted by the guest. The OP then started to worry about some slightly over the top scenarios e.g. house burning down, animals running free, burglary happening every night and came up with some rules that had to be obeyed by the guest.

The guest then accepted these rules.

As the room had already been accepted and there was little time for the OP to find alternative arrangements they had no choice but to accept the rules imposed on them.

No one doubts that the OP has been very generous but it seems pretty obvious by reading the thread that they regretted doing it!

ThumbRemote

JReacher1 wrote: »

I think you've misread the OP/thread.

The rules were not made clear at the outset when the room was offered.

The room was offered by the OP which was then accepted by the guest. The OP then started to worry about some slightly over the top scenarios e.g. house burning down, animals running free, burglary happening every night and came up with some rules that had to be obeyed by the guest.

The guest then accepted these rules.

As the room had already been accepted and there was little time for the OP to find alternative arrangements they had no choice but to accept the rules imposed on them.

No one doubts that the OP has been very generous but it seems pretty obvious by reading the thread that they regretted doing it!

If someone were to stay at your house, would you have some house rules for them? Or would you just accept them doing whatever they wanted?