Hello Again...

Abz12

Today went ok, not as bad as expected tbh. Plus I'm looking forward to the mileage I can claim back. Put £30 petrol in but would have put that in anyway and still have more than half a tank left. Lunch was also on the company.

Went to see my friend after, which was nice, she wants to do a spa day at the end of Feb so thought to save money I could invite another friend who's birthday it is. Might even try an get some cashback on it...bit cheeky lol.

Spending wise...another NSD. Forgot to transfer £50 so will do that now along with the council tax so that's £117 off the card already. That should leave £209.89 left of the interest paying balance. Hopefully I'm doing my maths right!

Checked my top cashback and 21p has been confirmed, just waiting on the rest. Total amount is now £3.50. Still got the money from nationwide to come and the balance from eBay. That's at least £120 with them all of them combined!

Busy weekend moving to my moms, so might not check in till Monday, have a good one everyone!

Abz12

What a busy weekend that was...so busy I couldn't get motivated!!!

Managed to finish reading your diary Abba. You have done an amazing job at tackling your debt. Your diary inspired me to join some survey websites to generate some extra income so i joined Yougov, I-say & swag bucks for the surveys. Not sure if I have the time to join any others plus am little worried about if I have to declare it for tax purposes. Have had a go today but they take so long to complete and if your are not eligible then they give you 1 SB! The effort it takes just doesn't seem worth it but I will keep going.

Very spendy weekend even though I was busy packing stuff up. Brought the paint from homebase for the bathroom and hall way. Used the topcashback website which says I should get 2.1% but it isn't showing as tracking the purchase yet so will keep an eye on that. Two 2.5l came to £20, not bad considering the price of it usually. Also went to tescos to do a mini shop whilst we are at my moms and dropped that off. It came to less than £20 but my OH will be paying half. My mom went to Costco and brought me some washing powder, deodorant and wipes - OH will be paying half for the powder and wipes so no big concern and I enjoy buying in bulk...sad aren't I.

We had takeaways Friday, Saturday and tonight!! I know I know it's bad!! Used just eat so have made some money back from that lol.

I did have a little panic today as I thought I wouldn't have enough to cover the bills but must have and this must be some sort of mini anxiety attack. I did a bit of detective work and found out my OH got paid £200 more than usual this month but when I asked he did confess. I've agreed he doesn't have to give me anything this month as we are moving out but wishing I never said this now.

Have a few things coming up in the next month that i really could do without, dad is visiting, moms partners birthday, Valentine's Day (which is sorted) and friends birthday (the one going to Paris) another friends birthday, plus a girl from work wants to go out for a meal to celebrate hers!! How does everyone else tell their friends they can't take part?? March is an expensive month for me as well with mothers day, OHs birthday, nan & grandads anniversary and friends baby shower - need to get organised. Tomorrow I will go to the card shop and buy the following;
- happy birthday for moms partner
- general happy birthday for friends x2
-Mother's Day card
- anniversary card for nan and grandad
-baby shower card

As my friend, who is going to Paris and another friend of mine have the birthday in the same month I suggested a spa day. Thought It might be cheaper for me! Not so sure now but could do with a treat besides a takeaway!

Another argument with OH about rent money tonight. He thinks he can give me £300 and this should include shopping and cat bits....err no!!! Apparently he is more than happy to pay £50 a week to live in a bed sit so I told him to go ahead. All I keep hearing now is ' you would have to pay for the bills anyway.' Looks like I won't be getting any help with my debt after all. He said its my fault for spending when I don't have the money. I completely agree, when we had no food in the cupboard I should have let us starve instead or when I needed a new tyre for the car I should have just left it an drove around on a flat tyre!! I am VERY angry right now. I have paid for everything all these years an now he's working he doesn't want to contribute. I just asked him 'so you have £700 spare each month and I have a few hundred which I have to use to pay down my debt and that's ok?' He was like £245 is my final offer! Looks like we are splitting up because I'm not having it.

Sorry for the long post...needed to get this off my chest especially the last part !!

abba1772

Oh my goodness does your other half live in the real world......go let him live in a bed sit the absolute twit (I'm being polite here) xx

Can't believe he's negotiating and it's only £55 difference he's negotiating you stick to your guns, if you do split up its his loss xx

Moneywhizz

I agree with abba. Your oh is being so unreasonable and selfish. After you paying for so much over the years. No wonder you are so mad and you do need to stick to your guns until he sees sense. He doesn't seem to realise when he is well off. I think a taste of the real world might bring him to his senses.

Abz12

Hello - moving was very stressful especially this morning. I took the morning off work but my OH went in, typical. Not sure why I took the morning off when I was at my moms and unpacked by 9! Oh well a chance to chill I suppose. Hopefully it won't take the full 9 days for the work to be done. As I went in after lunch I decided to get the train which cost me £2.70, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to find parking. Spent nothing an didn't even manage to get the cards I need as the train was delayed so never had enough time.

I agree with the both of you abba and MW - he's immature and doesn't think he should pay for things that he doesn't use. He has no sense of how life is.

Checked my bank balance and most of the big bills have come out now. Paid the minimum £25 on the nationwide balance and the £117 I sent to Halifax is still not showing. If not showing by the end of the week I will call them to chase it, I bet they will calculate the interest on the old balance! Cheeky!

Done a few surveys tonight...tired so going to bed. Night all.

Kitten868

I am genuinely flabbergasted by the way he speaks to you. No respect or gratitude. I think now would be a good time to tell him to do one. Even if it's just to get some perspective while you're at your mums. Send him to his parents... Mull over whether he wants to return there. If you're paying for everything anyway what's the point?
Get a lodger or a flat mate at least they'll pay their way.
You're doing so well. He's bringing you down. And you're paying for him! It's ridiculous.

Hope you work something out sweet. Talk to your mum... And maybe his too xxx

abba1772

Can I ask how old your oh is????? He's sounds very immature xx

Abz12

Kitten - this is one thing that really gets me, his attitude. I love him and I don't want to sound like I'm bashing him all the time but he doesn't have much respect for anything. He always thinks he's right and won't budge on anything. Today he told me he's not having anything for lunch as he doesn't have enough money! That's complete BS!


Abba - He's 29 in a couple of weeks.,,scary isn't it!! Almost 30, in his first job and never paid a bill. I blame myself for being too good to him. We saw a relationship councillor for 2 years, for various reasons, and she said our relationship was somewhat parent child - me being the parent, him the child. We have done a lot of work around this for the past three years but the foundations are still there it seems. I'm not without blame, I never told him to get up and get a job because I didn't think I had to. I have given him everything, a roof, food, a car etc. He told me last night he wants me to close the home savings account so he can move out. I am going to call his bluff and do it, if only I had time!

Today would have been a NSD except I finally got around to buying the cards I need for Feb/March. Spent £4.45. No baby shower card tho. Had a brilliant idea, my friend would like a feeding cushion for her baby so going to order through Argos and get cashback, only £15. Plus my mom has a gift card so will buy that from her.

Checked the Halifax balance and the £117 is now showing. Woohoo!! Paid the minimum on nationwide also. When I get a minute I will update my signature. Was thinking I might not be able to clear the interest paying debt this month but with my expenses coming from the mileage and the refund for the meal I may as well put that all on to it. Should be about £145, plus the £100 from nationwide, it should be cleared, keep your fingers crossed for me ladies. X

abba1772

He sounds awfully like my brother in law he's only but working a year but all my sister gets is I work so I should get to spend my money how I like...........they have 4 kids btw but he thinks the child benefit and tax credits should cover them .......silly man xx

Abz12

Abba - that's what frightens me and probably why we are not married yet. I couldn't live like this with kids and if he was my husband I would have divorced him!

I missed yesterday as I'm under a bit of stress at the minute. Work is really getting to me and there just doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day. I always feel like I'm being rushed in everything. Need to remember to slow down.

Not much in the money saving front tbh. Had fish and chips for tea last night plus after work had a very nice and large glass of red and big slice of choc cake with a work colleague. Need to get back on the money saving malarkey. Today so far has been NSD, shake for lunch and that's it. Tomorrow my work are buying us a breakfast sandwhich so I will be indulging then. Haven't even had time to do yoga or study!

Hope everyone else is well!