Debt ridden family from hell

FBaby

Just wanted to be clear, I don't doubt your good faith in any way in this situation, I'm just playing devils' advocate of how others might decide to perceive your 'sudden' willingness to take control of the situation.

I do wish you good luck with sorting out this matter for your MIL, but be prepared that at anytime, she could very well shift her alliance again and decide that you're the one who is manipulating her whilst your SIL and OH have always wanted the best for her. All I'm saying is watch out how emotional involved you are prepared to get in this as it could so easily backfire.

Yorkshire_Midge

@Fbaby - no offence taken. A bit of devils advocate helps my thinking. Don't think there's any chance of a change of allegiance but its a valid point we wouldn't have considered right now and we'll take it into account.


@moneyistooshort - they are away for a few days on their little holiday anyway, so she does get a break and a bit of time to think. Just coming across to ours shortly for tea. But it's a very good idea and I'll certainly try. The finances may be a bit harder - they have internet access to her account but I'm not clear if they can instigate any online transfers (she writes cheques to them normally).


@Caroline - hell, that story was sooooooo sad to read.

AdrianC

Yorkshire_Midge wrote: »

The finances may be a bit harder - they have internet access to her account

She needs to change the password NOW.

moneyistooshorttomention

They have internet access to her account:eek::eek::eek::shocked::shocked:_pale__pale__pale_:eek::eek::eek:

Ohmygawd! That's got to be priority to try and deal with that.

Caroline_a

they have internet access to her account but I'm not clear if they can instigate any online transfers (she writes cheques to them normally).

Of course they can if they have full access. And if you've read the thread I posted you will see that is how the story unfolded and the brother cleaned out the father. I fear that you are too late, all they need to do is a couple of chunky tranfers and mother in law is broke. Sadly, she appears to still cherish the notion that all will be well. I think we all know different who have heard your tale.

I don't think there is anything you can do as mother in law is still partly holding on to the belief that they will build this extension. It is her mess and I don't think you can bail her out without losing your life savings either.

Money_maker

Please be aware that this is not uncommon and many elderly people suffer financial abuse from their families.

Some have a fine time using paypal and amazon from other peoples bank accounts. All they need is the card numbers.

Oddly enough this fine specimen of family that I'm talking about is currently enjoying their holiday with their family too.

Its very difficult to get the abused relative to do anything. They will of course understand that their relative is a common thief but they will very rarely want to take it further. This is what you're up against.

ukmaggie45

Yorkshire_Midge wrote: »

<snip> She was determined she wouldn't be bullied any more, and was going back to "her home" whilst they sort it out. She wouldn't even stop with us the first night after it all blew up. Just marched back in there like she was taking on Hitler.

I thought in your initial post you said that they had made her sell her home. So how come she can march back into it?

If she still has the flat just let her live in it. She doesn't sound like a very nice person to me. But...

Are you for real? I wonder if you are trolling the helpful people of MSE forums.

It's Easter hols time remember folks!

moneyistooshorttomention

This is the thing - if MIL has indeed had a "bit of a say" to this thief in her family - then he might well be getting up to mischief whilst on holiday - as he suspects the goose is going to stop laying those golden eggs.

Time is of the essence - or, as a poster pointed out, they could just take out a couple of sizeable chunks of her money and leave her right in it.

How much of an overdraft facility has she got on this account too? As they might also max her overdraft out.

KiKi

ukmaggie45 wrote: »

I thought in your initial post you said that they had made her sell her home. So how come she can march back into it?

The marching back into is post ("her home") was clearly a reference to sister-in-law and brother's home. Ie, she's not going to be bullied, and she lives there, so she's staying there.

Are you for real? I wonder if you are trolling the helpful people of MSE forums.

Or you just mis-read.

marksoton

This isn't going to end well. And the longer it's left the worse it'll get...