Why are some people really tight with their money?

Sam_Fallow

i_was_taught_2b_cautious wrote: »

Why are some people really tight with money, and don't spend on thing normal people do ?

Everybody knows somebody like that, and if you don't then it's you.

FBaby

I am talking about people who do have money, but come across as being always skint

How do you know these people actually have money? There was a thread only a few weeks ago about someone saying that she didn't know how to avoid people's invitation to go out because they had pretended to be financially stable but the reality is that they were struggling and couldn't afford it, but they didn't feel comfortable and coming out saying so.

The reality is you don't know other people's situation. You seem to assume that people make excuses not to go out because they don't want to spend the money but maybe they just don't want to go out with whoever invited them.

Maybe their money is all tight into investments, maybe they are saving to retire early, maybe they are in severe debts and don't sleep at night.

FBaby

I also refuse to split a bill, I won't subsidise someone elses meal.

Actually, I can't but wonder whether some people who complain that others are tight are indeed those who eat and drink the most but then have an issue with those who want to split the bill.

I always order tap water when I go out for a meal because I don't drink alcohol and water is what I like to drink with a meal. OH will normally only have one. Both of us are not big eaters and will never have three course meals, often only one course. that's not because we are tight just because that's how we like it. This means that our meal often comes to half the cost of other's. Yet some people in our group of friends seem to think that the bill should always be divided equally every time. After about 6 such meals, OH said that we would only pay for ours, which ended up with bad feelings, most of the group agreeing with us, but two members muttering that we were tight etc... It's left us not really keen to go out with the whole group again.

So I guess where we might be seen as tight, we see others as taking the p..., it's all a matter of interpretation!

Feral_Moon

What would you do if a friend invited you out for dinner and offered to pay for the food if you covered the cost of drinks/gratuity (assuming it was a relatively even split of course) and then when the bill arrives they produce vouchers to cover their part instead of cash?

Would you accept this, as you're not paying anything more than you'd originally planned to or would you expect your friend to cover your food bill with their vouchers but then to also split the drinks/gratuity with you?

Spendless

You don't know peoples circs. Our £25k+ car on the drive is my husband's company one. It is a 'perk' of his job. It actually means he is heavily taxed on it and we live on a lower net income than anyone else on his salary without a company car, which he needs to do his job.

I lost my job recently. My wages though sporadic paid for all our 'extras'. We are currently having to find a way of going without or finding the income by saving elsewhere whilst I search for employment.

74jax

Feral_Moon wrote: »

What would you do if a friend invited you out for dinner and offered to pay for the food if you covered the cost of drinks/gratuity (assuming it was a relatively even split of course) and then when the bill arrives they produce vouchers to cover their part instead of cash?

Would you accept this, as you're not paying anything more than you'd originally planned to or would you expect your friend to cover your food bill with their vouchers but then to also split the drinks/gratuity with you?

Wouldn't bother me, I'm not sure what the problem would be? I'd more than likely do the 2-4-1 cocktails offer at the same time and wouldn't think anything of it either.


How they choose to pay wouldn't bother me, whether they paid in vouchers, cash or credit card.

Foxriver8

fierystormcloud wrote: »

You can get a card for about 29p off market stalls and from certain shops. If people don't want to give cards, then don't; but they shouldn't use 'I can't afford a card' as an excuse. Anyone can afford a greetings card.

One of my cousins claims she is skint all the time, and even though she expects cards and gifts for her 5 kids and 3 grandkids, she never ever gives anything back; ever. And her mother and a couple of other family members make excuses for her. However, she still finds £35.00 a week for cigarettes, £20 a week for the bingo, and £20 a week for the pub. Yet she can't fork out 29p for a greeting card for someone.

I understand that people are skint sometimes, but the ones that claim they are, often aren't, as they will find the money for something when it suits them.

I know people like this - it drives me mad. Selfish and ignorant, particularly when they expect cards and gifts in return. They people I know will also cancel plans at the last minute saying they can't afford it. As them not turning up would really upset certain other family members who would like to see them, it's very obvious that what they mean is "I want to go but I'm not willing to pay", therefore someone else usually ends up paying for them to go. Not cool, when they sit there and talk about the new clothes etc they have just bought online. :mad::mad:

Pollycat

goodwithsaving wrote: »

I pay my way, but I don't waste money on eating out (unless I have a voucher) or on cards for anyone except relatives.

I don't see eating out as 'wasting money'. It can be a very pleasant experieince.
Alhough because we both cook a lot, we can produce some pretty good Italian food so we are quite choosy about what cuisine we eat.

ciderwithrosie wrote: »

We all know the people that make the most drinks in the office but 'forget' to put their money in the tea fund every week or the person that will go to the pub and only have a fruit juice if they're paying for themselves but will have a double spirits and mixer if someone else offers to pay; The 'oh dear I've got no change to chip in for the taxi, I'll give it you back later' and never do, or those that haggle at boot sales over a 50p item!

Then point it out and 'out' them to friends and colleagues.

FBaby wrote: »

Actually, I can't but wonder whether some people who complain that others are tight are indeed those who eat and drink the most but then have an issue with those who want to split the bill.

I always order tap water when I go out for a meal because I don't drink alcohol and water is what I like to drink with a meal. OH will normally only have one. Both of us are not big eaters and will never have three course meals, often only one course. that's not because we are tight just because that's how we like it. This means that our meal often comes to half the cost of other's. Yet some people in our group of friends seem to think that the bill should always be divided equally every time. After about 6 such meals, OH said that we would only pay for ours, which ended up with bad feelings, most of the group agreeing with us, but two members muttering that we were tight etc... It's left us not really keen to go out with the whole group again.

So I guess where we might be seen as tight, we see others as taking the p..., it's all a matter of interpretation!

I have no obection to anyone who wants to pay for their own food & drink, in fact if I was out with a crowd of women I'd prefer it as I don't want to feel I should choose a cheaper item from the menu than I'd really want.
However, I did notice when I was working that some people when totting up their share (to the penny using a calculator) forget (by mistake or deliberately, who knows) to include that expensive Italian coffe that wasn't part of the '2 course special'.

We used to see a couple socially, he was incredibly tight.
Would get to the door first, hold it open and everyone would say 'How polite he is!'
Not at all - just making sure he got to the bar last.
When it was his round, he'd be swilling his dregs around saying 'I guess we've all had enough' but me and OH were wise to his tricks.

After a number of things like this, we went for a meal with a group of people. He and his partner had aperitifs, some of the most expensive food on the menu, liqueur coffees etc.
When the bill came, the general concensus was that we split but he decided he'd rather pay for their own.
Trouble was he added his food up entirely omitting to include their portion of wine, aperitifs, plate of olives, coffees.
And plonked his money down on the table to the penny - no tip.
He was one of those guys who thought he was clever but wasn't at all really.

When I pointed this out, he suddenly decided he would rather split the bill.
We insisted he paid for what they'd eaten & drank and the other couples split the remainder.
A very public embarassment and they were excluded from our circle.

Pixie5740

My friend's dad is a millionaire and a miser which is probably how he came to be a millionaire because it wasn't inherited wealth. He needed a new pair of shoes and refused to spend more than £10. The reason the shoes were only £10 is because they were a mis-matched pair of two different sizes. Walking around in ill-fitting shoes when he could easily afford a pair that fitted properly seems unnecessarily tight - to me at least.

Pollycat

Pixie5740 wrote: »

My friend's dad is a millionaire and a miser which is probably how he came to be a millionaire because it wasn't inherited wealth. He needed a new pair of shoes and refused to spend more than £10. The reason the shoes were only £10 is because they were a mis-matched pair of two different sizes. Walking around in ill-fitting shoes when he could easily afford a pair that fitted properly seems unnecessarily tight - to me at least.

And I bet one of the shoes was also unnecessarily tight too.....:rotfl: