Ran out of punishments

pigpen

foolofbeans wrote: »

thank you for your insights. I definitely need to change my mindset but it's going to be a challenge!
Yesterday was a good day. The girls asked to go to the shop and I agreed. I had mentioned perhaps it may be nice to offer the cost of the tobacco back to DH and when they came back they gave me the money for it. I gave them it back immediately as I said I just wanted the gesture and them to be genuinely sorry.
So today can start on a much more positive note and we are going to sit down and talk about what is expected and what they should expect from me. It's careers shop tomorrow for niece to see about apprenticeships and I'm going to ask them to choose a physical hobby such as swimming or judo as they could really do with getting out and letting off some steam.
I may join an exercise group to as my body needs it and my mind could probably do with some too!

Why don't you find something you can all do together?? some girly time.. build some bonds Swimming would be good for you all.. but a gym membership where there is a pool you can use might work better then you get the various exercise classes, swimming and gym.. covers most options then

I'm glad the 2 made the effort with the money.. I do hope DH thanked them for the gesture too.. I hope niece finds an apprenticeship to enjoy it makes all the difference when they enjoy what they are doing!

Good luck!

Mojisola

foolofbeans wrote: »

I had mentioned perhaps it may be nice to offer the cost of the tobacco back to DH and when they came back they gave me the money for it. I gave them it back immediately as I said I just wanted the gesture and them to be genuinely sorry.

I wouldn't have done this. They stole something - why shouldn't they have to pay for what they took?

It's also set a precedence - next time they'll be thinking "Just put on a sad face and look sorry and offer to pay; we won't really have to hand over any money".

If you really didn't want to take money off them, you could have suggested that they made up for the stealing by 'spending' time and energy on doing something nice for your OH.