No friends or family

Jackzzz

redlaces wrote: »

OP, I can really sympathise with your situation - I'm also 27 and as a result of a relationship breakdown I found myself living and working in a different city to anyone I knew, and with no funds to move anywhere else I had to start from scratch in terms of building up a social network. I also regarded myself as shy and not much of a conversationalist and so really felt uncomfortable seeking out people and social situations, and converting acquaintances into friendships was difficult for me... so I can definitely see where you are coming from!

Fast forward a couple of years and I definitely feel like I'm established in my new inadvertent hometown, from my experience of doing just this, the best tip I can give you is to try all the hobbies you can think of and that interest you. Make a commitment to do something three nights a week if this works. Ask people if they fancy a pint after the class/training session. Somewhere along the line you will end up meeting people you get on with.

Sports teams and clubs in particular have very social aspects that are easy to involve yourself with and there is always something to talk about... like which race you are running next and how you are training, we got hammered by that team last week didn't we, did you see the football match at the weekend? All of this will lead naturally onto other conversation. If you have two hobbies or sports you can talk about one when out with the other one! You can always ask people if they want to train with you between club meets, if the thought of going for a pint and having full-on conversation would be too scary. I found a really friendly running club last year and haven't looked back since, I developed a whole new social circle from it!

Eat out on your own. Plenty of people do this on business. Just take a phone or a book. Added bonus: you don't have to quibble or compromise on which restaurant to go to

Holiday on your own. It is so liberating. Take a trip to somewhere in Europe to start with and stay in hostels - these often have common areas which have board or card games, just ask someone if they fancy playing with you and voilà! And you can ask people about their travels, this is a great way to find out things you have in common, share tips, even plan future trips and meetups! You never know, you may meet someone from the same area as you back home... (has happened to me before, I met someone from the same village!)

Do you learn or speak any languages? Language exchanges take place regularly and are all about talking to people, and are a good way to practise!

Honestly, there are so many people out there to meet. Eventually it will click into place.

Cheers for the great reply. I think I'm just thinking it's harder than it is. I'll admit that I've not actually made any effort to meet new people so I guess I should give it a try before complaining about how hard it will be

Thanks to everyone for all the awesome advice, really needed to get this off my chest and your tips were helpful.

duchy

Jackzzz wrote: »

Cheers for the great reply. I think I'm just thinking it's harder than it is. I'll admit that I've not actually made any effort to meet new people so I guess I should give it a try before complaining about how hard it will be

Thanks to everyone for all the awesome advice, really needed to get this off my chest and your tips were helpful.

Are you going to keep us updated ?

The first time you step out of your comfort zone is hard and a bit scary- but once you've done it once it gets easier every time. Take the leap

Jackzzz

I might post my first experience, let you know how I get on

Bobcrowther

prosaver wrote: »

so your not going to teach us.
.iwas quite loking forward to that and i tell great jokes.
this bear walks in a bar and says..
can i have a pint of.........
...........
...........
........

....................larger please .


the bar man says ..
thats strange a talking bear.
but what i dont understand is the long pauses

It's not a forex course you need, it's an English teacher.

PlymouthMaid

You have had some great advice ... Good luck x

duchy

Jackzzz wrote: »

I might post my first experience, let you know how I get on

OK Social skills 101

If people help you telling them you MIGHT take the time to let them know how the advice they took the time to give you worked out sounds rather stand offish....... I'm sure you didn't mean it that way but sometimes it can help to think how you say things will make other people feel. I know you're a little out of practice and I'm honestly not having a go

Peter333

prosaver wrote: »

so your not going to teach us.
.iwas quite loking forward to that and i tell great jokes.
this bear walks in a bar and says..
can i have a pint of.........
...........
...........
........

....................larger please .


the bar man says ..
thats strange a talking bear.
but what i dont understand is the long pauses

Bobcrowther wrote: »

It's not a forex course you need, it's an English teacher.

Glad it's not just me who is confused.

I totally do not get that 'joke.' :huh:

A pint of larger what?

heuchera

long pause = long paws??

Peter333

heuchera wrote: »

long pause = long paws??

Hmmmm, if that IS what it is, then it's not funny!

And as I said, a pint of larger what? Why not a pint of smaller something? :huh:

Haylescom

For "larger", read lager, for "long", read big.