Facebook dilemma

absolutereturn

barbarawright wrote: »

My experience of FB seems very different from everyone else's here - I don't see any drama at all. I'm in a few special interest groups - an actor, The Archers, various authors. Plus I post a lot about what films I'm seeing and books I'm reading and this leads to all sorts of interesting conversations. Yes, I also post pictures of food - leads to chat about recipes, or my holidays and my friends do the same but we seem to manage without any drama though there can be the occasional spat about politics. Just as in Real Life. Funny how the people who dismiss it are the people who don't actually use it.

Facebook is a medium like any other: the post, the phone, the internet, blogs, forums, etc. How they are used is up to the individual. It can be used for drama or for anything else. I tend to post mostly photos of holidays, day trips, events, etc. and nothing controversial, very personal or work related to avoid trouble.

The one issue I can see with FB is that all your FB friends can see who your other friends are and some of my friends may not like some other friends. This has been the case since I was in school so not a situation caused by FB but it has caused some friction and resulted in a couple of relatives un-friending me as a result. C'est la vie...:(

Pollycat

I don't 'do' FB & have limited knowledge of it & it's workings but I can't understand why a grown woman would want to be 'friends' with her sons' friends.
I can understand why the sons are friends but not the parents.

Andypandyboy

I use FB, but only have my (adult) own kids as friends, not the children of friends.

I use it to keep in touch with friends/relatives around the world. I can honestly say that I have never seen a negative or nasty post from any of my friends or relatives. I don't think FB is the problem here.

barbarawright

Andypandyboy wrote: »

I use FB, but only have my (adult) own kids as friends, not the children of friends.

I use it to keep in touch with friends/relatives around the world. I can honestly say that I have never seen a negative or nasty post from any of my friends or relatives. I don't think FB is the problem here.

Exactly. Drama queens are going to be drama queens wherever you encounter them. i try to avoid them as much as possible in real life as well as FB

Pollycat

Andypandyboy wrote: »

I use FB, but only have my (adult) own kids as friends, not the children of friends.

I use it to keep in touch with friends/relatives around the world. I can honestly say that I have never seen a negative or nasty post from any of my friends or relatives. I don't think FB is the problem here.

From what I've heard & read from various sources, I think you're probably in the minority.

Andypandyboy

Pollycat wrote: »

From what I've heard & read from various sources, I think you're probably in the minority.

You may be right, but I think that is a reflection on the choice of friends and the way family have been brought up.

If there is a family disagreement none of my kids or extended family would dream of playing it out on FB, it isn't the medium for that.

That said, amongst all my friends and family I can't think of any who have fallen out seriously.

I simply would not be friends with those who would air their dirty laundry in publc and try to drag others into it. Either on FB or in real life.

Pollycat

Sat on the bus right now & there's a young girl sat behind me having a fall out with her boyfriend on the other end of the phone about some other girl he's 'friends' with on FB.

Why some people want to conduct their private life in the public domain beats me.

JJG

absolutereturn wrote: »

The one issue I can see with FB is that all your FB friends can see who your other friends are and some of my friends may not like some other friends. This has been the case since I was in school so not a situation caused by FB but it has caused some friction and resulted in a couple of relatives un-friending me as a result. C'est la vie...:(

You can make your friends list private, so friends can only see mutual friends.

barbarawright

Pollycat wrote: »

From what I've heard & read from various sources, I think you're probably in the minority.

I don't think there's any more rows on FB than in real life. Some people thrive on drama. Others don't. The medium doesn't make any difference.

heuchera

absolutereturn wrote: »

There are much worse things that kids can get up to than going on FB "illegally". Getting involved in drugs and petty crime come to mind and you don't need FB or the internet for that. You will find that a lot of parents are aware of their kids' FB accounts and are happy with them. That means they are supervising them while they do something rather than banning them from doing it which is a much more constructive approach.

I was a kid in the 'dark ages' but, unlike many older people, I still remember very clearly what it felt like to be an 'inbetweener' and a teenager, and I can tell you if FB had been around at the time and I hadn't been allowed to join till I was 13, I'd have found a way to join, just for the heck of it. In fact, I started smoking at 11-12 and didn't enjoy it, however, I did it only because I wasn't supposed to.
When I turned 16 and I could smoke in front of mum and mum's friends, it lost its attraction and I only smoked when I was with my friends and everyone lit up, I never got hooked and stopped smoking completely at 21 when I no longer saw any point. :A

The more something is forbidden, the more attractive it becomes. :snow_laug

A ten year old child should not be using the internet unsupervised, end of.


I am shocked (not not surprised, I suppose..) that people think otherwise. Possibly they are unaware of the sort of stuff that goes on on the internet, in which case I seriously suggest they read up about it.


Parents buying them smartphones, etc and then wondering why kids access !!!!!! sites, self-harm sites, and get groomed by !!!!!philes on internet chat-rooms is nonsensical. Parent(s) need to take some responsibility!